Page 81 of How to Bang a Billionaire

Well, he did say he wanted me crying. Mission accomplished.

Fucking bastard.

They were the worst tears though: the kind that happened when somebody made you feel so utterly small, your body couldn’t cope with the immensity of your emotions anymore. And then they burst out of you in this rush of humiliation, fury, and salt.

I couldn’t even think of a fucking retort.

Nothing that would properly communicate my shock and betrayal. He’d used a moment of vulnerability against me when I was already vulnerable.

When I was making myself vulnerable for him.

Because I thought…oh who knew what I thought.

I walked away. And as I passed the dining area table, the roses threw back their heads and laughed at me with red mouths.

I picked up the vase, turned back to Caspian—who, of course, was as calm as fucking ever—and very deliberately let it slip between my hands.

The smash was epic. Glass and water and bloody petals.

For about 0.3 seconds, I felt better.

Then I felt worse.

And still Caspian didn’t respond. Just watched me with those high windows eyes of his: deep blue air, nothing, nowhere, and endless.

Fleeing into the bedroom, I locked the door and dived into bed. It was childish as fuck but I didn’t know what else to do since Nik had been right about me. I didn’t stick around in relationships long enough to reach the god-awful row stage. What happened now? Did I have to go back out there? Was Caspian supposed to apologize? Was I supposed to apologize?

Because that was never happening.

Weeping helplessly, I stuffed my head under the pillow so Caspian wouldn’t be able to hear. Was that how he saw me? One—admittedly fucked up—misjudgment and I couldn’t be trusted to know my own mind? That I was nothing more than a victim waiting to happen? Was that what people thought about Mum?

Movement in the hallway outside.

I went still as a rabbit, not sure what I wanted. Part of me wanted him to push his way in and apologize. Hold me and comfort me. Tell me he didn’t mean it. The rest of me would have bitten him if he’d come within range.

But, no. He was just leaving. His footsteps receded. Another door closed.

Taking advantage of having the place to myself, I let go and cried in earnest, with abandon. I really wanted to phone Nik but he was forty thousand feet in the air, somewhere between London and Massachusetts. Actually, he’d probably landed but Sobbing!Arden wasn’t exactly the welcome to Boston call he needed.

What was I supposed to do? I couldn’t exactly stay here after that. Whatever Caspian believed, I had some pride. Or maybe it was nothing but a misunderstanding and he would…fix it.

Except he’d just gone. But, then, so had I.

And I’d also broken a vase.

But he’d—

Arrgh. My head had gone all ouroboros. And I wasn’t quite sure where right and wrong began or ended anymore.

Just that I was angry and sad and confused and fucked up.

So, what with one thing and another, I wasn’t exactly paying much attention to time passing. But it was probably an hour or two later when I heard someone come in. And, even though I’d been lying there, swearing myself blue in the face that I was going to be a stone whatever Caspian did or said, and probably leave in the morning anyway, the possibility that he’d come back made my stupid little heart do the fandango.

Hurling myself out of the room, I crashed straight into one of the cleaners. Apparently he’d been called in to deal with a broken vase.

Which…y’know.

Of course he had.

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