Page 116 of Weekends with the Sunshine Gardening Society
‘I missed myself more,’ Cynthia replies and Lorraine thinks that’s as good an answer as any.
‘Pat’s life kept going the way it was before Odette was born,’ Cynthia goes on. ‘Mine didn’t. And I didn’t expect it to be thesame – but I also didn’t expecthisto be the same. He didn’t even try to adjust to help me. And I was just … overtaken.’ She turns her head briefly towards Lorraine. ‘I’m sure you remember what that’s like.’
‘Yeah, but I had my mum to help. And …’ Lorraine doesn’t really want to admit the next part. ‘Cora was pretty good too. I don’t think your mum was around as much.’
Cynthia’s mouth turns down. ‘It was more that I felt like she didn’t approve of me having a baby at that age and she didn’t try to understand. She loved Odette – it was hard not to. But I felt like she didn’t love me any more.’
Another jogger goes past and this time there’s no BO, which is a relief, but he kicks up some dirt that hits Lorraine in the calves. Sheknewthis walk was a bad idea.
‘How much further?’ she mutters, and Cynthia laughs.
‘We’ve just started!’
‘Oh. Right.’
Lorraine tries to make the best of it by looking to her left, at the ocean and the stretch of Noosa’s Main Beach, with rolling waves that are so perfect it’s like they were ordered out of a catalogue.
‘I enjoy walking,’ Cynthia says, ‘but I really wanted to chat to you about something.’
She sounds so serious that Lorraine scans her memory for a clue: is Cynthia mad at her after all because Pat lent Mike money? Or did she do something in high school that Cynthia’s still worried about? Or maybe she did something silly last weekend while gardening. That’s entirely possible.
‘I want to buy Elizabeth’s house,’ Cynthia says.
Well, that makes Lorraine stop and she hears swearing behind her. Another bloody jogger. Don’t get so close, mate, if you don’t like surprise stops!
‘Why?’ Lorraine asks and continues walking.
‘She’s going to sell it regardless, by the sound of it,’ Cynthia says. ‘And we put all that work into the garden. I would hate for it to be destroyed.’
Lorraine can’t argue with that logic, but she also feels a twinge of protectiveness towards Elizabeth – would she feel weird about Cynthia buying her house? Can Cynthia even afford it? They don’t talk about money unless it’s Lorraine’s, and because Cynthia’s been living with Wilfred Lorraine just thought she couldn’t afford anywhere else.
‘And thanks to my divorce settlement,’ Cynthia continues, ‘I can pay cash for it.’
Lorraine lets out a sigh of relief – so that’s it!
Cynthia laughs. ‘You thought I didn’t have the money, didn’t you?’
‘Well …’ Lorraine shrugs.
‘I’ve been living with Papa because I wasn’t sure if I was going to stay.’
That makes Lorraine stop again, except this time she pulls to the side to do it. Just in case.
‘So you were planning to go again?’
She puts her hands on her hips because this makes her cross, it really does. Cynthia has been getting all involved in life around here, with the gardening and the chatting and whatnot. A person could presume she was staying for good. A person like Lorraine.
‘Not planning,’ Cynthia says. ‘I just didn’t know. Odette might have really wanted to get rid of me.’
Lorraine drops her hands and lifts her chin. ‘I’ll accept it.’
‘Oh – good.’ Cynthia laughs. ‘I was living and dying on your approval.’
‘Shut up,’ Lorraine says but she nudges her gently. ‘If you’re staying put that’s going to make my day. Month. Year. Possibly my life.’ She glances sideways. ‘I know my kids love me and Mum loves me, but they don’t know all the bad stuff the way you do. And you stick around.’
‘The bad stuff is just life, Loz.’ Cynthia wraps an arm around her and kisses her cheek. ‘And so is the good. And all of your stuff is interesting to me.’
Lorraine feels a little emotional, which is embarrassing when you’re in a public place, but no one’s looking so she lets a couple of tears roll down her cheeks.
