Page 16 of Rules for Rule Breaking
Emmy waved her hands in front of Winter’s face, and she came to.
“Sorry, you’re dumping a lot of information on me. I’m still stuck on the Punnett squares,” Winter said. “I’m happy for you, though, Em. This is incredible.”
When Winter skipped eighth grade, she left behind all her friends and was never able to recover from the loss. She kept her head down for a year, waiting for her friends to join her in high school. However, when they did, they were all so different, and Winter felt like she was on the outside of an inside. Her visits to Halmeoni increased, she and Emmy became closer over the phone, and she threw herself into schoolwork.
She knew she couldn’t take Halmeoni to college with her, but she thought that at least Emmy would be by her side, something that had only ever happened in short bytes for the entirety of their friendship. There were so many things she wanted to do with Emmy in Boston, like shop on Newbury Street, visit the Harvard Museum of Natural History, and drink tea by the harbor. With Emmy so far away, their friendship could only remain as strong as the Wi-Fi signal.
The entire four years played out in Winter’s head like a movie. She imagined riding tandem bikes alone, intertwining her own arms together with ice-cream cones in each hand, and looking longingly at empty chairs. The loneliness she had always felt in Emmy’s absence was only tolerable because she thought there was an end to it. But now it seemed it would be permanent. Real.
“Are you sure you’re not mad, though?” Emmy asked. “You’ll be okay in Boston without me? Because I’ll hop on a plane if any of those little STEM boys steps out of line.”
“I’m just a little bummed. I thought this was our chance to finally live in the same city,” Winter admitted, resting her head on Emmy’s shoulder. “We’ve always talked about how we’d be Halmeoni and Nai Nai one day. I don’t see how that’s possible if we’re never together and never on the same page. Is this why you didn’t want to visit MIT? Is it because you always knew you weren’t going to college with me?”
Emmy took a deep breath, and Winter’s head rose and fell with it. “Win, I’ve never expressed any interest in going to college or even coming back to the States for that matter.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I did. But you always told me I was having cold feet,” Emmy replied. They sat, embracing, in silence for a moment, watching the sky darken and more lightning bugs flicker in the distance.
“Are you absolutely sure this is what you want to do?” Winter asked.
“No, but it’s the only thing I’ve been excited about since Nai Nai.”
Winter was speechless for a moment. When Winter’s grandfather died, all the adults in her life were so sad and treated Winter like she was sad as well. At the funeral, Winter held on to her father’s pant leg and looked up at all the somber faces. The only time anyone met her at her level was when they knelt into deep bows. She had no idea what was going on. She’d seen Harabeoji only a week before, maybe even a few days. And then soon after, Halmeoni packed up the house and moved into the senior community. Sitting on a curb alone, Winter watched boxes of Halmeoni’s stuff, and only Halmeoni’s stuff, enter the apartment. Winter feltlike she should search for Harabeoji but didn’t know where. That’s when Emmy came along, offering Winter a chocolate-dipped biscuit stick. Together, they ate Pocky and looked for Harabeoji until the streetlights turned on. Even though the girls were only six, Emmy somehow knew what Winter needed in that moment; she needed to see for herself that Harabeoji wasn’t anywhere Winter could find him so she could finally understand the sadness around her. With it being her turn to be there for Emmy, Winter didn’t even know what to say. Everything she could think of was either too morbid or too cliché.
Winter looked out over the apartment complex, which used to seem so much bigger when she and Emmy were small. Now that she was soon off to college and leaving her childhood and her home behind, the world was growing too large too quickly. She feared this place she used to believe was her universe would shrink into nothingness. She was desperate to cling to the memories the two had created here.
“Do you remember how Nai Nai used to have us step on her back when we were really little?” Winter asked.
Emmy laughed. “Yeah, and she’d bring us a new snack every ten minutes.”
“But then she’d pinch the fat around my ribs. She didn’t know a lot of English, but she did know the word ‘chubby.’ ” Both girls giggled at the hypocrisy. “I really miss her,” Winter said.
“Yeah, me too.”
“I’m going to miss you too.”
“Nothing is going to change,” Emmy said, but by her tone, Winter could tell she barely believed her own words. Winter had already started to feel something was off. Usually when Emmy was in town, they would have to be unzipped from each other. But thissummer they had only hung out a handful of times.
The two uncoiled from each other and remained quiet for a long while. Winter wrapped her arms protectively around herself as she figured out how to make eye contact with Emmy, who had similarly tensed up right next to her. Emmy suddenly reached over to Winter and pulled their bodies together again. It made Winter tear up. She nestled into Emmy’s collarbone, and Emmy hugged her tighter.
Finally, when the mosquitoes started to make their appearance, Winter and Emmy said good night and went their separate ways.
Bobby Bae
6. WE REALLY WILL NOT DISCUSS EACH OTHER WITH OUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY
It had been two weeks since Bobby Bae’s girlfriend dumped him. The first few days, he barely left his bed. He’d watched three full seasons ofRiverdalewith his blackout curtains drawn. After that, he did get out of bed occasionally, but only to take comically long showers. He’d lean his forehead against the wall under the hot stream until it turned cold. Because of the excessive bathing, his eczema flared up, so he was back to lying in bed, in the dark.
Mr. and Mrs. Bae left him to it at first. They had always known their son was a... deep-feeling person with emotions perhaps more accessible than their own. Space usually did the trick for them, but Bobby rarely went even a day without talking to his friends. A full two weeks mourning a relationship with a girl they didn’t even particularly like was where they drew the line, so they called in reinforcements.
“Bobby,” Diana said as she opened the door slowly to her son’s room. “What are you doing, honey?”
Bobby was lying flat on his back in darkness.
“Netflix asked me if I was still watchingRiverdale,” he replied.
“You finally got tired of it?”
