Page 54 of Kept to Kill
‘Yet you seek to scare me anyway.’
He shrugged. ‘Take off your breeches.’
‘No!’
‘Do it or I’ll do it for you.’
She held his unwavering gaze for a moment and then let out a shaky sigh as she unbuttoned her breeches and eased them down her legs.
‘That should be enough,’ he said tightly, something strange entering his tone that she didn’t understand.
He sat on the ground, legs in front of him, and drew her front-ways over them. He pushed her down so she was lying across his thighs. Without preamble, he drew her tunic up, exposing her arse to him.
‘Fight me,’ he said softly, ‘and it’ll be all the worse for you, Fourth.’
With that, the leather of the belt came down hard on her backside and she cried out, biting her knuckles to contain the sound of her pain. His arm snaked across her back and held her tightly as it came down again, and she screamed into her fist, tears already blinding her.
Again the belt cracked on her flesh and, to her shame, she squirmed and writhed, trying to escape its sting, but he held her down, not letting her move as he swung his belt into her again.
She was openly crying now, not bothering to hide her tears, past caring if he or the others saw.
Lily was begging as well, she realized, little sobbing pleas coming out of her as her body, which she’d always thought was strong, betrayed her. She was weak and her power had been a crutch easily kicked out from under her. She saw that now. She shouldn’t be out here with these men. Someone like her belonged in a tower where she and everyone else was safe. Out here, she was going to die and none of them would care. She was as much a tool to them as she had been to Vineri.
Quin ceased his discipline.
She felt his hand on her arse cheeks, rubbing lightly in small circles.
Abruptly her tears dried and she wiped them from her face, sniffling, a hollowness enveloping her. These mercenaries didn’t care about her, a voice inside her reminded her cruelly. She was naught but what she could do for them. As she had been to everyone save the two boys she’d called family. But they were gone now and she had no one.
She could pretend in that tower, make believe that Vineri cared about her because he made sure she was clothed and fed and had a roof over her head. But there was no room for girlish fancies here. The truth was that she was worth nothing to them without her curse.
‘Is it done?’ she asked in a small voice, carefully keeping it emotionless, though she felt like her heart was going to leap out of her chest and throw itself into the fire simply for some respite from the bottomless sorrow in it. The sadness had been there a long time, but she’d pushed it down and forgotten it. Now, perhaps because of Quin or the others or her proximity to Kitore after so long, it was there again, in the open for anyone to see. Perhaps it was a good thing that no one cared enough to look.
‘Aye,’ he said gruffly, letting her go as she rose.
Refusing to look at him, she pulled up her breeches with a wince she couldn’t quite hide and averted her face, noticing the other two standing at the edge of the clearing and quickly turning away from them as well.
Had they seen? she wondered, feeling a dullness pervading her mind. Had they watched Quin take his belt to her, seen her tears, heard her pitiful entreaties for mercy? Did they see how pathetic she was now? Tears came to her eyes anew and she willed them away. Did she want them to have even less respect for her than they already did?
Unable to stomach their eyes on her, she made herself walk slowly to her bedroll and slip into it, closing her eyes and barely stopping herself from hiding her face under the cover like a frightened child. Her arse was on fire and she yearned to soothe it, but Quin hadn’t offered her their magick salve, so this must be part of it too, she reasoned. Not much of a punishment if she could take the pulsing soreness away as soon as it was done. She closed her eyes and, luckily, sleep came quickly.
* * *
Quin sat on the ground,his mind racing. He could hear his Brothers’ angry whispers. What had he done? He’d lost control of himself, that was what he had done. When had such a thing last happened? He’d been angry with her since he’d found them all together that morning, he realized. He’d thought it was because they’d all gone against his orders, but it wasn’t simply that. He was furious that she seemed to welcome their advances, even Mal’s. Gods, before they’d bound her into the unit, his Brother would have killed her as soon as look at her, but how quickly she’d welcomed him into her bed despite his predilections. Though after what he’d seen this morning, it might well be because of them.
He’d wanted to show her what real pain was, show her that Mal was merely playing games with her. For whatever reason, he didn’t seem to want to hurt their little Fourth, not really. Quin had needed her to see how weak she was without her power keeping them at bay. He’d wanted to prove how easily he could hold her down and cause her pain. Now that her body couldn’t hurt him, he’d wanted his to hurt her.
The look in her eyes when she’d struggled away from him, averting her face in shame from him and the others. They’d seen everything and he knew she realized that because he’d planned it that way as part of his discipline.
They had gone to get water, that much was true, but he had ordered them away. Although his Brothers had already been dealt with, he knew they’d hear Lily’s cries and return, yet be unable to do anything to prevent Lily’s punishment. More penance for them as well as her humilation in understanding that they’d seen her break.
He shook his head and got slowly to his feet, throwing the belt from him, the sight of it disgusting him. What had he done?
‘Fuck,’ he growled as he turned to find her huddled in her covers like a disgraced child.
His Brothers hadn’t approached. Both pairs of eyes swung from him to Lily and back again. They didn’t say anything to him, but he could sense their anger, their fury.
Quin turned and pushed his way through the undergrowth until he came to the stream. He fell to his knees on the gravelly bank and put a hand in the cold water. He drew it over his face. His Brothers were coming … for him. He didn’t bother to stand as they melted out of the trees close by, the two of them for once not at cross purposes.
