Page 8 of No, For An Answer
Like their lives are much worse than other people. Most of the time all they need to worry about is what shade of lip gloss they’re going to wear. They all come from rich families and don’t know what it’s like to struggle. Fucking stupid. The only person I’ve really gelled with is Mia the past few days since I started here.
In school I was never the popular one. I was the one who was profusely teased about the way I looked all through kindergarten, until the day I met Maisy. We became best friends. Maisy was the complete opposite of me in every single way. She was brunette with honey-coloured eyes and had the most beautifully pale skin.
Her naturally pink lips, and heart shaped face were beautiful. She always looked like she was wearing makeup. A natural beauty everyone would say. Then there was me. Chubby Ashley. The one that no one looked twice at, the one who nobody paid attention to. She always had a way with the boys in our high school and always made sure everyone either hated her or wanted to be her.
Everyone except me. I loved her though, more than anything, but I didn’t want her life. I was happy being me. Boring old Ashley. Everything changed over the summer I turned seventeen. I came back from science camp a little slimmer, a little blonder and a lot more tanned.
My breasts grewan enormous amount and Maisy hardly recognised me. After that, I started to get noticed more. It was the final year of high school and soon enough I started to become a little more popular. Shortly after Maisy’s sophomore year, she changed. She became someone I didn’t recognise, and I tried desperately to get through to her and find out what was wrong. But she refused to tell me. Refused to even talk to me.
After a while I barely had any contact with Maisy at all. It’s like I didn’t exist anymore. Like our friendship meant nothing to her. I called numerous times a day and, in the end, our friendship died. Then, last year I learnt something that I’ll never forget until the day I leave this earth. It’s what brought me here.
Why I convinced my mother to uproot our life and come here for the man she loves and the new job she wanted. All that made it easier and considering he is a big donator to the science department; I got in nice and easy.
Because I needed to be here. Pushing the thoughts of Maisy and the incident from my mind I knock on the large wooden door in front of me and patiently wait for it to open. The door swings open and I’m greeted with the roundest man I think I’ve ever laid my eyes on.
Christ almighty.
Joseph Chambers stands in front of me in all of his rotund glory. I’ve seen pictures of the guy from twenty years ago and I’m being honest, he was a total fox. Think Biden in his teens.
Although the man that’s greeting me now is a shadow of his former self. He’s wearing a checkered suit with a fucking pocket watch hanging from the waistcoat that was far, far too small for him.
“Ashley Porter?” He questions, raking his eyes over my entire body and the shiver that runs up my spine makes me sick. He takes no shame in lingering on my breasts. Taking in a deepbreath as he focusses there for longer than is legally necessary. The guys like fifty.
Gross.
“That’s me,” I grin. Trying my best to give him the most convincing smile. When really all I want to do is stab him in the eye with the biro I have in my purse.
Sick fuck.
“Please,” He motions his arm to the side. “Come in and take a seat at my desk.” I walk in and I swear he breathes me in as I walk past.
Typical creep.
I drop my bag beside me and take a seat. It’s not like I’m wearing anything remotely slutty today either. The outfit I decided on today is a lot tamer than most girls around here wear. While I’m here I need to stand out but in a very subtle way. I’m wearing dark blue jeans and a black t-shirt. Paired with my favourite black and white Chuck Taylors. Nothing crazy. Nothing that would make a man desperately look over me like I was the first woman he’s seen in over a thousand years.
“So, tell me Ashley, how was the drive down here?” Walking round the table he squeezes his lardy ass into the swivel chair behind his desk and I do everything I can to suppress the grimace on my face. The way he’s looking at me too, is just the same as every other man who wishes they could have me but can’t.
“It was fine, thank you. My mother starts her new job next week so she’s just relaxing while I get myself ready. Thank you again for accepting me on such short notice. I know my step father really appreciates the kind gesture.” He waves his hand in front of me, rejecting the comment entirely.
“It was no problem at all. We had a vacancy last minute and what with your step father being a very good friend of mine, as well as a very big contributor to Brown, it would be rudeof me to turn him down.” Again, his eyes rake over my body, focussing on my swollen breasts that are propped up in my lace bra. His tongue darts out and wets his bottom lip. God men are sickening.
“Well, I appreciate it all the same,” I smile again. “I worked so hard during the summer. Enough to get my brain, mind, and body into shape for the coming year.”
“I hear you were a gymnast at your previous school.” It’s a rhetorical question, one I don’t need to sit there and answer, but the way his eyes continue to settle on every single part of my body, it makes me feel vile. Still, I work the hardest I can to try and make sure I give the most confident smile I can muster.
The muscles in my face are strained within an inch of their life as I continue to smile. Do people smile this much in general or am I trying too hard. I wouldn’t even know how to act fucking cheery if my life depended on it. I’ve masked my entire life, but no more than I am right now. Masking has always come easy to me.
Few people would understand what it’s like to have to hide who you really are on a regular basis, and how hard and time consuming it can be to act like someone you’re not. I’m happier than anyone would be in this moment. I’m right where I need to be, and nothing feels better.
“I can’t wait to start assisting the professor of the Criminal Psychology department.” I sit back in the seat a little more. And he follows me incredulously. This man really has no shame whatsoever. It’s like he doesn’t care at all if a young girl catches him staring. I feel uncomfortable and if I could, I’d end this conversation right here and right now. I can’t though, this man here is the sole reason I’ve even had a chance to become a TA.
I put in so much hard work for this spot, managing to push all other contenders away. He was very dubious at first, as most girls that apply are usually doing so to try and get into theprofessor’s slacks, I guess. Once I fed him the lie that I was already in a relationship back home, his dismissal of me during that interview became far lighter than I expected.
“I’ll tell you what sweetheart, how about I take you to meet Professor Danvers. You’ll be assisting him this year.”
“Sounds good.” I widen my smile and stand with him as we make our way out of the office and down the hall.
Nathan
