Page 52 of On My Side
“It’s not that I don’t want you…” I try to explain.
“It’s that you think you don’t deserve to be wanted the same way you want,” he finishes, and I’m taken aback by his words.
Is he right? Is that what I’m thinking?
He wants me, and I want him, and god, it’d be such a mess. I’ve done fine on my own and will continue to do fine.
But I think I want more than fine. I want something heart stopping and passionate and incredible, something that makes me more than happy.
I want him.
“Fuck it,” I hear myself say, taking the two steps it takes to get to him before wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling his mouth to mine.
Chapter 18
Ren
Playlist: Give Me Everything - Stripped | Archer Marsh
When I was twelve, I lost control of my bike while going downhill. I knew in the moment I should be afraid, because a crash was inevitable. But I felt invincible, like I was flying and it was going to last forever. And sure, I crashed into a parked car and broke my wrist, but before that? Pure bliss. I’ve never felt that pure rush of being alive since.
Until Audrey Hinton gave up her resolve and kissed me harder than I’ve ever been kissed. Hard enough for me to know she’s been fighting this as much as I have.
Her lips are soft, yet firm, as she kisses me like she’s searching for something specific, like she knows exactly what she wants and is going to find it. I hear a strangled groan, and it takes me a moment to realize that wasmystrangled groan. I place one hand on the back of her head, and the other on her hip, pulling her flush to me. God, she’s so soft and lush and her body against mine is exhilarating. Her hands are in my hair, running her fingers through them, and it feels too fucking good.
She pulls away and cups my face in her hands, eyes searching mine.
“Do you want to stop?” I ask in a voice I barely recognize.
“No,” she whispers, voice breathy. “No. Please… please don’t stop, Ren.”
I capture her lips with mine, and gently run my tongue along the seam. She opens her mouth with a soft whimper and her tongue meets mine, just as eager as I am.
My hands are everywhere: her face, her hair, the back of her neck, the small of her back, her hips… I want to touch every part of her. To memorize it and make a mental map so I know exactly where to go when I come back.
Audrey grinds her pelvis against me and I almost fall over. I’m aching for this woman.
We’re so desperate for each other, and I gently push her against the door. She surprises me by breaking our kiss and swiping her tongue along my jaw, hooking her leg around my thigh.
I press my forehead to hers, the metal of our glasses clinking, our chests heaving. “I want to see you come,” I gasp, trying to lower my voice. But doing my Sky voice when I can’t catch my breath is nearly impossible. “I want to be the one to make you come undone. Is that okay, sweetheart?”
“Ren, no,” she says, quietly. She reaches up, and at first I think it’s to push me away, but instead she lifts her hands to my face. She gently removes my glasses, folding them and slipping them into my sweats pocket. “I want you. Only you.”
It takes me a moment to understand what she’s saying. That she doesn’t want Sky, but me.
It’s soft and lovely of her, and I want to cry. Instead, I attempt to swallow the lump in my throat. I turn my face to press a kiss to the palm of her hand. “Ah, sweetheart. You have me.”
She gently urges me to look at her. “Sky’s made me come so, so many times, and it’s been good.” Her eyes are wide and earnest, shining like sea glass. “But I want Ren to make me come tonight. Is that okay?”
I grind my cock against her center and she gasps, leg tightening around me. “More than okay,” I groan. “A million times more than okay.”
I want to take my time with her, to savor her. But I can’t. Everything about this is fast and desperate and god, how could I expect different when I’ve spent a summer doing nothing but wanting her?
Her fingers dig into my shoulders as she clings to me, her hips grinding in a circular motion against me.
“You… you make the prettiest sounds,” I grit out against her mouth. “Don’t stop.”
She moans, her head falling back against the door. “You feel so good,” she whimpers as I kiss down her jaw, her neck. My hand brushes against hers and she intertwines her fingers with mine. I lift our hands, pinning them next to her head. Her free hand grabs my ass and god, I need her to consume me. To take so much of me that I only exist with her.
