Page 79 of The Not So Super Hero
Zane glared at Natalia.She ignored the attention to skip towards Chris.His brows furrowed, obvious confusion that was never answered when Natalia linked arms with him to drag him away.
“What do we need to talk about?”Nate asked, arms crossed and gaze shifting between Zane and the exit.
“Nothing,” Zane spat, getting up with a heavy sigh.
“You know if we don’t talk and she finds out, she will kill us.”
“I’ll take my chances.”
Nate rolled his eyes.“Whatever, run away again.I don’t even care anymore.”
Nate stalked off, ramming his shoulder against Zanes when he walked by.Grunting, he rubbed his shoulder.Nate’s figure retreated towards the door.Zane’s teeth came out to bite at his bottom lip.His gut twisted and churned with the force of a typhoon.Each step Nate took made Zane feel a little worse.
“I don’t know where to start,” Zane called just when Nate grasped the doorknob.
Wide-eyed and slack jawed, Nate pivoted on his heel.Silence enveloped them, broken by his careful steps towards Zane.He blinked rapidly, like dirt had gotten caught in his eyes.Then he settled in front of Zane to whisper, “It doesn’t matter where you start as long as you start.”
Zane hesitated.His hand massaged his shoulder.“I’m tired of everyone claiming they aren’t angry with me when they actually are.”
Nate scowled.“What do you mean?”
“You’re all playing nice when I know you have something to say.”
“What do you think I have to say?”Nate crossed his arms and cocking his brow.He looked ready for an argument, which was likely going to happen.
Zane wasn’t sure he wanted to answer or hear Nate’s answer.Shifting his weight, he quietly replied, “I don’t know.That you hate me, that you think I’m scum, something along those lines.”
“Not even close.”Nate shook his head, earning himself a disbelieving look.“I’m disappointed.When we were at Raiffel, you were always trying to get us out.You always had a plan, and even after each one failed for so many years, you got right back up after all the torture and torment and tried again.I wasn’t the only one that looked up to you.Everyone did because you gave us all hope that we could be more than lab rats.”
Zane bit so hard into his lip that he tasted blood.He couldn’t face Nate, the disappointment would break him.
“And what makes this harder is that I understand.I do.Isaiah’s death was—”
Zane flinched, almost whimpered.He slipped into a defensive stance like that would protect him, arms crossed and head lowered.
“Isaiah’s death wasn’t your fault,” Nate said.
“Bullshit,” he spat.“How can you even say that?”
“Let me finish,” Nate hissed.“When the chance came that we could get out of there, you curled up into a ball like a coward.You stayed in your room and waited it out while others fought to get out.If you had helped, things would have been different!”
“You sure are putting a lot of faith in me,” Zane scoffed.His hair fell into his face, shielding his anguished expression.“There’s no guarantee my help would have changed anything.”
“That’s not the point.The point is that you ran when we needed you most!You built us up, only to turn your back.Isaiah trusted you to get us out.He died in vain.You ran away, and that’s all you’ve been doing.By now, you should realize that it hasn’t gotten you anywhere and it never will.”
Died in vain.That stung more than Zane cared to admit.Although he always felt that way, and had always been himself up for it, hearing it out loud hurt a thousand times more.His lungs constricted.The room grew smaller.His hands shook.Nate reached for him.Zane took a stumbling step back.
Nate’s hands fell listlessly to his side.“I’m sorry, Zane.I shouldn’t have said that, I just…”
The two fell into a soul-crushing silence, but Nate made no moves to leave.He ruffled his hair, and gazed about the room, waiting for Zane to speak.
“I’m sorry,” he finally replied, voice shaking as he brought his hand up to tug roughly at his hair.He clenched his eyes shut and took a deep breath to calm his nerves.“I know I should have done something.It was-it was just hard and…”
“I know.It’s why I don’t like talking about it.”Nate took another chance, stepping forward to rest a hand on Zane’s shoulder.He gave it a reassuring squeeze.“I understand.It frustrates me even more that I do, but I’m still fucking angry and it doesn’t make me miss Isaiah any less.”
Zane missed him, too.
“I shouldn’t have ignored you guys after we left Raiffel.We should have kept in touch,” Zane mumbled.
