Page 61 of A Kingdom of Fire and Fury
“Well, I like you better when you’re not lying to yourself.” I folded my arms. “This side of you isn’t a total jackass.” Just like the side of him that took me to see the father trees.
He huffed a laugh. “A dangerous thought. Fine. What do you want me to play?”
A number of tavern songs came to mind, but none of them seemed good enough. That need rose up once more. I wanted to know him, to unravel him. I wasn’t lying before. The hopeful dreamer in him, I could follow behind, even if it was naïve. “Whatever your favorite piece is.”
His gaze lingered on mine before he nodded. He lifted the violin to his chin and closed his eyes. A slow melody rang out around the room. And just like that, he completely had me in his thrall. This was the real Kieran Caddel underneath all the masks and manipulations. Both a fierce spirit and a delicate soul. A dreamer and a warrior. The melody resonated the duality of him.
He looked ethereal. The moonlight cast a halo on him. The shadows curled around him, like a dangerous caress. Even his eyes seemed to glow behind his eyelids. It struck me then, how monumental this moment was. I could slit his throat if I dared. But I didn’t want to. It’d been a while since I truly wanted to harm him.
How many have seen this side of him?
I blinked when the music stopped, and a wall shuttered behind his eyes.Beautiful. Breathtaking.ButI couldn’t say anything like that. “I’ve never heard that song before.” It was the easiest thing to say, an almost nonanswer. But it was better than telling him my heart wouldn’t stop beating so fast I was sure it might explode.
Kieran lowered the violin from his chin. “You wouldn’t. I composed it myself.”
My eyes widened. “It’s a nice piece.” Another safe response. “When did you learn how to compose?”
Kieran loosed a breath. “Part of my noble education, I’m afraid. Though I went beyond what was required. It was one of the few subjects I could excel at without raising my stepmother’s ire.” His smile was soft as he looked down at the instrument. “It was something that was solely mine.”
It makes so much sense.Looking at him, I could almost see that little kid yearning for approval, not yet capable of building a mask. “The song was beautiful.” My heart thudded. This was different from the trip to the father trees. That could’ve been easily excused as a manipulation on his part—a way to keep me out of the dragonsguard’s investigation because they didn’t trust me. And of course, in that moment, I had felt grateful because I thought Kieran was merely doing something nice. But in the end, the best way to trap a fly was with honey rather than vinegar.
That was why this night in Rafferty Tower changed things. Because I couldn’t deny the kindness Kieran showed me. This didn’t benefit him. Not really. There were so many other ways he could’ve distracted me without showing such a vulnerable side to himself. Icouldn’t deny the shift in my feelings toward him. It was terrifying. Intoxicating. I needed more. “I’m still not fully convinced you wrote it.”
He grinned. “I might be a liar, but I’m not a thief. Unlike some people.”
“Play me another song. Something you composed.” This side of him, I didn’t want it to end.
Kieran lifted the violin back to his chin and began to play. It started off angry and intense, the music bouncing off the walls. In between the anger was something softer, something sad and a little hopeful. The melody became tentative, almost like it was afraid.
I couldn’t take my eyes off Kieran as he swayed. His foot tapped to the beat, and his eyes remained closed.A work of art.Even when I was at my most angry at him, I couldn’t deny he looked like the Mother had personally and lovingly sculpted him. From his broad shoulders, thick biceps, and to the vein bulging on his left arm. His shirt was buttoned down, leaving his collarbones exposed.I want to bite it.Even his pointed ears—he looked otherworldly. Like a fae god.
He shifted and that’s when I noticed it. A swirling black tattoo, like his Rider’s Mark, resting just above his heart. “When did you get that?” I blurted. It wasn’t his Gift Mark. That was on his right hipbone—I’d seen that beauty during training one day.
The music came to an abrupt halt. “It’s nothing.” Kieran set the violin down and buttoned his shirt up.
I frowned. “If it’s nothing, then why not tell me?” I grinned. “Did you get it on a dare, is that it? What doesit mean?”
Kieran’s jaw flexed. “I’ll play you another song.” But this time, he kept up a wall the whole time. His eyes remained open, and his stance stiff. I lamented the loss. There was something so… addicting seeing him lost to his music and letting his guard down.
But I was nothing if not patient. Kieran didn’t say anything about stopping, and I didn’t want to leave this bubble of ours. Because as soon as I did, I’d have to think about the gryphons and William and me almost ruining everything.
Maybe Kieran felt the same and that’s why he continued to play song after song. When he finally put his violin down, my stomach flipped. “You should play more often. It’ll make people like you.”
He laughed, and the sound chased away the chill that had crept back up my body. “Do you have any hobbies?”
I snorted. “Hobbies are a rich man’s luxury.”
He rolled his eyes. “Everyone has something they like to do no matter their income.”
I had to fight my instinct to argue with him. After so long of fighting, we’d finally found some common ground, and I didn’t want to ruin it. So I thought back. While I loved a good pickpocketing spree, it didn’t count as a hobby, even if the thrill of succeedingwasfun. “I guess I like to sing.”
Kieran’s eyes glittered. “Sing for me.”
“Hell no.”
He raised a brow. “I played for you.”
My cheeks flushed. “It’s not the same.”
