Page 46 of Stealing It
Chapter Seventeen
Aidan
IT FEELS LIKE THEwhole town is at her funeral. It’s standing room only in the old, Baptist Church. I lean my back against the wall, keeping my palms pressed on the chair rail to stay grounded, so I don’t do anything stupid. My brothers are beside me, finally. We are a team, standing watch as the service rolls on. Kendall catches my eye briefly before dabbing a tissue against her eyes and refocusing her attention to the front of the church. My stomach lurches when I hear my name mentioned again. They call me a hero. A person in the right place at the right time. A brave, selfless man who saved Kendall’s life. They said had I not taken her out of the building when I did, she wouldn’t have made it—the smoke inhalation would have claimed her life. She recovered quickly as young people tend to do, in and out of the hospital in a few days. As the speaker drones on, I turn my gaze to my feet, the left one in a brace from the foot sprain that I thought was a break in my smoke induced haze. The words are meaningless when my soul is screamingfailureevery other heartbeat.
Saving Kendall wasn’t enough. I am of the most elite class of individuals—so few can compete at my level. Not even professional athletes, and yet I couldn’t save Magnolia. No one would ever dare ask me out loud. But I see the questions in their eyes.You couldn’t save them both? Why didn’t you save them both? Why didn’t you take Magnolia out of the shop and go back in for Kendall? You’re a SEAL. You could have saved them both. Why? Why?I won’t say it was impossible, because if I had been on time, I could have had them out of there in no time flat. Blaming Polly got me nowhere. Blaming Leo didn’t either. The string of decisions and choices led me there, at that time, that fateful night and we live with the consequences of our actions. Sometimes the consequences are far more severe than you’d expect. I’m used to life or death scenarios. This death takes away my breath and I’m still waiting to get it back.
Everyone filters up to pay their last respects, filing into line in the center aisle. The same aisle used almost every Saturday in the summer for a white wedding. My feet feel like lead as I cut the same path as those before me. When it’s my turn, the pastor smiles at me. “Thank you for your service, son. The world is better because you’re in it.”
My throat, which still aches when I swallow too much food, clogs with emotion. I shake his hand and nod instead of giving a verbal response. Faulty electrical wiring caused the fire. The window display was connected to an outlet that isn’t typically used, and the heavy load was too much for the bad wire job. There is nothing left of Magnolia’s Steals but for a pile of black ashes. The charred remnants are a painful reminder of everything Bronze Bay has lost.
There is a line of her crew to the right of the casket and I shake hands with each and every firefighter in her unit. The unit that arrived on the scene of the fire at the same time I saved Kendall. The woman, Andrea Sinclair, the hero I couldn’t be, saved Magnolia Sager and perished in the fire. A support beam fell directly on her head moments after she brought Magnolia to safety. It was tragic and…it was my fault. I should have gotten Magnolia out of there before the beam fell on her.
“Thank you so much,” I whisper, my voice a crackling, harsh grate. There was nothing from that night I remember after I collapsed, desperate for oxygen. These men and women before me took over. Truly saved the day…and Magnolia’s life.
The last firefighter nods and shakes my hand, his face a grim representation of what he’s lost. Gazing back at the coffin draped in the American flag, I’m struck with the memories of all the funerals I’ve attended in the past. Funerals for my brothers at arms. Deaths at the hands of bad guys, accidents, cancer, stray bullets in training, and explosions. Years and years of mortality that grind on my heart and steal my breath. This is no different. I thank Andrea once more, under my breath, for saving my heart, and then leave the church through the side door.
The attendees are mingling, sharing memories of The Bronze Bay Fire Department crew, friends and family passing happy memories of the fallen hero. I gravitate toward my men, the ones in the same uniform as me, and fall into conversation. They pat my shoulder and try their hardest to give just the right amount of empathy tinged with humor. Not too much because then they’ll make me feel bad, too little and they’re fucking jerks. SEALs are known for their chameleon personalities. We’re almost psychopaths. The key word beingalmost. We are charismatic, type A, alluring, perfectionists. We zone in on things that interest us and we obsess. We are cutthroat in competition, can file away emotion like a mundane, everyday chore. It’s borderline only because we don’t possess the bad qualities true psychopaths harness. Needless to say, our condolences don’t sound the same as most other people’s.
