Page 38 of Mafia Pregnancy

Leo chooses that moment to barrel into the kitchen, already dressed for school but with his hair sticking up in seventeen different directions. “Carmen? Did you bring me a cookie?”

“Maybe next time, buddy.” She ruffles his already disheveled hair. “Go brush your teeth and fix this mess on your head.”

He grins and races back toward the bathroom, leaving us alone in the kitchen. She waits until she hears the water running before speaking again. “You slept with him again.”

It’s not a question, and I don’t bother denying it. “It was a mistake.”

“I’m not judging you. I’m just worried about the timing.” She leans forward, lowering her voice. “How much longer do you think you can hide the pregnancy? You’re almost twelve weeks now.”

“I know.” I sit across from her, holding the disposable coffee cup in a death grip. “I’ve been looking at job postings in other states. Nevada has a lot of opportunities, and the cost of living is lower.”

She frowns slightly but tries to hide it behind a sip of coffee. “You’re really going to run?”

“I’m going to protect my children.” The words come out sharper than I intended. “Both of them.”

Carmen studies my face with an intensity that makes me want to squirm. “What happened yesterday? You look...defeated.”

“When he kept pushing for a reason why we couldn’t indulge in an affair, I asked him to choose between whatever this is between us and his business.” The words come out flat. “When I told him I needed more than just a fling, he said he couldn’t walk away from his world.”

She sighs sympathetically. “So you walked away instead.”

“I had to.” I stand up and move to the window, watching the morning traffic build on the street below. “I’m afraid of what his world is like. That’s not a life I want for Leo or this baby. Or myself, if I’m honest.” It feels wrong to think about what I want under these circumstances though, when pursuing what I want has landed me in the same position twice now.

“Have you considered he might be willing to change if he knew about them?”

I instinctively shake my head. “He made it clear yesterday that his business comes first. Even if he knew about the children, that wouldn’t change who he is or what he does.”

Leo reappears in the kitchen, his hair now flat against his head and dripping with water. He sits down and inhales his cereal in mere minutes before announcing, “Ready for school.”

“Almost.” I grab a towel and gently dry his hair then clean milk from his face while he wiggles impatiently. “Remember, you’regoing to Aunt Molly’s after school today because Mommy has errands to run.”

“Cool.” He stands up and walks to his backpack. “Can we have pizza for dinner?”

“We’ll see.”

Carmen watches our morning routine with thoughtful silence, and I know she’s going to push back on my decision to leave as soon as we have a moment alone. I can see it in her expression.

She waits until after I’ve dropped Leo off at school and arrived at Radmir’s estate to start work for the day to voice her concerns.

“Are you sure about this?” she asks as we punch in at the clock in the staff room off the back entrance. It’s just the two of us, and she speaks quietly. “Running away feels like a pretty extreme reaction to one argument.”

“It wasn’t an argument. It was a reality check, and I was already planning to leave. You know that.” I slide my card into the clock, wait for the sound, and put it back in its slot. “I can’t trust him to prioritize his children if things get dangerous. If he’s involved in something even worse than I can speculate, how can I allow my kids to be exposed to that?”

Carmen nods slowly. “So you’re really going to take both his children and disappear without giving him a chance to prove you wrong?”

I turn to look at her directly as she punches in. “I’m protecting them from a world that could get them killed.”

She nods again but still looks troubled. “Does Radmir suspect anything about Leo?”

“I don’t think so. He’s never seen Leo, and I’ve been careful to keep my personal life separate from work.” I press my hand to my stomach, where the baby is growing. “That’s why I need to leave before this pregnancy becomes obvious.”

“Maybe he deserves to know about them?”

“Maybe he does.” I turn to look at her directly. “What he doesn’t deserve is to have his children used as targets by his enemies. What Leo doesn’t deserve is to grow up afraid, constantly looking over his shoulder, wondering if someone might hurt him to get to his father.”

Carmen sighs heavily. “I understand why you’re scared, but don’t you think Leo deserves to know his father? Don’t you think this baby deserves the same thing?”

I take a hard stance because I have to. “They deserve to be safe more than they deserve to know their father.”

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