Page 9 of My Silver Lining

Women are always a distraction.

Axel

He bailed on me too. Said he had a haircut, and he has senior photos next week, so he couldn’t miss it.

Bridger

Stop being pussies and shovel your own damn driveways.

Archer

Don’t have time to shovel. I have a child to take care of.

Axel

And this is why you need a nanny who isn’t a hundred and seven years old.

Clark

The kid doesn’t graduate for months. I highly doubt he’s getting senior pictures in the middle of a snowstorm. Trust me, he’s got a girlfriend, and he can’t see straight.

Bridger

Women are nothing but trouble.

Hey, I happen to love women. Well, aside from the heathen living across the yard from me.

Easton

Are we talking about Lulu Sonnet? Stay the fuck away from her. She’s Henley’s best friend, and she’s off-limits.

That should be easy enough since she beats the shit out of me every time I see her.

Bridger

Isn’t this the same woman who throat punched you a few days ago?

Clark

She sure did. He was being dramatic when I stopped by that day. He kept coughing and saying she damaged his trachea.

Dude. She karate-chopped the shit out of my throat. We’re talking “Karate Kid,” Mr. Miyagi type of shit.

Easton

I love that movie. But, how much damage could she do? She’s half your size, you dicksicle. Man up.

I’m going to throat punch you when you least expect it.

Easton

Will you be hitting me with your tampon or your lipstick?

Scratch that. I’m going to kick you in the dick.

Archer

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