Page 89 of Breaking Emily's Rules
When he wokethe next morning, Stone didn’t say the first words that popped into his mind.I was wrong.He’d been so certain making love to her would have lost some of the thrill of that crazy balls-to-the-wall first time. Wasn’t it always that way? It certainly had been that way for him in the past. Just not this time.
She was breathing softly next to him, her legs entangled with his.
“You okay?” He kissed her temple softly, surprised at the tenderness that stirred in him.
“No. Okay is not a big enough word for the way I feel.”
He agreed. This was new. Different. And while he would rather have his balls roasted over a flaming hot fire than cop to it, he was a little bit worried. Maybe even a tad bit scared. The difference between him and Emily was that he and fear were well acquainted.
Over the years, they’d developed a kind of truce. They didn’t avoid each other. What was the damn point? Being an ever-present facet of his life meant he and fear would need to learn how to get along. And they had, for many years.
When he’d separated from the air force, he’d had a moment when he didn’t think he could idly stand by and watch his father wither away from the strong man he’d once known into a skeleton of a man. But he’d managed that. And every single day that he tried to somehow take his father’s place, there was that small fear that someone would find out he was a fraud.
And now he was forced to face the fact he was crazy about this girl. This made leaving a real problem. One for which he had no viable solution, because he had to go back. He’d be receiving his orders any day now, and she wasn’t even aware he’d been accepted back.
He had to tell her soon. But all he wanted was a few more minutes. A few more minutes to pretend that nothing else mattered but right here and right now with her. A few more minutes before maybe she’d start to see him like every other woman he’d left behind had. Because it mattered what Emily thought of him. It mattered too much.
“You know what I was thinking? Our first date was at a man cave.”
“I should have done better than that.” He kissed her shoulder. “In a way, though, you met my family that day.”
“It was perfect. I love feeling like I’m one of the guys.” She propped her chin on his chest.
“You could never be one of the guys, babe. I don’t sleep with the guys.” He let his hand dive under the covers, exploring. She shivered and the expression in her eyes grew soft.
“You know what I mean. Have you ever made love to another pilot before?”
What a dangerous question.Women. And what if his answer had been yes? As it so happened, he wouldn’t be lying to say no. He wasn’t even sure he’d ever made love before. Great sex? Yeah. But again, this was different.
“You’re my first.” Under the sheet, he tweaked her nipple. It hardened to a solid peak.
“Would you please stop doing that?” She put her hand over his, stopping the under-the-sheets play. “It makes it hard to concentrate.”
“So it’s working.” He went for her neck, licking and nibbling.
She laughed, but then she moved and gave him better access. “Stone?”
“Yeah?”
“I’ve been kind of avoiding getting my license.”
He stopped kissing and went up on one elbow. “I knew it. Why?”
She sat up, pulling the covers up to her neck. “I don’t know. It just feels like—the end of something.”
“It’s not. It’s the beginning.”
“Doesn’t feel that way. When I get my license, I guess I won’t need you anymore.”
“That’s the idea.”
“Aw, but I’ll miss you sitting next to me pretending you don’t care.”
She had him dialed, didn’t she? “And I’ll miss you sitting next to me, inappropriately saluting me.”
She smiled shyly, and something tugged in his heart. “You’re going to miss me, Airman. Admit it.”
She had no idea how much.He drew her back into his arms where it felt like she belonged.Careful with that line of thinking.Look where it had him so far. In her bed going against every standard he’d set up. He was supposed to be better than this. Stronger.
