Page 4 of Too Much In Common
She looked at Javier, who shook his head, still unable to talk. There was no reason for humor. He pinned someone he obviously should not have, even if she was hurling through the air at him.
The woman pulled the pink silicone bell thingy off the floor. “What are you doing with my menstrual cup?”
Menstrual cup? That could not possibly be what he thought it sounded like. “A what?”
“From the look on your face, you caught what I said. Didn’t you read the packaging?”
“There was none. Just a plastic bag with a barcode, and the words ‘Mens. Cup.’ Which is a terrible abbreviation for something not meant for men.”
She winced. “I must have checked the low packaging option.”
“Sorry, I had no idea...” Chris remembered his call to the service rep and picked up his phone. The screen showed the call had disconnected.
“Christian Ray Johnson, meet Christian Rae Johnson.” Javier wiped his eyes. “I never expected this...” He started laughing again.
“What?” the woman spoke at the same time as Chris.
“Tian... Chris... Honest. I had nothing to do with this...” Javier pointed to the box and the envelope.
Chris looked at the woman. “Do you know what he is talking about?”
“We have nearly identical names.” She glared at him. As if it was his fault. She must be at least a year or two younger than his thirty. Clearly, he had the name first. “You opened my package. I was going to feel bad for you since I opened your jury summons. Now, not so much.”
The paper she’d dropped. Where was it? The edge peaked out from under the couch. Chris picked up the envelope. “So you are also named Christian Ray Johnson? I’ve never met someone with my same middle name too.”
“I spell Rae with an E.” The pinched line of her mouth confirmed she was not a fan of their commonality.
“I wonder how our mail got mixed up?” Chris raised a brow in Javier’s direction.
“No, man, not me. One, it is a federal offense to tamper with mail. Two, I wouldn’t risk my job for a practical joke—although this one was amazing.” Javier wiped a tear from the corner of his eye.
Clearly, his roommate had more explaining to do after he gained control of himself. The situation wasn’t funny at all. He’d pinned a stranger on the couch. No matter how many times he replayed the last few minutes the result were the same. The impossible happened. Chris returned his focus to the woman. “Did I hurt you?”
She rubbed her wrist. “I’ve had worse. You’re security too?”
“Yes. Not for the building. Personal security. Which is why when you dove for me...” Chris recalled her words. Menstrual cup. Heat rose in my neck.
“I wasn’t reaching for you. You were playing with my...” Her face pinked as she held up the pink silicone object. “Feminine hygiene product.”
“The service rep was asking me to describe it. Since I hadn’t ordered it, I didn’t want to be charged... I saw you coming at me... Um, I owe you lots of apologies. I shouldn’t have immobilized you like that.” Overreaction of the century. He’d be lucky if she didn’t file charges. At least she hadn’t pulled the phone from the leg pocket of her nicely fitting yoga pants. Yet. Maybe he could minimize the damage. “I’m really not that guy.”
“What guy?”
“The type that uses force to control–or, I mean...” He started over. “I reacted when you dove for me. I wasn’t expecting... It isn’t your fault. I reacted without thinking. I am so sorry. I just—” Chris waved at the couch. It sure looked like he was that guy. Self-defense wasn’t abuse. The word-vomit spewing from his mouth couldn’t correct that.
Javier walked over. “I’m sorry too. I should have prevented this. And Chris is right. He isn’t abusive. Hastings wouldn’t put up with that for a second. Chris had an event-filled day. If I knew you were going to leap across the room at him...”
His roommate wasn’t helping. Chris looked her in the eye and put every explanation he could in the two words. “I’m sorry.”
“Never lunge at a bodyguard?” The corner of her mouth hitched up in a quarter smile.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “You probably shouldn’t lunge at anyone like that. You made yourself vulnerable...” He swallowed and shook his head. “Never mind. This isn’t a self-defense class.”
“You teach self-defense?”
“Sometimes.”
“Oh.” She looked in her box. “Well, I should go.”
