Page 40 of Wyoming Bodyguard
“To your shoulder,” she said, clarifying. “I won’t press. But I’m realizing it makes things easier when you let others carry a little of your burden. You’ve done so much to help me. I’d like the opportunity to do something for you.”
He debated what to say. He hadn’t opened up to anyone about his injury and what it had ripped away. Not even Reid understood the magnitude of what he’d lost.
But Lily would understand.
He wasn’t sure if it was his lack of sleep or the fact he wanted a deeper connection with Lily, but a sudden need to unload his emotional trauma pressed on his chest. “I’d like that, but maybe not while standing in the middle of the kitchen.”
She glanced around, her attention fixed on the unmade pullout bed in the living room.
“How about the table?” he blurted out before she thought about making herself comfortable on the bed. If that happened, he’d be hard-pressed to control himself. He definitely wouldn’t be able to focus on discussing painful memories he’d kept buried for so long.
She gave one long, slow nod. “That’s probably for the best.”
He took a step away from her, hoping the mounting tension between them would dissipate with a little space. “I’ll take those. Thanks.” Grabbing the peas, he headed for the two-person table and sank into the hard chair. Maybe he’d made a mistake. If he distracted her, he could forget about ripping open the emotional scab keeping him sane. “You never said what woke you.”
She grinned. “The thought of Eve’s apple pie. We never dug into it, so I planned to sneak out and take the whole thing into my room. I figured I’d eat as much as I could until I passed out.”
“Don’t let me stop you.”
She rummaged around the kitchen then carried the pie and two forks to the table. “Only if you help me.”
“I can never say no to Eve’s pie. Especially apple.” He drooped the cool bag over his shoulder and took the fork.
Lily uncovered the pie pan and speared a forkful of pie from the center of the tin. She slid the bite into her mouth and moaned. “Dear God in heaven, that woman is magical.”
Chuckling, he followed suit. Sweet bursts of cinnamon and apple exploded in his mouth. “All that’s missing is vanilla ice cream.”
She waved her fork at him. “Tomorrow, if there’s any left. Now let’s get back to you. What happened to your shoulder?”
The delicious dessert soured in his stomach, and he set down his fork. He sighed, not sure where to start. “As you know, I joined the marines straight out of high school. I love this town, but I wanted a chance to see a little bit of the world before I settled down and took over the ranch. The plan was to spend a few years serving my country, come home and help Pops until it was my turn to take over the ranch. But some plans are never meant to be.”
Concern wrinkled the corners of her eyes. She placed her fork on the table and reached for his hand.
Memories assaulted him like shrapnel. The smell of burning flesh and the sound of twisting metal took over his mind. He couldn’t let it suck him under, couldn’t get caught up in the vortex of fear and regret. He blew out a long breath and focused on the kindness that swam in her blue eyes.
She gave his hand a little squeeze. “You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.”
He steadied his nerves, finally ready to open up. “When I was overseas, I was in a tank on patrol. An IED hit the vehicle. Reid and I were both inside, along with our buddy Ben and one woman—Andrea. The tank rolled and caught fire. I pulled Reid out, but my shoulder was busted bad. Ben tried to save Andrea, but there wasn’t enough time.”
His throat closed and grief washed over him now just as fresh as the day of the attack. “I vowed to never leave a marine behind. I hate that I couldn’t keep that promise.”
Tears hovered over her dark lashes. “You did everything you could. It wasn’t your fault.”
“In my head, I know that. But I’ll always blame myself, just like Reid and Ben. We all carry that weight. But even after I left the service, when I hoped to come home and put it all behind me, I never realized I’d be forced to face another war. One I had zero control over.”
Understanding softened the planes of her pretty face. “Your shoulder. If one day of chores hurts this bad, I can’t imagine what a lifetime on your ranch would do. Is that why you sold your land?”
An internal debate waged inside him. He could tell her yes and leave it alone. Hell, she might even forgive him and his family based only on the knowledge he had an injury that limited him. Even if it wasn’t the entire story.
But the whole truth was hidden behind a secret he’d sworn to keep. A secret that now felt like a lie and was one he was tired of keeping.
* * *
The sharp ache inside Lily had nothing to do with her bumps and bruises. She ached for Madden’s pain—both physical and emotional. And she ached for the part she played in judging him without stopping and asking questions first. She should have known he had a reason for selling a piece of his family’s history, for making a decision that appeared hasty but was really one forced on him and hurt him deeply.
Madden slid his hand from beneath hers and flipped the bag of peas on his shoulder. “Part of the reason, yeah. I move slower. The work is harder. As you can see, even after one day I’m sore as hell. I’m surprised you didn’t notice earlier when I helped with chores.”
“I thought you were being lazy,” she said, winking to make sure he knew she was teasing. “Or just moving at a snail’s pace to mess with me.”
