Page 42 of Run Game
“What are you doing?” he says. He sounds angry, and I think maybe I’ve overstepped. This is his apartment, after all. I’m just a guest. Josh would always get so mad at me when I would move things in his apartment, even if I was only trying to help by tidying up. It’s like he was hiding something. Maybe he was.
I cower slightly. “I’m sorry,” I say. “I just had a lot of energy and thought you might like a change of scenery. I can put it ba?—”
“Dia,” he says. “We can put the couch in the bathroom if that’s where you want it. I don’t give a fuck about that.But that thing weighs like, three-hundred pounds. Let me help you. I don’t want you getting hurt.”
“Oh,” I say, quickly remembering how different he is than my ex. “Okay.”
“Come here,” he says, pulling me into his arms and kissing the top of my head. “You have the zoomies, baby?”
“Mhmm,” I mumble into his warm chest. The sound of his heartbeat against my ear calms me a little. “How can you tell?”
He huffs a laugh. “Well, you’re rearranging the living room by yourself, and you smell like a coffee factory. That kinda tipped me off.”
I giggle as he lifts me from the floor, tossing me onto the soft cushions. I land with a bounce as he leans down, pressing a chaste kiss to my lips. “Where do you want it?”
“On that wall,” I say, pointing across the room. I lay back as he picks up one end like it weighs nothing, dragging the couch along the carpet with me on it until it’s in the perfect spot. He reaches down, picking out one of the cashmere throw blankets from the basket behind him and covering me up.
“Stay right here, baby. I’ll go grab you a yogurt and some water.” I look at him adoringly as he leaves the room, heading to the kitchen. I’m pretty sure if he looked at me, I’d strongly resemble the heart-eyes emoji, but I don’t care. I’m growing pretty fond of the way he cares for me.
It wasn’t long ago that I was completely unable to accept anything from him. But he kept trying; giving me space when I needed it, but never backing away completely. I’m sure there were times when his frustration almost won, and I wouldn’t have blamed him. But henever showed it. I’ll never be able to fully express to Dalton the way that he’s changed my life. Even though I do still fear abandonment, I also have a better idea of what I’m worth. I will no longer fall at my parents’ feet every time they show me an ounce of attention. I’ll try harder to put myself out there and make more friends. And, most importantly, I’ll try to stop blaming myself for the way people have treated me in the past. Because that’s what I deserve most of all.
He comes back into the room with a cup of yogurt and a bottle of water. He hands them both to me before lifting my legs and sitting down, placing my feet in his lap. I eat and drink while he mindlessly massages my calves, making my toes curl when he hits all the right spots.
“You were training all morning. Shouldn’t I be rubbing your muscles?” I joke.
He wiggles his eyebrows. “Oh, I have a muscle you can rub.” He winks like an asshole, and I roll my eyes.
“You really are a douchebag.”
He continues rubbing my legs and feet as I finish my yogurt, telling me how Tanner was acting broodier than usual today. They all want to ask him what’s going on, but they already know he won’t answer. The Blizzard quarterback is charming, but definitely the quietest of the bunch. He’s so private with his personal life, there isn’t a single photo of him out with a woman since he was drafted five years ago. I did some sleuthing because I’m a nosey bitch, but I couldn’t find anything from before then, either. The only girl I’ve ever seen him in a photo with was a candid from his last year in college, but the caption said that she was his best friend’s sister. Other than that, he’s done a phenomenal job hiding his relationships from the public, if he’s even had any.
I put my empty cup and bottle on the coffee table as Dalton lays behind me, wrapping a heavy arm around my waist. We put on an old John Hughes movie, but it doesn’t last long before we both doze off, wasting the rest of the day away, cuddled up next to each other.
TWENTY-EIGHT
DIA
“I feellike I haven’t seen you in forever,” Mads says, sitting back on the theater room couch. We’re both in lounge clothes, just finished ourBFF Makeover Movie Nightskincare routine, and are settling in with our snacks. Bella is in New York because her brother, who’s making quite a splash on an Italian soap opera, is back in the states to shoot a movie, so the guys decided to go out for a couple of drinks while Mav was being forced to come up for air. And since it’s been a minute since we’ve done this, here we are. “How’s life?”
I think for a moment, because it’s been a whirlwind lately and I honestly haven’t had a moment to step back and process it all. Mads and I usually tell each other every detail about our days, and it’s not that I’m purposely keeping anything from her. I’ve just been so wrapped up in Dalton that I haven’t done much of anything else. We just went through this when she moved in with Blaze, but it’s a little weird that the shoe is now onmy foot.
“Crazy. Confusing.Amazing,” I say. Desperation melts over my features and she gives a sympathetic smilebecause she knows how hard this has become for me. She’s known me since we were kids and she’s seen me go through giving my heart away, only to have it broken over and over. She knows how I feel about relationships and marriage. That I’m absolutely closed off to promising forever to anyone. I’m too scared of failing as a wife. Scared of not being enough.
“You’re falling for him, aren’t you?” she asks.
“Yes.” I cringe. “Fuck him so hard for being perfect. This is all his fault.” I lay back, throwing an arm over my eyes in exasperation. “What the hell am I going to do?” I cry.
She laughs because she’s an evil shrew who clearly isn’t concerned about my current situation. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe don’t be such a dumb bitch and realize that Dalton Davis is head-over-heels in love with you. The last thing he wants to do is hurt you.”
“First of all, he doesn’tlove me. He cares about me. Just like everyone else that has come and gone from my life did at first.” She gives me a look, and I already know what she’s going to say, so I respond before she does. “I’m not saying his feelings and intentions aren’t sincere. But what happens when I’ve given him my heart, and five years down the road, he decides that I’m not what he wants? Where would that leave me?” I ask. “It’s taken me so long to be okay with being on my own. I can’t do it again.”
She reaches over, grabbing my hand and squeezing. “I’ll support whatever you choose. You know that. But please allow yourself to have some happiness, Dia. If anyone deserves it, it’s you.”
I squeeze back. “I am. I have you. I’ve been dancing with Bella. And I’ve been letting Dalton show me what I’m worth. Even though we won’t be married, I know he’llalways be in my life.” Tears fill my eyes at the thought of how much I’ve changed in the short time that I’ve been in Boston. Even though the way I ended up here wasn’t exactly ideal, it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Chicago was holding me back from growing as a person. It was filled with ill-willed people and memories of my past. Everything good is here in Boston and I really feel like I’m finally home.
“How has the job search been going?” Mads asks.
Ugh. The job search. Now that I’m broke, I’ve been sending out applications and resumes left and right. I wanted to try to get away from serving in gentleman’s clubs, so I’ve been trying for positions at restaurants in the city. Even with all the‘Help Wanted’signs I’ve seen, I’ve gotten zero calls.
