Page 87 of The Life Experiment
‘Maybe we should find somewhere private to talk,’ Angus suggested, but Layla’s eyes narrowed.
‘I don’t want to go somewhere private. I want to know the truth. So what, are you an investment banker? A crypto-genius? A trust-fund baby?’ When Angus couldn’t reply, Layla exhaled through her nose. ‘Come on, Angus. Tell me who you are.’
‘I… I’m Angus Fairview-Whitley.’
‘And?’ Layla demanded.
Gulping hard, Angus unravelled. ‘My family have money, Layla. Lots of it. We’re descended from nobility. I grew up on a country estate in Buckinghamshire.’
Stumbling as if she’d been shoved, Layla gripped her stomach. ‘Are you joking?’ she asked, but Angus’s sombre expression answered her question. ‘Why wouldn’t you tell me that, Angus?’ Angus’s silence onlyserved to infuriate Layla further. ‘Was I not good enough? Is it because my family isn’t wealthy? Are you embarrassed by me?’
‘It was nothing like that!’
‘Then why lie?’
Seeing the hurt in Layla’s eyes, something inside Angus shattered. ‘I never wanted to lie to you. It just… happened.’
‘Lies on this scale don’t just happen, Angus. Every moment we spent together, you were editing who you were. There’s nothing accidental about that.’
‘I didn’t lie about everything, I promise,’ Angus protested.
‘Just most things,’ Clarissa chipped in.
‘It’s not all lies, I swear!’ Angus argued. ‘Everything I told you is based on the truth. I’m still me. I’m still Angus who likes to cook, and who knows you enjoy having two chocolate digestives and a cup of tea when you read.’ Angus prayed the personal detail would make Layla soften, but her expression made it clear she didn’t believe him. ‘Layla, this had nothing to do with you and everything to do with me,’ he continued. ‘I wanted to be worthy of you. I wanted to be someone who did something with his life, who worked hard, who achieved things. I was lost before we met. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted, but I do now. I want you, Layla.I want you.’
Angus moved towards Layla, but she stepped away and wrapped her arms around herself. ‘You lied to me, Angus.’
‘I didn’t mean to!’ Angus cried, which only made Clarissa snort.
Angus thought he’d feel no greater shame than admitting to his lies, but watching Layla shrink back from Clarissa’s derision crucified him. The agony doubled when she looked at Angus through large, tear-filled eyes. Layla’s pain was there in plain sight, but beneath it was a firm resolve that terrified him.
‘I should be thanking you,’ Layla said, sniffing back her distress. ‘You’ve just saved me from wasting more of my time on a person who isn’t worth a second of it.’
‘I’m so,sosorry,’ Angus said, stepping closer. ‘What can I do? I’ll do whatever it takes. Please, Layla. You’re everything to me. I can’t lose you.’
Layla looked away, shaking her head. ‘I don’t think I can see you again.’
‘Layla,please. None of this was a reflection on you, it was about me! About how I saw myself, about how I hated—’
‘Do you hear yourself?’ Layla cried. ‘I, I, I… that’s all you can see, but I’ve just found out the last few weeks of my life were a lie! Do you have any idea how that feels?’ The look Layla fired at Angus sliced him in two. ‘You need to grow up, Angus, and I need to put myself first. That starts right here, right now.’
‘Layla—’ Angus didn’t know what he could say to keep her here, but it was too late. She was already striding away, back towards the park’s entrance.
Stumbling after her, Angus opened his mouth to call her name, but Clarissa clutched his arm.
‘I wouldn’t bother,’ she said. ‘She’s done. Can you blame her?’
Turning to Clarissa, Angus saw himself reflected in her eyes. A coward. He was everything he hated, personified, and there was no one to blame but himself.
41Layla
The Life Experiment: Daily Questionnaire
Property of OPM Discoveries
How would you rate your level of contentment today? (1 represents low contentment, 10 represents high)
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