Page 76 of Love, Just In

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My stomach churns all the way back to my chair, where I sit and wrap my cashmere shawl around myself like a safety blanket.

Zac drops into the seat beside me and gently sets his hand over mine. I feel like pulling away, but I don’t.

What am I even thinking?

Zacdidn’tchoose me when he sensed the option was there. If Tara hadn’t died, they’d be married now, and she’d be the one here as his wedding date.

I’m just the back-up plan.

He may be your best friend, but he’s still a guy. He already told you that he only wants to play the field, and you’re a hook-up in a pretty dress who’s basically been throwing yourself at him. That’s what this is.

I feel his eyes on me, but I slide my fingers away from his. I sense him stiffen as he drops his hand into his lap, the message received. We both stare silently at the dance floor, the truth growing over us like a storm cloud.

We should never have kissed.

Because how are we supposed to hang out together now with this strange, unbearable new tension between us?

Ross waves Zac over for something and he gets up with a sigh, assuring me he’ll be back. His palm sweeps over my shoulder as he leaves, but it only makes me feel worse.

‘I’m not sure …’

With my chest stinging, I pull out my phone and message Natasha Harrington. She’s been especially kind to me since the accident, and I make up a story about an urgent appointment in Sydney tomorrow, asking if I can please work from there for a couple of days. It’s a bold and risky move, but it’s one worth taking.

Because I just can’t be around Zac right now.

I’d thought it would be me, but webothmessed up. We shouldn’t have given in and crossed that forbidden line.

Even though it was the most heart-melting kiss of my entire life.

With my stomach tying itself in knots, I call an Uber.

CHAPTER 27

Seven years ago

‘I’m never getting married.’

My statement sends a stunned stare to Zac’s face, his skin bronzed and glowing from the Bathurst summer sun. ‘Since when are you against marriage?’ he asks.

The bartender hands us our beers, and I bend forward to slurp up a bit of the froth that’s bulging from my glass. Zac wrinkles his brow at this behaviour.

‘I’m notagainstmarriage,’ I clarify as we carry our drinks over to an outdoor table that’s built into a tree tangled with fairy lights. ‘I just don’t see it ever happening. I haven’t met anyone around here who’s decent, apart from Felix.’

Zac scoffs. ‘That fucking poser was the antithesis of decent. Plus, you don’t want to meet someone in Bathurst, do you? What happens after you graduate?’

‘The guy chases me to Sydney because he can’t live without me?’ I grin over the rim of my glass.

Zac’s chuckle sounds mildly irritated. ‘Whatever.’

‘What about you?’ I ask. ‘This could be the longest I’ve seen you go without a girlfriend. Are we finally having a drink named “loneliness” at the same time?’ I tease, referencing our favourite ‘Piano Man’ lyric.

‘How could I ever be lonely when I have you, sunbeam?’ he quips, tossing me a smug smile.

Zac sits back and runs his fingers through his Shawn Mendes–style curls, and I register that he looks pretty undeniably handsome tonight. His blue T-shirt that says ‘Don’t Meth With Me’ looks like it was made for his chest to model, and his sun-kissed skin is making the green flecks in his eyes take centre stage. I have no doubt that he could pick up any girl tonight without even needing to speak, but I don’t voice that because I’m greedy and don’t want to share him.

‘Is there an ideal time you would like to get married?’ I ask, continuing our conversation.

A bemused line hits Zac’s forehead. ‘Uh, when I meet the right person?’