Page 101 of Lessons in Love at the Seaside Salon
And there’s the way.
‘Don’t we, Paolo?’
‘Yes, of course,’ he says, her father who knows his place in this household: supporter of his wife and his daughter, never to question his wife in particular and his daughter only when his wife wants him to join her in it. Sometimes Josie wishes he would say what he really thinks. Or maybe this is what he really thinks and her thoughts are unkind.
‘We love you, my darling,’ he says. ‘We will take care of you forever.’
‘But I don’t want you to!’ Josie worries she’s yelling, although maybe it’s just because the house is so quiet. ‘I want to have my own place!’
Erin and Paolo look at each other.
‘But … why?’ her mother says. ‘Don’t you have everything you want here?’
‘I’m anadult, Mum. I need to leave home eventually.’
‘You didn’t behave like an adult when you –’ Erin stops, her cheeks bright red.
Josie hates her a little for saying that but also knows she’s right, even as she wants to make a point.
‘You didn’t treat me like an adult,’ she says firmly. ‘You made out as if having a boyfriend was the worst thing in the world. You hadn’t even met him. How could you know if it was bad or good?’
‘So this is about Brett? You want to live with him?’
‘No!’ Josie doesn’t feel ready for that. ‘I don’t even know where I’d live. I just …’ She sighs again. ‘I just want to see what it’s like.’
Paolo puffs himself up a little. ‘I don’t think we can allow this, Josephine.’
‘I’m an adult, Dad. You can’t allow or not allow it.’
She really wishes she could walk away from them, but she knew when she started this that she couldn’t and also that she’d want to. But it had to be done. She didn’t want to spend the last of her recovery pretending she doesn’t have plans for after it. She wants to spend that time making preparations for the life she plans to have once she can fully engage in it.
‘We need to think about it,’ her mother says, her version of not-allowing-it.
‘Fine, think about it,’ Josie says. ‘But I’m doing it.’
‘Josie –’
‘Mum, I’ve made up my mind.’
She sounds resolute, although what she said isn’t exactly the truth, because while shehasmade up her mind that she wants to move out, she’s less sure about how to go about it. That will come next. Perhaps she can ask Trudy or Evie for advice.
There is silence, and no one seems inclined to break it.
Then Erin pours some tea and sits down heavily opposite Josie.
‘We’ll talk about it later,’ she says, although she doesn’t sound convinced.
It’s a small victory, but also not a victory, because Josie doesn’t want to be in a battle with her parents. She wants them to be happy for her. She wants to be happy for herself. And for them.
When she moves out it will be a huge change for them all. It’s inevitable, though, and that’s the part she has to ease them into.
They all sit and drink tea, and Josie eats one biscuit only. There’s no more talk about anything other than Paolo’s work. It’s normal, and not. And they’ll all have to get used to it.
CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO
‘Billy, sweetheart, don’t push your food around the plate.’
Evie smiles at her only child in what she hopes is a loving-yet-firm way. Getting the balance right is one of the hardest things to do as a parent, she’s decided: you want your kid to know you love him but also that he needs to listen to what you say, because you’re the adult and he’s not and you need to show him how to grow up.