I check my watch. Only one hour until visiting hours begin at the hospital. One more hour until I can sit by Magnolia’s bed. Hold her hand and try not to cry in relief that she’s still breathing. Her recovery is slow moving due to the fact she broke both her legs and was unconscious for a long period of time.She will be okay. She will be okay.
A hand clamps on my shoulder from the back. “Hey, man. I’m glad she’s going to be okay. They just told me she’s going to start walking soon,” Leo says, hiking his thumb to another group of SEALs. My blood begins pumping when I see Leo. It’s hard to separate facts when there’s so much fury flowing in my body. I’m angry mostly at myself, but Leo comes in a close motherfucking second. “I’m sorry about everything.”
I swallow hard. “I don’t want to get into this with you. Don’t apologize.”
He holds up his palms. Scared I’m going to throw a punch. Again. “I would never want to hurt them. Either of them. You have to know that.” I know that. The cause of the fire was one of the first things I asked about at the earliest opportunity.
“Could have fooled me, man. What did you think it would do to Magnolia to move in on her daughter? To break up her relationship? Both things are pretty hurtful. Although your definition of fucked up might be different than mine.”
“Polly asked me where you went and I told her. I’m telling you, man. I didn’t send her there. That time it wasn’t malicious.”
That time.This guy is such a douchebag. “Whatever, man. You’re moving to Harbour Point and I’ll never have to look at your face again.”
Leo shifts on his feet, uneasy, his gaze darting away. “Out with it, prick. What else could you possibly have to say?” My tone is sharp, but I’m careful to keep the words just between us. “I have to go.”
He licks his lips. “Kendall,” he says, finally looking in my direction. “I, ah, really like her…as a friend.”
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath. “Are you hoping for my blessings, because they ain’t coming. Not ever. Not even when she is old enough to make those decisions on her own. Over my dead body.”
“It won’t be your choice soon,” he says. “I am only two years older than her. You’re being irrational.”
I clear my throat and wonder why I didn’t break his nose again when he opened his mouth. That’s right. I’m at church. “There’s no such thing as irrational. Only your ability to understand my rationale. I don’t care about the age difference. You’re a prick and I’ll never trust you.”
“We’re just friends, man. That’s it. I wanted to see her once more before I leave for Cape Cod.” Leo glances somewhere over my left shoulder, and my gaze immediately follows. Kendall is hugging the pastor and pulls back to talk to the pastor’s wife.
“You’re seeing her right now, aren’t you? Get the fuck out of my face,” I growl, rubbing my knuckles across my mouth. “Make yourself scarce, man. That goes for me and mine.”
Leo grabs the back of his neck and rubs furiously. “At first I wanted to piss you off. I admit it. I saw Kendall down at the beach after you told me to stay away from Magnolia. The reason I first spoke with her was be an ass, but I ended up enjoying…her company. Someone to talk to that wasn’t someone I worked with or was trying to fuck.” I step toward him, but he holds up his hand. “Just listen.” I should clock him and leave him for dead, my breaths come quicker. “She talked to me and asked for advice. I gave it.”
“Yeah, fucker you told her to lie and break up a relationship. Some friend you are. You really are on the same wavelength as a kid, aren’t you?”
He swallows hard. “I’m telling you it’s platonic. I swear. I’m sorry for everything. Truly.”
I tell him he should have found a friend his own age, someone outside of my territory, trying to be as rational and church-like as I can possibly manage to be as infuriated as I am. Leo nods as I throw him truth bombs and he apologizes once more before I’ve had enough.
I take a few steps back without breaking his gaze and walk up to Kendall, putting my arm around her to guide her to the car. The conversation with Leo has me shaken. He had the ability to destroy my life once, I hope he doesn’t do it again because I’ve pissed him off. Time is on my side. He’ll be gone soon. Good riddance. If I never see that fucker again it won’t be too soon.
The ride to the hospital is crisp with the windows down. Kendall remains quiet, leaning her elbow against the open window, hanging her head halfway out. She reaches out to turn the volume down on the radio and rolls her window up. I follow suit. “Thanks for being here for me right now,” she says. “This whole situation is awful, and you and Jenny are the only things that have made not having my mom bearable.” It’s only been a few days and several car rides to and from school. I’d do far more for her. “Especially because I was wrong about you.”
