Page 78 of Trusting Tanner
“How much are you worth?”
“Uh-uh.” She shook her head adamantly. “I’m not doing this with you.”
“I gave you my number. It’s only fair you give me yours.”
“No!” She pointed at him. “I didn’t ask for your fucking number! I didn’t want to know. You’re the one who insisted I had to know. Don’t you stand there and tell me I owe you the same in return. I don’t owe you a damn thing.” She turned back to her bag, unzipped it, and shoved a few more things inside.
“Tell me.” For weeks he’d watched her, studied her, learned her moods and mannerisms, memorized everything he could about her, and he knew, without a doubt, there was something much bigger than a dollar amount running through her head right now.
“Fine. You want a number. I’ll give you numbers.” She spun around, her eyes blazing with an anger and hurt he’d never seen before. Stunned, he took a cautious step back. “Nine. That’s how old I was when both of my parents died in a car accident.” She took a step toward him. “Zero. The number of family members willing to take me in. Seven. The number of foster homes I had. Two. The number of group homes I lived in. Two hundred thousand. The amount of the check I got on my eighteenth birthday. Oh, and a pat on the back from my caseworker with a, ‘You’re free now. Go do great things with your life.’”
She stood in front of him now, her chest touching his. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and take her into his arms, to comfort her and tell her it would be okay, but he had a feeling that was the very last thing she wanted.
“So, to answer your question, Tanner. My number is nineteen point two million. That’s what a jury in the state of Kentucky valued my parents’ lives at. And the drunk asshole who hit them? He got five years in prison. So, yeah, I’m worth more than you. And all it cost me were my parents and my childhood. Happy now?”
She turned away and lifted her hands to her face. Tanner closed his eyes, knowing she was wiping away tears. No wonder she reacted the way she did when Xander and Ryder pushed the issue. And then, like a total ass, he’d pushed her even harder. Shit.
“I’d give every penny of it back to have them here with me again,” she whispered.
Tanner blinked in a pathetic attempt to stop the tears forming in his eyes. He stepped around her and grabbed her cell phone from the bed where it had been lying next to her bag. He held it out to her. “Call Devon and tell him you don’t need him to come get you.” He had no idea which shook worse: his hand or his voice.
Juliana stared at her phone and then up at him. Her eyes were red, her cheeks wet. Her lips trembled. He was trying to give her the space she needed right now, but the sight of her so hurt and broken…his heart seized, and his stomach dropped. How could he have done this to her? He should’ve dropped it like she’d asked. He shouldn’t have pushed her.
“Jules, please. Call him and tell him you’re staying.” His voice dipped, and a lump formed in his throat. If she didn’t agree, he had no idea what he’d do. But he couldn’t imagine being here without her.
“Why?”
“Because I don’t want you to leave,” he whispered. “I know if you walk out that door, we might never have another chance at this, and God, Juliana, I can’t handle that.” Tears pooled in his eyes, and he fought to keep them at bay. “So, please. I’m begging you. Call Devon and tell him not to come here.”
Slowly, she reached out and took the phone. Tanner held his breath. He stood right there as she made the call. “Hey, Dev. Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve changed my mind. I’m going to stay.” There was a brief pause. “No, he’s not forcing me to say this.” She met and held Tanner’s gaze. “I want to stay here with him. Please understand.” There was another pause. Juliana nodded. “Thank you.” She ended the call and tossed the phone back onto the bed. “There. It’s done. Now what?”
Now it was time for him to stop being a chickenshit and claim the woman he loved before it was too late. No more putting it off. By the time the night was over, she would know exactly how he felt about her. He took her face in his hands and brought his lips down over hers, tentative at first, unsure if she would push him away, but she parted her lips and welcomed him. He moved his hands, wrapped his arms around her lower back, and pulled her to him, sighing at the feel of their bodies pressed together so completely.
“I am so sorry. I had no idea.” He held her tight, refusing to ever let her go.
“You’re the only person I’ve ever told.”
He took a deep breath and opened his mouth to ask if she’d told Devon but thought better of it. Right now, it needed to be just the two of them. “I won’t tell anyone.”
“Will you do something for me?”
His heart hammered in his ears. “Anything.”
She stepped out of his arms. “This is probably going to sound stupid and girly and needy.”
“Juliana.” He cupped her cheek, hating how hard it was for her to ask him for a simple favor. “I would do absolutely anything for you, no matter how stupid or girly or needy you think it is.”
She wiped at a few stray tears. He’d never seen her look as beautiful as she did right then.
“Tell me what you want.” His voice was a hoarse whisper.
“I want you to lie in bed with me and…” She lowered her head. “Hold me.”
Christ, the emotion behind those two words knocked him on his ass. A myriad of thoughts and images bombarded him. Juliana had lost her parents. She didn’t have any close female friends he knew of, except maybe Mariah, and he wasn’t sure Juliana would classify that as a friendship. Sure, she had Devon, but she’d admitted they were just friends. Nothing more. She didn’t have anyone. And to make matters worse, the one guy she had been with was a serial cheater who verbally tore her down. He swallowed hard. He didn’t pity her. She didn’t need that emotion from him, and it was one he wouldn’t give her. She was much too strong for that. But he’d give her him. All of him. Without question.
“Told you it was stupid.” She gave a sharp, painful laugh. “I shouldn’t have asked. I’m sorry. You don’t have to.”
“No,” he said much louder than he’d intended. “I want to.” Taking her chin in his hand, he gave her lips a firm kiss. “Get changed into something more comfortable. I’m going to put theDO NOT DISTURBsign on the door.”
