Page 46 of Playoff
“Right there, baby,” he gritted out.
“Yes, yes, YES!” I did my best Meg Ryan impersonation.
A hand slid up my back and gripped the nape of my neck. He pulled me down, till we were face-to-face. I stopped moving and the condo was silent around us.
“Unless you want to do this for real, you might want to tone down your performance.”
His pupils were wide and his breathing had sped up. At this angle, I could feel that he was hard beneath me. I was panting too, and I could only blame so much on my bouncing. I wanted a repeat of that night. To forget my responsibilities and be selfish. But I couldn’t do that.
Not to my brother. Not after all he’d done for me, for our family.
I didn’t have to be a monk. I didn’t have to pass up a potential relationship. But not with this man.
So I apologized, and as his grip loosened I rolled off him. “How much longer is the skills competition on for?” I couldn’t get out of here fast enough.
Chapter 20
More won’t-power
Alek
* * *
Fitch didn’t stay up late. Jess was able to sneak out before midnight. I walked her to the door of our place, but she wouldn’t let me escort her to her own condo.
“It feels wrong to let you go on your own.” Which was stupid. I never escorted my hookups home.
She rolled her eyes. “It’s a secure building. And we don’t want anyone to know, remember?”
My brain immediately pictured the fun things we could be doing and need to keep secret. Not faking sex noises and talking about more people hurt by my family but repeating that first night we’d met.
Instead, she walked to the elevator and I watched till the doors slid closed behind her.
It took me a while to fall asleep after she left. I’d have liked to jerk off, after dealing with that simmering arousal, but it felt wrong to do it with her in my head, and I couldn’t push her out.
I knew my parents had upset people’s lives with what they’d done, stealing retirement savings, college funds, and investment accounts. Their victims had sent me messages detailing exactly how their lives had been upended by my parents’ greed. It was frustrating, and I’d wanted to help them, back when I was still reeling from what they’d done.
I’d lost my savings as well, and helping others hadn’t been possible, not till I’d been making better money on my second contract in the NHL. By then I was hardened. Some of the stories people had told me weren’t true, and even for the ones that were, I didn’t have the resources to make up for what my parents had done. There were too many victims, and I didn’t want to play god and decide who deserved to get their money back.
I’d lost money and had to find a way to handle my future without it. A lot of the people complaining might have a diminished lifestyle, but losses happened, even when you didn’t invest with criminals. Those were the arguments that let me sleep.
For self-preservation, I’d shut myself off from the problems my parents had caused others for a long time, and this was the first time in years I’d had to consider the fallout of what they’d done. More than just the money.
Fitch ribbed me about my hookup in the morning, but he had no idea who she was. His ankle was doing better, so we worked out together and I accepted his offer to go with him to Ducky’s to watch the All-Star Game tonight. A lot of my teammates would be there, and I didn’t have a secret meetup with my teammate’s sister to keep me otherwise occupied. Maybe this would be some kind of team bonding.
Ducky had a condo not too far away from Fitch’s place. Close to the waterfront, and not far from our practice and game arenas on the western edge of Toronto. Fitch and I Ubered so that we didn’t have to worry about having a few beers while we were there.
The driver was a hockey fan and excited to have us in his car, even though we were both fairly new to the team. It was an ego boost, having someone so pleased to see us. Those things didn’t happen often in LA where baseball and basketball got more attention.
Fitch led the way once we got to the building. “Until a little while ago, I was living here.”
Had he moved out to get some space to himself? Was I foisted on him? “You sure you don’t mind having another roommate?”
He shook his head. “I didn’t mind living with Ducky. He’s easy to get along with, and I didn’t want to live alone. After the divorce, it was too quiet. But he and his girlfriend needed some space, and I was ready to put down roots here.”
“Not sure this is going to be a roots place for me.” If there was any chance of Ducky returning to the team, there wouldn’t be room for me.
The elevator doors slid open.
