Page 109 of Fear the Flames
“Leave me if we can’t get back to each other.” My fists wrap around the leather straps that cross his chest. I want to shake him and scream at him to listen to me. Garrick will target both of us, but I’ll bear the brunt of it.
“I don’t take orders from you, angel. Don’t attempt to lock me in an empty promise,” the bitterness that infiltrated his chuckle stays laced through his tone. “I won’t lie to comfort you; I’ll never leave you behind. It’s you and me until the end—whatever end that may be. If you’re to die with a blade in your hand, then I’m to die by your side with a sword in mine.”
My teeth might crack from how hard I’m clenching them. It’s similar to what went through my mind when he implored me to leave him when we crossed the border. He wanted me to leave him, and I couldn’t fathom it. Honestly, even in the beginning, I would’ve stayed with him out of principle. But not anymore. I’m frustrated with myself because we promised each other no feelings would get involved, and I failed. I’m frustrated with him because…the realization rains over me like a hailstorm; each word is another ball of ice leaving a welt on my skin.
His safety means more to me than my own.
I lean forward and rest my head against his chest, not caring if it’s too forward; I just need this. His arms wrap around me instantly, and his chin rests on top of my head. My ear presses into his chest, listening to his heartbeat, it’s pounding, but it’s steady. We hold onto each other in silence for a few moments, where nothing other than the icy wind and the moon bear witness to two guarded people navigating their way throughvulnerability. It’s a treacherous, reckless path. Filled with beasts, thorns, and uncertainty. There are no maps, compasses, or stars to guide me. But despite all of that, I keep walking forward, blindly, into the darkness that smells so much like pine trees and cinnamon.
“Do you remember what I told you about when I make a promise to you?” His voice is calmer than before, and his heartbeat is slower. I begrudgingly lift my head from his chest. His arms loosen around me, but I’m still wrapped in them.
“That you always keep it,” I murmur. Moonlight trickles down from the sky and dances across his scarred cheek, hisbeautifulscarred cheek.
“My promises to you are vows branded in my soul. I will never make you a promise I can’t keep, and I swear to you I’m getting you out of that castle. You are not dying here.” He removes one of his hands from my waist to gently grasp my chin, “You do not relent. Do you understand me? Do not even entertain the possibility of fighting to your death tomorrow.” He rests his forehead against mine, and my eyes slip shut, shielding him from the emotion that’s flooded them.
“How can you be so sure?” I whisper.
“You’re too stubborn to die,” his soft chuckle fans against my lips, “and because I would find a way to defy death itself to keep you here.” My eyes flash open, and an unrestrained smile slides across my face. “Who else would challenge me and stuff me with pastries?”
“I found a new one for you to try!” I exclaim.
“Was it good enough that you would’ve written to me about it?”
“Mhmm,” I nod my head excitedly. “I added it to my Cayden pastry list.”
He softly chuckles, “You have a Cayden pastry list?”
“Yup. I keep it stored right up here,” I say while tapping my head.
“You ate while you were with Saskia? The whole pastry?”
“Not a crumb was left,” I confirm.
A broad smile coats his features, and he leans forward, pressing his lips into my forehead. I find myself wanting another as he slowly pulls away. I look into his eyes…and it terrifies me. The promise, the strength, the sheer magnitude of all the emotions he can force me to feel just through those two eyes. I step back, even though it feels like my body is going against the tide. Though, I feel that if I remain here, the current will overtake me. I’m already treading water as is. Chills wrack my body, and his eyes fill with concern. He doesn’t realize that I’m not shivering because of the cold.
He takes my hand in his before I can do something rash and walks us back to the inn. I force my legs to carry me forward and not stand rooted on the bridge all night. He guides me to walk in front of him before dropping my hand. We bound up the stairs silently, but I stop before opening the door to our room. I turn around to face him, having the height advantage on him for once.
“What color did you get for the ball?” I ask.
“I got a black suit and black mask because I wasn’t sure what you’d pick.” He scrunches his brows together in confusion. Probably wondering why I’m asking about this now.
“Do I have to worry about any gold embellishments being sewn onto my dress while I sleep?”
“Saskia,” he sighs, though he doesn’t look annoyed. A lazy smile spreads across his face. “I knew she’d stir up trouble once she got you alone.”
“Why did you do it?” I press.
His fingers brush down the top of my arms, “I do not believe your beauty needs any embellishment, nor do I believe anything can compare to it, but that dress would have paled in comparison to you.”
“The dress was beautiful before the embellishments,” I murmur, biting my lip to stop myself from smiling. The flush that creeps along my skin is illuminated by the sconces on the walls. His smile deepens as he takes in my disposition.
“I agree.” No matter how hard I bite my lip, I can’t fight the smile that now sits on my face in plain sight for him. His eyes dance along my features as they often do, taking in every detail. “But it never would have measured up to you.”
“You embellished your suit to match me,” my voice is as thin as a sheet of ice in direct sunlight.
“I’m a greedy man, Elowen. I make no apologies for wanting the entire ballroom to know that the most beautiful woman in the room was mine for the night.” He brings his face inches from mine to reach around me, twist the doorknob, and push it open. “Goodnight, angel,” he whispers, leaning in to kiss my cheek.
ChapterForty-Five
