Page 24 of His Fresh Start Cowboy
“You don’t have to go through the extra trouble. A room at the house is just fine. So why’d you really call me?”
“What?” Brand picked up a piece of straw and turned it over between his fingers—a stalling tactic that didn’t work when his conversation partner was hundreds of miles away, instead of right in front of him.
“Whatwhat? You called me, dude.”
“Technically, you called me. I texted.”
“Pedant. What’s going on? Something besides worrying about Brutus?”
“Worrying about the ranch, I guess. Same shit, different day.” Close enough to the truth without lying. “Dad’s getting older and it’s hard to find good ranch hands right now. Working on a skeleton crew isn’t good for anyone but at least the herds are in good shape.”
“I wish I had some good advice for you, Brand, I mean it. But I left before I got too far into the management side of things.”
“I know, and I swear I’m not tryin’ to guilt-trip you or nothing. Honestly, I’m not sure why I called.”
“I’ll go out on a limb and say something’s bugging you that has nothing to do with the ranch, and you can’t talk to Dad, Rem, or who Rem refers to as that hot piece of ass named Ramie?”
Brand groaned. “You and Rem talk about my personal life?”
“Sometimes. I mean, all of us are married except you, little brother. It’s kinda hot gossip.”
“I’m too busy with the ranch to try and settle down with anyone.” True enough. But it was also a flimsy excuse for someone his age.
“Dad managed the ranch, marrying Mom, and raising five kids, so try again.” Growing up, Colt had always been able to sniff out Brand’s bullshit, and even over the phone, he wasn’t buying what Brand was trying to sell.
“Fine, there is someone I’m kind of interested in. I knew them a long time ago, and we’ve recently become reacquainted, but it’s complicated. I genuinely do not feel like I have time right now to pursue anything, but I also don’t want to stand back and risk them walking away before we have a chance to try.”
Colt was quiet for several beats, and Brand really wished he could see his brother’s face. “Does this person have feelings for you?”
“I think maybe, but I don’t know for sure. I’ve avoided having any serious conversations with them about it. I am lonely sometimes but I suck at relationships. I dated Ginny back in high school and managed to fuck that up. Dated a few girls in college, too, but I just...got bored. Broke it off.”
“You sure you’re sniffing up the right gender?”
Brand let out a long, deep breath that did nothing to soothe his unease. “No. Colt, I’m gonna tell you a secret that only two other people know.”
“I won’t tell a soul, I promise.” He sounded as if he knew what Brand was going to tell him, and he was probably half-right if he assumed Brand was going to say he was gay and in the closet. Brand was very definitely in the closet.
“I’m bi. Known it for a long time.”
“Thank you for telling me. I appreciate the trust. I’m going to assume the two other people who know aren’t in the family.”
“Definitely not.” When Colt came out to the family three years ago, Brand and Rem hadn’t really cared too much. Brand had been a little confused at first, but he’d also been carrying on with Jackson in secret, so he’d made a show of not quite understanding Colt being in love with a man. Their sisters had been a bit more standoffish, and their husbands quietly hostile about the whole thing. Last Christmas had been a little awkward at the Woods house with Colt and Avery there, but no one actively gave the pair shit.
Wayne Woods had laid down the law about that.
But the idea of coming out to his family as bi, not to mention maybe having feelings for his little brother’s former best friend, made Brand’s insides all kinds of squirrely. Like he’d swallowed a belly full of snakes.
“I do have a friend I’ve talked to about this a little,” Brand continued when Colt didn’t speak. “Ramie’s a good listener and she doesn’t judge, but she’s outside the family. I’m terrified of what Dad might think.”
“Speaking from experience, Dad doesn’t always understand but he loves us no matter what. He still doesn’t understand me loving Avery but he accepts that Avery makes me happy. If you’ve got feelings for a man and that man’s got them back, Dad will still love and accept you, even if he doesn’t understand it.”
“I know, I just...the ranch is in such a tenuous spot right now. With the transition to organic beef, our lack of staff, the wind farm...the last thing we need is a bunch of bigoted assholes boycotting us or worse, because they find out the foreman is queer.”
“Listen to you, using your big-boy words.”
Brand snorted. “I never did apologize for that, did I? Not really.” When Colt returned to the ranch, Brand had tossed the word “fag” at him several times, mostly out of sheer shock at learning the reason Colt left all those years ago was because he was gay. Their parents had never told the younger Woods siblings about Colt getting caught with another boy in the hayloft. Brand had been rude that day, and unnecessarily cruel in his own fear of his affair with Jackson being discovered.
“I forgave that a long time ago,” Colt said. “Water under the bridge and miles down the river. I just want you to be happy, man. That’s all.”
