Page 100 of Tender Offer
I let her go.
Chapter 49
Madison
Present Day
Preston
I miss you.
My thumb grazes over the message. Preston texted it today and has every day since I left London. Eleven messages with the same eight letters clawing deep at the hole where my heart used to be.
“Talk to him,” Kojo says from the corner of his studio between a tower of boxes piled to the ceiling.
I let out a long, audible breath and concentrate on the runway layout taped to the wall. “We should tweak the sequence and put Jordan before Andrew.”
“Regine.”
“Use this patch on the satin cape.” I point to the high-waist tuxedo suit on one of the mannequins. “People will go wild over the collar.”
“Enough.” I’m now shoulder-to-chest with Kojo. He cups my face and angles my chin so I’m looking him in the eyes. The frown creasing his brow wrinkles the lines in his forehead below a bun of dreads.
“I’m okay.” A bland half smile is all I have the strength for.
“You’re not, and that’s okay.”
“I’m fine, Kojo,” I huff. “This will look good under the lighting we chose.”
“You’re not okay, Regine.”
“Someone has to pack up the rest of your studio while you’re in Paris for the show.” Leave it to Kojo to plan a move to Austin while finalizing the runway show for his Rustin collection, “Utopian Promise.”
“I don’t give a shit about my show! You’ve been a zombie, working yourself to the point of exhaustion. You can’t block out what happened.”
“I’m not. There’s a job to do. I’m doing it.” I brush past Kojo with a choked laugh and head to the conference table that’s draped in fabric samples.
I’m never one to hate good fashion, but the cream crocheted short set and brown sandals in pursuit annoy me to no end. Kojo’s spring-summer collection is the only subject up for discussion.
“You know good and damn well that’s not what I meant,” he snaps, hands on his hips and neck ready to hula-hoop. “You have to let it out, Maddie.”
“I don’t want to feel anymore! Is that what you want to hear? That I stay up all night questioning if I made the right decision?”
Leaving London wasn’t a choice I made lightly. Preston was blindsided by the baby news and barely kept it together,especially with the CEO demands pulling him in every direction. I wanted to be there for him, and I was, until I was the one alone. Early conference calls turned into meetings that bled into the night. Bellamy’s position as CFO has her by his side around the clock.
Between his constant work and Bellamy’s pregnancy, there wasn’t a chance to figure us out. There are too many moving parts, and that creates uncertainty. The last thing I wanted was to add another puzzle for Preston to solve.
I love him, but I have to take care of me too.
“I tried sohardto be supportive.” I gulp at the sting of tears. The ache in my throat twists the last shreds of my control. “It hurts to breathe, Ko. I miss him every day. But I lost the strength to stay.”
I’ve cried myself to sleep every night. It hasn’t soothed the bitter taste of jealousy stirring inside me that another woman—a childhood friend he regards as family—is carrying his child. They were intimate weeks before he found his way to my hotel room door. It’s not a stretch to picture them figuring out a relationship beyond co-parenting, especially if I’m not in the picture.
I want to be stronger, to pretend their connection and new life bond aren’t eating me from the inside. But they are.
The high-pitched voice breaking through a strangled cry startles me. I don’t recognize it’s coming from me until Kojo wraps his arms around my shaking body.
With Jewel back in Louisiana for the summer, New York felt too small. My apartment still bears Preston’s scent. My favorite dumpling place became our spot. My mental health needed a change of scenery, so I packed a bag and joined Kojo here in Atlanta before he flies to Paris for his fashion show, a city with bad memories that stack higher than the Eiffel Tower. I’m on my way to Miami and wherever else work takes me.
