Page 51 of Weekends with the Sunshine Gardening Society
Elizabeth pictures Olive sitting at the desk, telling Doctor Lopes he’s eating too many of the staff biscuits as she knits one,purls one. Moss stitch, she said it was. It looked laborious and didn’t give Elizabeth the urge to knit.
‘And the doctors?’ her mother asks.
‘They’re pretty good. Olive and Doctor Lopes bicker, but she’s his stepmother so I suppose it’s allowed.’
‘What’s this Doctor Lopes like?’ Her mother is looking at her expectantly, and Elizabeth knows why: she thinks Elizabeth shouldn’t spend too long on her own, that it won’t be good for her. So she’ll be thinking that Doctor Lopes might be a romantic prospect.
‘He’s fine, Mum,’ she says in a knowing tone. ‘Not interested in me.’
‘I bet he is,’ her mother says.
‘He’s not.’
‘How do you know?’
‘Mum.’ She nods in Charlie’s direction.
‘He won’t understand,’ her mother mutters. ‘Besides, you’re too lovely to stay on your own for long.’
‘Mum!’ Elizabeth says again, and sighs heavily. ‘It’s not just Jon I’m getting over. It’s his illness.’ She glances at Charlie, because maybe he won’t understand this either but maybe he will, and she’s either scarring him for life or she’s saying something he needs to hear. ‘Watching someone be sick like that, for so long … It’s like we have to recover from the grief of witnessing that. And then the grief of him dying is separate.’
She breathes raggedly, feeling herself getting upset. She hardly ever lets herself cry, and certainly not in front of Charlie. Or her parents. They need to think she’s strong too. She shouldn’t be their burden. As her mother pats her forearm Elizabeth hiccups to hide a sob.
‘We understand, darling,’ her mother murmurs. ‘We know you’re going to grieve for a while.’ Then she throws her hands in the air. ‘I guess I thought you should have a little fun as well. You deserve it.’
Elizabeth sniffs back the rest of her tears and fakes a smile. ‘I don’t think that’s true. Does anyone really deserve it?’
‘Of course they do!’ her father says. ‘And you more than most. All you’ve been through.’ He shakes his head. ‘It’s not right.’
There’s silence for a few seconds, broken only by the sound of Charlie chewing.
‘I miss Dad,’ he says quietly, eventually. ‘But it’s okay, Mum. You don’t have to miss him forever.’
He grins, like he’s said nothing serious at all, when what Elizabeth feels like saying in reply is,What if I want to miss him forever?Because she knows, truly, that there’s an ease to grieving. Her excuse to opt out of all sorts of things is built-in and unassailable. She doesn’t have to try to re-engage with life; not really.
‘Tell us about this gardening club,’ her mother says.
Changing the subject is something they’ve all become good at. When it becomes too heavy they talk about something else. Elizabeth can’t say she minds.
‘Society, Mum,’ she says. ‘It’s the Sunshine Gardening Society.’
‘Lovely! What do you do?’
For the next few minutes Elizabeth regales them with stories of Shirley and her machete, Barb and her immaculate hairdo, Lorraine and her mother-in-law. She doesn’t know as much about Cynthia and Kathy so there’s little to relay.
The distraction works, and by the time she’s ready to take Charlie home Elizabeth’s mind is on plants and she finds herself looking forward to next weekend.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
‘Hello,Cora.’ Lorraine’s mother is thin-lipped as she smiles her way into the living room.
Lorraine hovers nervously behind her, fully aware that Rose and Cora barely get on at the best of times. But with them both living on the Sunshine Coast it seems ridiculous to not have a family gathering from time to time, even if the kids pronounce the ideaboringbecause everything isboringand they’rebored.
‘Then read a bloody book!’ Lorraine had shrieked at Terry the other day after the umpteenth ‘I’mbored’ emanated from his metal-filled mouth.
Braces. They’re the latest thing she’s had to organise and pay for. Mike’s started doing some fishing in the early mornings to supplement their income because it turns out that a teenage boy can eat three times as much as the rest of the household and still say he’s hungry, plus he needs things like braces, plus he grows out of his clothes and shoes every three months.
Lorraine can only hope that Simon will grow the same way, so the gear she now has stashed away in the shed will fit him. Although he looks like he may be shaping up to be a small fella. Which doesn’t bother her but it will probably bother him. He’s insecure enough as it is these days.
