Page 59 of Fear the Flames
No. If he was fine, then he would’ve been here. I tuck the loose strands of hair that frame my face behind my ears and take not one, but three steadying breaths. I’ve made jumps of this width before. I can do this.
Don’t think, just do.
Don’t think.
Don’t think.
“Cayden Veles, if you’re not bleeding, then I’ll make you bleed,” I vow to the stars.
I take off in a sprint without giving my muscles a chance to catch up with my mind. I pump my arms, gaining as much speed as I possibly can before my boot hits the chair, then hits the table with a loud clang, and I thrust myself into the air. Time slows while I bridge the gap. The wind whips at my face and through my cloak while my body propels through the air. I sail over Cayden’s railing, and my boots slap against solid stone. My face whips behind me, and I resist the urge to cheer while I face down my own balcony. Instead, a crazed laugh escapes my lips, and I raise my hand to flip off the gap I just jumped. Fuck you, gravity.
I pull two small knives from the holster on my calf and kneel in front of the double doors, making quick work at picking the lock. My palms tingle when the door swings open, but I’m only met with darkness and a perfectly made bed. His fireplace is cold, and none of the lanterns in his room have been lit recently; no traces of smoke linger in the air. I take extra care to keep my steps quiet while I inch toward the door. His door is around the corner from my room, so the guards won’t see me. I just have to listen for servants in the halls. My hand wraps around the knob, and I cringe at the sound of the bolt retracting. My face presses against the smooth wood while I strain my ears to listen for any approaching sounds.
When I know the coast is clear, I crack the door open and peer into the hallway. Only one side of the hall is visible, but it’s a risk I’m going to have to take. It’s either take a chance, sleep in here, or balcony-hop again. The door softly shuts behind me as I make my way into the hall, keeping my steps swift and light while keeping my head down. I’m used to missions like this; they’re all I did for most of my life. I would spy through floorboards and ceilings for any crumbs of information I could get. Darkness can’t scare you when you’re one of the monsters that lurk in it.
I make it to the archway that Cayden and I have used while traveling to and from headquarters, but there’s guards stationed on either side. Cutting a corner, I glide into the sitting room where Ailliard, Finnian, and I had breakfast. Moonlight streams through the windows, coating the room in a deep blue bath. I crack open the window farthest from the guards and slip out. The damp earth softens the sound of my landing. I squat down behind some bushes and keep as close to the castle as possible.
My hands pry some branches away from my face; the tree line isn’t far—only a few yards. I just need to get the guards’ attention away from there long enough for me to sprint. The branches bounce back in place after I release them. My hands brush against the ground around me until my fingers knock into something solid—perfect. I dig my nails into the dirt and pull a decent-sized rock free. Repeating the act, I pull another rock free. If I wasn’t here, I would’ve thrown it at the guards’ heads, but I don’t think killing or seriously injuring Vareveth soldiers is a symbol of good faith. I doubt Eagor and Valia would be eager to sign a treaty with someone that killed their soldiers.
I slowly rise to my feet, stepping slightly away from the castle. I toss the first rock in a long, high arc. It sails well above the guards’ heads and crushes several branches before smacking against the ground. The bushes are mirrored on the other side of the entrance.
“What was that?” the guard closest to me asks. They crane their necks toward the other side of the entrance, but I need them to turn their bodies as well. I glance down at the second rock. This better work. I toss it and hold my breath while it sails through the air in the same arc as the previous one. I ready myself in a sprinting position, keeping my eyes on the guards.
The rock hits the ground with the same crunch and thump. The guards unsheathe their swords and turn their bodies fully away from the tree line. I don’t wait to listen to what they’re saying. I take off in a sprint, pumping my arms and legs as I did while preparing to jump over the balcony. If I don’t make it to the tree line, then this was all for nothing. The night air burns my throat. I run as if a netherwraith is gaining on me, pushing myself to break through the tree line and continue sprinting until I’m sure that I’m far enough away from the castle. I run diagonally through the forest, in the direction of Ladislava, so that I won’t enter headquarters at the top of the hill. My eyes scan the woods while I run, making sure no beasts are lurking. Too many years in the Terrwyn have conditioned me to stay alert.
Candlelit windows rise in the distance, and I know I’ve made up for the time I lost while sneaking out of the castle. I slow my pace and break through the tree line, sticking to the shadows the buildings provide. Thankfully, hardly anyone is on the road, but I still don’t take my chances. Not only am I avoiding Vareveth soldiers, but I’m also avoiding any assassins that may be lurking. I’m not out for a fight; I’m out to find the idiot commander that never showed up in my room.
