What began with me being slightly hesitant to share our relationship and how we met around town has turned into something else. I want people to know. I want them to know that she matters to me. That she’s important. I want them to know that she’s the one who got me through everything.
She makes me feel prouder of myself. Where I camefrom, where I’ve gotten to now. Makes me feel like I have less to prove.
I didn’t realize that’s what I’ve been doing. Trying to prove myself. Trying to make myself acceptable. But in going over things with her, the way that I dropped out of college, the feelings I have when I win at the rodeo, when I go out and ride, I’ve realized the truth. I’malwaystrying to prove something, and when I was in school, I didn’t feel like I could prove it, so I quit.
For some reason my soul doesn’t feel that same restlessness now.
She makes me feel more settled. Makes me feel like I’m all right. I mean, she’s here with me, isn’t she?
I roll up to the front of the store, and she steps outside, waving goodbye to Allison.
“Did you have a good day?” I ask as soon as she gets into the truck.
Just looking at her makes me lose my breath. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to her.
“Yeah,” she says.
She looks slightly distracted. But happy.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I’m just thinking about things. Nothing bad. Just life.”
I wait to see if maybe she’ll share some of that with me, but she doesn’t. I’m not sure if she wants me to pry or not. I don’t press.
“I know you just got off work, but there’s a big get-together over at my uncle’s ranch. I was wondering if you’d want to come by.”
She looks at me, biting her lip. “That’s a lot of Dodge.”
“It is. You don’t even know. It’s going to be the entireDodge family, plus spouses, plus kids, and surrogate family, which includes my dad’s ex.”
“What?”
“Have I told you about Olivia?”
“No, but Kaylee did.”
“Yeah. Well, my dad dated this woman Olivia for a long while, and then she married a family friend, and I think all is well now. I mean, it’s been more than ten years.”
“I mean, it must be well if everybody all hangs out at barbecues.”
“They do. But yeah, my family is big, and it’s a lot of a lot. But they want you there. And I would love for you to come.”
She looks down. “I’ve never been invited to anybody’s family barbecue before. That’s really cool.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Really. I like the idea of being included in that.”
“Well of course you are. You are family, Sarah.”
I reach across the seat and take her hand in mine, and hold it the whole drive back to my uncle’s ranch. We drive underneath the sign, and she looks up, a strange smile on her face. “Get Out of Dodge.”
“Oh yeah. That’s the name of the ranch. Punny.”
“Yeah. Very.”
“I think my grandpa named it. I wish he were here; he’s great. He’s a livewire, even at his age. I never met my grandma, his first wife, but his wife is the best. She’s the only grandma I know, and I love her. It’s great when they come to visit, but they live in New Mexico most of the year. I know there was a little bit of family difficulty between Wyatt and him, especially, but they're fine. I just think they all get along better when they’re not living on top of each other.”