Page 103 of The Not So Super Hero
Present
A deafening silence lingered in the room.Zane’s trembling hands itched at his arms that were crossed defensively over his chest.Tears welled in his eyes.
Bailey sat motionless and speechless with his hands twisted together in his lap.His cheeks were damp from his own tears, while his lips couldn’t seem to decide whether they wished to stay open or closed.What could Bailey say that didn’t sound like something straight out of a self-help book he skimmed in the library and didn’t understand?Hearing the truth was far worse than he ever imagined.What would he have done in Zane’s place?Would he have survived that?
And Bailey realized perhaps that was the best place to start.The others had to have told Zane it wasn’t his fault, but he didn’t believe them.His guilt wouldn’t let him forgive himself.Bailey probably wouldn’t forgive himself either, but there were even more issues than forgiveness.
“You don’t give yourself enough credit,” he said.
“Enough credit?”Zane whispered, sounding almost offended.“Credit for what?Credit for hurting the woman I viewed as a mother?Credit for beating my best friend to death?”
Zane bit his lip, drawing blood.“It wasn’t quick.It wasn’t painless.He was scared and I didn’t stop.”
“Don’t,” Bailey interrupted, reaching out to touch his cheek.Zane pushed him away, eyes narrowing almost fearfully.Bailey’s fingers felt stiff as he withdrew them, slowly resting his hand at his side.“Don’t relive it.”
“It’s impossible not to.”
“You know what I really mean,” he countered.“What you went through, most wouldn’t be here today after that.I wish I could say I understand, but I don’t, and I never will because nothing in my life could possibly compare to that.All I can say is that you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.”
Zane stared with a blank expression that soon distorted into one of confusion and pain.“Strong?Did you not li—”
“I listened.”Bailey gripped Zane’s hand.He refused to let go as pieces slipped into place of the puzzle that had been Zane.The dream, the nightmare he had at Zane’s apartment.Zane’s reaction after Sasha.His desire for the mediocre life.Bailey saw the picture clear as day.He held tight to Zane’s hands, so tight he feared he caused harm, but he refused to let go.
“I listened to every word,” he whispered.“And I know you’re going to bring up how you didn’t help your friends get out.”
Zane twisted his neck to the side, the mere mention of it causing him to physically shiver.
“But you did help.Who always fought back?Who stood up for the kids who couldn’t stand up for themselves?Who did something so difficult, heart wrenching and terrifying in order to save others, some he probably never even met?”
Zane wasn’t sure if he was meant to answer, so he didn’t.
“You did,” Bailey said.“You gave those kids hope, so when the time came that they had a chance to run, they took it.Natalia and Nate fought because they knew what you would have done and it’s why they have never actually been mad at you.There’s no doubt in my mind that everyone was thinking of you.You may not see yourself as a hero, but most true heroes don’t.”
Zane shook, incapable of keeping his attention on anything in the room.The look was unusual and unnatural on his pale features.Though Bailey was happy that Zane had opened up, he didn’t want to see him like this again.
“I know a few words will not help the pain that you’re still feeling, the pain we’re both feeling.However, when it gets too rough or you need to talk, I’m here,” Bailey added.
Zane knew that.He knew it for a long time, but hearing it made something shatter in his mind.The barrier had been there so long he didn’t know how to handle the feelings pouring out afterwards.There weren’t any words, none that he could form.
He pulled Bailey in for a hug, burying his face in the boy’s shoulder.Bailey smiled and held tight to the warm and comforting embrace.Warm tears dropped against his neck that he spoke nothing of.No words were exchanged because none were needed.Zane’s thanks and worries and sorrows were all shown in a single action that he desperately needed.Funny how the simplest of things could mean so much.
And when Zane pulled away, Bailey saw pure relief.An almost new found light to him, his eyes brighter than they once were.His lips had a natural upward tilt.While Bailey knew the nightmares would never go away, the guilt and the pain would always linger, at least Zane knew there was to help him through it.Just like Zane was there to help Bailey through his.
Resting his palm against Bailey’s cheek, Zane leaned in for a tender kiss that had both their hearts racing.He twisted his fingers into Zane’s hair, easing into a kiss that made his toes curl.They remained like that, gingerly kissing in a tender moment that let the world slip away and bury their reality for a moment so they could breathe again.
When Zane retreated, the air felt warmer.The tension had dissipated.A weight had been lifted from their shoulders, shackles broken at their feet.For once, they could both breathe.It was a feeling they would have to get used to, but neither felt it would take all that long to get used to honestly.
Then a soft sniffle echoed through the room.They snapped their heads to the side to find a snotty Nate, and barely keeping-a-straight face Natalia standing in the doorway.Zane’s eyes widened.Bailey blushed and shifted closer to him.Like a toddler, Nate wiped at his eyes and nose with the back of his arm.Natalia’s lips shook in a desperate attempt to scowl.It wasn’t working.
“You assholes having a moment and being all.”Nate waved his hand.“Open.You couldn’t have waited?I wasn’t in the mood to cry today!Fuck, are there any tissues?”
Bailey would have answered, but Nate and Natalia ran over for an extra large group hug Zane struggled against, and Bailey eagerly accepted.He had on idea who he was hugging with Natalia’s hair tickling his face, but it was nice!Eventually, Zane caved and let the hug happen.Deep down, everyone knew he secretly enjoyed it.Bailey was about to mention that their perfect moment would be even better if Chris arrived, but, hey, that already happened.
“Hey!”Chris shouted from the entryway.“Why was I not invited?”
No one needed to invite him because he was already making his way over to join the hug.Bailey wished someone could have gotten a picture, their one big happy family all cuddled together on a hospital bed.At least this memory would never fade.
“Why are we cuddling, by the way?”Chris asked, staring at the still sniffling Nate who had yet to find tissues.
