Page 41 of Love, Just In

‘The very same. They met before I even got up here. Small world, hey.’

Christina pauses. ‘Are you OK with them dating?’

The question catches me off guard. ‘Why wouldn’t I be?’

‘No reason. It just seems a little like muddying the waters or something. Your best friend dating your colleague.’

‘Well, how’s this for muddying the waters? I’mlivingwith Zac at the moment. But it’s just temporary; he basically rescued me from dirtbag Davide. At one point, I was worried that Zac was going to deck him.’

Christina makes a half-amused, half-horrified sound. ‘It sounds like I really need to come up there. I’m missing way too much.’

‘No, you sit tight and rest up. I’ll be down there soon enough for some shifts.’

‘That would be great, but I’d still love to meet this friend I’ve heard so much about but have never set eyes on. Are you sure he’s not a hallucination?’

I breathe a laugh. ‘Yeah, he’s been kind of elusive in recent years.’ My gaze skims over the stylishly decorated yet manly living space. ‘He’s not really the same guy I knew before,’ I admit. ‘He’s quieter now, more mature … I don’t know. Sadder, I think.’

Christina goes quiet.

‘It’s good for him to be dating someone,’ I decide. ‘Before he moved up here, he was engaged.’

She gives a sympathetic murmur. ‘Let me guess: she broke his heart?’

My chest contracts. ‘She died.’

‘Oh,’ Christina says, genuinely stricken. ‘Shit.’

‘Yeah, that pretty much covers it.’ Talking about this turns my skin cold, like I’m betraying Zac or something. He’s said so little about it to me, which is why I don’t generally bring it up with other people—not even Christina. But her gentle, compassionate breaths make me want to continue.

‘She died in a car accident. Zac was in the car with her.’

‘Oh no.’

My mind tears back to the phone call he made to me from the hospital that night, hyperventilating with so much panic and distress that he couldn’t speak properly.

‘What happened?’ Christina asks in a breath.

My voice pulls tight. ‘They were driving from Sydney down to Mittagong to spend the weekend at her parents’ place. She was driving, it was late, and they were on a dark highway. A car came flying around a blind corner from the opposite direction and crashed straight into them. Tara—that was her name—took the brunt of the impact, but Zac barely had a scratch. I’ve probably mentioned that he’s a paramedic?’

‘You have.’

‘So, he obviously didn’t have any equipment with him, but he would have triedsohard to save her.’ My voice cracks.

‘Oh, darling. I’m so sorry.’

I nod silently, trying to suck back tears that I feel like I’ve been holding in forever.

‘The other awful thing is that no one saw the accident,’ I continue shakily, ‘and because they were on a country road, there was no phone reception. So, Zac was trapped in that car with Tara for a couple of hours before anyone came to help them. He held her while she died.’ Tears slide down my cheeks as I press my eyes shut.

‘Josie,’ Christina says painfully, but it’s not me she should be worried about. I can’t even think about what that night must have done to Zac without my chest cleaving open.

I was there the moment he met Tara at that start-of-semester costume party.

I was at the student bar crawl the following week when he worked up the courage to guide a giggling Tara around the back of a building so he could kiss her.

I was at their Glebe housewarming party when they moved in together after uni, and I planned their engagement celebration three years later.

I was at Tara’s funeral, when the only person in the church who wasn’t crying was Zac, his cheeks hardened to two blocks of white marble, his eyes like sheets of glass.

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