Page 60 of The Forgotten SEAL
“A bitch, though?” Smith asks, lips pressed in a firm line. He raises one brow in question.
Kissing Poppet one more time, I plop her back on the bed and brush her white hair off my dress. Walking toward Smith, I say, “My grandma always told me to dotwo things in person. Give bad news and apologize. Both of those probably needed to happen, and I called him instead. I broke up with him by way of a phone call on the night we were planning on having sex for the first time.”
His eyes just about bulge out of his head. He runs a hand through his hair and shakes his head. “Shit, Carina. TMI. I have visions of you that are so disturbing that I could commit murder right now.”
I slide my hands around his waist as he slips his hands around me. “I didn’t want to, but that’s usually part of moving on. He…was a good guy. His timing was unlucky, and his selection was faulty.”
He kisses me on the top of the head. “We should go. Before my thoughts shift to me having sex with you instead of some dude named Ben.” He thrusts his hips forward so I feel his erection. “Oh, wait. They’ve already rounded that corner and decided to take a detour to Blow Job Street, too.”
We laugh. I kiss his neck. He groans. I melt. We make it out to his truck. Barely. He knows as well as I do that we need to talk. It’s been a long time since we’ve had any kind of relationship, let alone a sexual one. The guards at the security checkpoint by my house know him now. They wave him on, and we’re parking his truck in the empty lot just as the setting sun turns the sky a vibrant pink and red.
Smith tells me he wants to go to our tree—the onewith the gangly roots that protrude through the ground like angry waves at the beach. It’s a bit of a walk, but it’s so silent and the night so temperate I’m happy to be outside. Especially with his hands wrapped around me.
The tree looms before us. Tall and old, leaves and roots untouched by the disaster that is our new world. I suppose I thought it would look different after all this time and after everything that has transpired since our last visit. “It’s beautiful,” I whisper. Smith nods in agreement and takes my hand in his. I have our park blanket tucked under my arm.
The last rays of today’s light beam on the trunk, and it’s a sign. Some insane, unpredictable sign that we are where we’re supposed to be. Right now and forever. We sit down next to a tangled root that has several other ones fused around it and stare off in the distance. The top of the old church is visible above the treetops, almost disappearing with daytime.
“It’s where it started,” Smith says, leaning back on his elbows. His whole demeanor has shifted. A calmness—a fragment of peace that wasn’t there any time I’ve seen him since our separation.
“Don’t tell me it’s where it ends. I don’t take the Romeo and Juliet comparison literally, you know?”
He pulls me toward him. My head finds his chest—his heartbeat.
“I missed you so much, Smith,” I whisper.
“Miss isn’t even the correct word.” He clears histhroat, emotion already taking over. “I didn’t feel like I belonged anywhere. Nothing made sense. I held onto an old promise because it was all I had that made sense. I lost myself more when I lost you than I did when I lost my memory. I’m sorry.”
I roll on top of him, straddling his hips so I can look down and see his eyes. “Don’t apologize anymore. Make me promises instead. Those mean more.”
“I’d promise you anything right now. Not just because you’re sitting on top of my dick either,” he replies.
I smile. “Can you promise forever?” My voice shakes as I ask a question I never dared to ask of anyone else.
He sits up, a smile beaming bright on his beautiful face. Grabbing my face, he kisses me once, then again. Once more just to taste me, and I sigh in contentment. “Marry me,” he orders. “Take my name and let’s make babies. They’ll make babies, and our love will live on forever, Carina. Marry me. Be the person you want to be. And I’ll be happy to be by your side for as long as we have left on this earth.”
I snort an ungodly awful noise as I’m trying to conceal my tears and emotion. Kissing the side of his cheek, the scarred one, I lean into his ear. “Only if you’ll walk me down the aisle,” I reply.
He leans away to look at me. “Is that a yes?”
I nod. “Of course it’s a yes. I’ll marry you. I’ll make babies with you. I’ll love you forever. You’re the onlything in this world that gives me hope. The world could crumble around me…literally, but if you’re with me, I’ll be happy.”
Smith hugs me, and the embrace turns lethal when he kisses my ear and then my neck. I lean back to give him access to my collarbone and the front of my neck. “Are you okay right here?” he asks, his words a rush of breath and desire.
I kiss him as an answer. He lies down and takes me with him on top. “No one is outside right now. The curfew is good for something,” I reply. It wouldn’t have stopped me anyway.
“I want to make love to my fiancée, but I’m so excited I’m not sure what I’m about to do to you will be construed as love. You understand?” he asks, his hands unzipping my dress quickly.
I slide the dress off my shoulders to expose my lacy bra.
“You want to fuck me,” I say.
He grins. “My god, yes.”
Darkness conceals us, but not so much that we can’t see each other clearly. I take his T-shirt off slowly so as to not harm his hand. His smile is lustful but steadfast. He can’t stop smiling. Standing over him, he slides the dress and my panties off with gentle fingers. Being naked outdoors feels free. It feels naughty, the wind and air meeting places clothing is supposed to touch instead.
When his jeans and underwear are down by his ankles, I position myself between his knees and lean down, butstop right before I put him in my mouth. “This first?” I ask.
“You’re trying to kill me with anticipation. Yes, yes, this moment right here is what my dreams are made of. Not so much the blow job itself, but you right there, eyes looking at me, mouth ready, my cock hard. This. Snapshot,” he says then groans. “Don’t wait anymore, though.”