Sneaking and spying are second nature to me. I could never draw too much attention to myself whenever I left Aestilian, so I don’t have to think much about my movements. Morning hours are gaining on me, but it’s still dark enough that if I keep my head down, I’ll look like an average soldier. I’m traveling alone, so I shouldn’t draw too much attention to myself.
I exit the alleyway and round the corner to the horse pen that’s located by the path to the border. Dodging the main gate, I walk the perimeter until I find a loose part of the fence. I shift a log out of its holes and gently place it on the grass. Thankfully, all these horses are saddled and ready to be ridden at a moment’s notice. Saskia briefly told me that they change them out regularly. The horses don’t keep their saddles on for too long, and they’re always well rested and fed in case any soldier needs a horse in an emergency.
I grab the reins of the horse closest to me—a tall golden mare. She nuzzles my hand while I gently pat her nose and stroke her mane. I click my tongue and lead her out of the gap I made in the fence, briefly dropping her reins and placing the log back in its holes before swinging myself onto her. I lead her through the trees, once again not trusting the main road. We start off in a trot as we get further away from Ladislava. After a few minutes, I grip her reins in my sweaty palms. This is the last hurdle before I get to the border.To Cayden, my mind echoes. There’s no turning back now. Judging by the position of the moon, not much time has passed since I left the castle—maybe a half hour. I nudge my foot into the horse’s side, and she takes off in a sprint. The wind whips through my hair, and I cherish the feeling of being on a mission again.
Not in a castle where there’s guards waiting right outside of my room. But in a forest where there’s just me, the moon, the stars, and the trees.
I lose track of how long I’m riding for, too content to be alone and free, when a loud boom shakes the ground. My hands pull on the reins to slow the horse down, and my throat tightens while my heart hammers in my chest. I’m filled with a mixture of anticipation, curiosity, and trepidation. I’m at the border. Once the papers are signed, this is my future. Once I get my dragons, I’m going to be on that battlefield. It’s not something I want to see tonight. I just want to get to Cayden—to make sure he’s not dead or seriously maimed. If he’s okay, then I’ll kill him myself for making me worry like this. My horse made good time, not a single ray of light peeks through the trees. The ride technically wasn’t long, but anxiety stretches seconds into minutes and minutes into hours. I slide down and lean against a tree to survey the camp. I stayed fairly close to the main path, so Cayden’s tent can’t be far.
My eyes scan over the nearly identical tents but snag on one larger than the rest, with a sleek black horse tied in front of it. There’s no doubt in my mind that it’s Cayden’s tent. I lead my horse out of the tree line and walk her over to an unoccupied post with a water trough in front of it.
“I’ll come back for you later,” I whisper into her ear and give her nose another pat. I turn away from her and keep my head down while weaving between tents to get to Cayden’s. There are more people mingling here than at headquarters, but there still aren’t many. I don’t feel the exhaustion I should because my body is high on anticipation and adrenaline.
My clammy hands grasp the strap of my healing satchel when I reach the outside of his tent. The flaps flow with the breeze, and candlelight dances from the inside. He’s in there.
Please, be okay, so I can yell at you.
Don’t be hurt because…I’m scared of what I’ll feel when I look at you.
I reach out my hands to grasp the fabric of the entrance, and without announcing myself, I step inside.
ChapterTwenty-Eight
My breath hitches at the sight of him, and my feet stay rooted in place as the tent flaps fall shut behind me. He doesn’t look up from the desk he stands behind. The candlelight dances along his scarred cheek as he runs a hand through his wet hair. The black lace-up shirt he’s wearing blocks my assessment of his torso, but if he’s standing, then he must be okay.
The tightness in my chest eases—he’s okay.All the images of him bloodied on the battlefield float away into the abyss of worries that never came to pass. It shouldn’t be this relieving, but gods, it is. It feels like I can breathe again.
“Do you have the report?” he asks in a cold tone, still staring down at his desk. It’s just as messy, if not more so than his other two desks. His voice sends a shiver through me. “Well?” he inquires, finally looking up. The annoyed expression on his face instantly melts and is replaced by confusion. He pinches his eyes shut before snapping them open and blinking in my direction.
“Elowen?” His voice is light, almost a whisper. He glances between me and the glass of amber liquid before fumbling it and placing it on the desk. “Are you okay?” The haziness clears from his vision, and he rushes around the desk. “Why are you here?” I can hardly make out his features in the dark tent. His hands quickly stretch in my direction before he pulls them back, clasping them behind him.
