Page 40 of Touch Her and Die
I wasn’t hungry. I wasn’t even sure I could find it in me to just get angry and go find someone to fix the anger.
The world disappeared with every step. I needed to hide.
He’d driven me miles from where I needed to be. Here? I looked out the window to see every damn star in the sky. Shit. I should have looked for his keys. Maybe I could drive to the nearest town.
I went back to the closet and looked for my bag. He wouldn’t have packed a bag for me without my tools. Would he? The hangers screamed across the metal rod and the clothes swung back and forth as I tried to find it.
There was nothing. Next, I stormed over to the bed and dropped to the floor. I crawled around the whole thing looking under the damn thing. Nothing. Where was the bag? Where were my knives? Where was anything I needed?
I stormed back out and passed Parks. He paused.
“Halle. What are you doing?”
I stormed around the house and found the familiar glow of Richard’s light. I headed into what must have been a sitting room or something.
“Hey, Dick. Did you see where you’re worthless ex-step-daddy put mommy’s tools?”
I walked over to where he was sunning himself. At least he looked happy.
“Halle? What are you doing?”
I stormed around the room, looking for the light switch.
“Where are my tools?”
The floor creaked with every step he took to mimic and follow me. He tried to keep up or rather, head me off.
He grabbed me, and I punched him in the nose.
“Fuck, princess. What is going on with you?”
I stopped long enough to realize I was breathing heavily. The air was thick here. That was it. I couldn’t seem to calm myself. I couldn’t stop. The entire house was too small.
My skin itched.
I couldn’t scratch hard enough. I couldn’t make my heart stop trying to beat right through my rib cage.
“No. No. No. Move. You need to move. I need my tools. I need to let it out.”
I shook off the hand around my waist. He hadn’t let go of his nose yet, so it wasn’t too hard to shake him off. I didn’t really care. I couldn’t care. I couldn’t see anything right now.
My chest hurt. My hands shook, and my legs wanted to either run, or maybe I needed to kick something.
I left the room and nearly ran through the hallway. I just needed out. I needed the door. I couldn’t stay here.
“Halle, where are you going?”
His words registered but I couldn’t answer him. I didn’t even know why. I didn’t know why I couldn’t stop myself. But I couldn’t.
The second my fingers gripped the doorknob I yanked at it, and it wouldn’t budge.
No. I was trapped. Stuck. Logic said that this wasn’t what I thought. That I could get out. The panic rising inside me like a dark serpent, wiggled its way through me like the poison it was and crippled me from the inside out. It was too deeply rooted.
“Halle. Stop. What are you doing? Stop.”
I couldn’t stop.
“I need my tools. I need out of here. I need to leave. I need—”
