Page 19 of Crusher

I shifted in my chair and looked at her. Shewas beautiful, and I didn’t give a shit, shewasmine. Hereyes were closed and her soft breaths that were coming out of hermouth were tempting and the little noises she made were cute.

Sometime in the middle of the night I had hadenough of the chair and moved to my current place of sharingCarly’s bed. I’d laid down on the side, slid my arm under her andshifted us to fit as comfortably as humanly possible in a bed madefor one. Add in avoiding the IV line and all was good. Thank fuckmy girl was out, ‘cause I had no doubt if she’d been woken up,there would have been an argument.

It wasn’t long after I joined her in the bedthat she curled into me and I had slept the longest I had in oneinterval for months, only waking when her body would twitch, whichI assumed was the pain making its presence known in her slumber. IfI could take it all away for her I would.

My only problem with the current situation,was between her warm breath hitting my chest through my t-shirt andthe small hand that started at my chest and rubbed back and forthand up and down, moving lower with each pass. My brain understoodthe woman beside me was injured and needed care, not mauled, but mydick evidently missed that message or ignored it because its stateof being trapped behind my zipper, jumping every damn time the handmoved closer, reminded me that I was the one who put us both inthis situation, which only pissed me off.

The nurse came in and I turned more towardCarly to hide the evidence of my arousal, her frown gave away herknowledge of my predicament, her whispered words verified it.

“Remember, she needs to curb her activitywhile she heals. She can’t get to worked up,” the nurse said, thenwalked out the room and pulled the door closed behind her.

The body beside me shook and the face pressedharder into my chest so the laughter couldn’t be heard.

“How long you been awake?” I tightened my armaround her.

“How long you been in my bed?” The woman I’veknown these months was back. I’d often wondered if she saw her ownstrength, her ability to see the light at the end no matter if thebeginning was dark. She found the positive in a situation, andaccepted the good and didn’t let the bad drag her down. She wasmouthy, independent, hardheaded, and I wanted her to be mine inbody and soul. I was patient, steadfast, and determined, she didn’thave a chance. I just needed her to accept it.

“Not long enough, baby.” She pinched myside.

“I meant now. I don’t understand why you keepthis up. We had sex, I walked out when I found out you were clubbecause I’m not Sami, I don’t want club life, Crusher. I’ve spent alot of time untangling myself from it.” She tried to untwineherself from me and I wouldn’t allow it. Her huffed breath showedher agitation.

“You’re wrong, Carly. You may not want clublife, but the club is embedded in you. Why do you think you ran toHaven? And finding out about Speed, accepting it so easily,everything you’ve done to this point shows different.

“You distanced yourself from Stone, even yourmother, it wasn’t because they were club or you never would havegone to Sami’s house. You were young and the shit that went onaround you was wrong, but it had nothing to do with club, only thepeople. Fight it all you want, but the life will always be a partof you, that you can’t get rid of.

“Are you going to give up Sami and Ally?Going to distance yourself from Speed because of his affiliationwith Black Hawk? You can’t have it both ways. You know it, and Iknow it, the difference—I’ve accepted club life and the part I willplay in it—you haven’t.” I released her and got out of her bed.

“I’m not going to ignore Speed, but he is inthe club, I’m not. It is the same with Sami and Ally, even the menat Haven. I went to Haven to find answers. I’ve built a lifeoutside the club, Crusher, and you and no one else can make me comeback to it.” She raised the bed putting herself into a sitting upposition.

“Good to know about Speed, Sami, and Ally.And you didn’t run to Haven for answers, Carly, it was because themen have been and are your family. As far as making you come intoclub life, you’re right no one can, but no one will have to eitherbecause you will do it on your own, just like I’m not going topressure you to be with me, that too will be because you want thereto be an us.”

“You are going to be waiting a long time ifyou think I am going to come to you.”

“I’m patient, Carly. And while I wait for youto catch up with me, I will be there, waiting.”

“Why, Crusher, why are you doing all this? Itwas only one time, no one pushes so hard after one time withsomeone so why?” Her frown told me, she had no clue, she wouldthough.

“The first time was your body but, baby, yourstrength is what keeps me coming back.” I grabbed my bag and headedtoward the bathroom in the room. Christ, I hoped it didn’t take herlong to catch up with me.

Carly

When the bathroom door closed behind him, thetears came. I didn’t cry. I never cried. But what he said, OMG, whowouldn’t cry. The door pushed opened and the nurse came in with mytray and meds, until I saw her my leg pain hadn’t even registered.I wiped my eyes as she moved to the side of my bed, sat the traydown and handed me the cup that held the pills. I swallowed themdown and then she did her thing: blood pressure, temperature,looking at the bandage and checking to see if the wrap wasn’t tootight. She gathered her things and then looked at me.

“Sweetie, my Elliot, he pursued merelentlessly and it took a good year before I would even go outwith him. If he had said something like your young man just did atany time during his pursuit, I would have been the one to drag himto the altar because I would have been afraid that he would wake upon day and think me not worthy. Men like yours, don’t come aroundevery day, those are the ones you just hold onto and let them takeyou on the ride of your life.”

“But why put up with a bossy, bullhead manwho plows over you?” She smiled, then bent closer.

“Because when they focus it all on you, it’sa powerful feeling. Nothing better than young love, hon, well,maybe older lovin’.”

“Oh, we aren’t in love,” I said and shewinked and walked toward the door.

“Denial is a wonderful thing.” She chuckledand pulled the door closed.

When Crusher came out of the bathroom I waseating my breakfast. He placed his bag back in the corner, theninformed me he was going down to the cafeteria to grab coffee andsome breakfast for himself and that he would be back in a bit. Thedoor closed and he was gone and I suddenly felt alone.

After I finished eating, they’d returned tohelp me clean up and put on a new gown, then they took the trayaway. What I would give for my t-shirt and shorts I usually sleptin. The doctor came in no soon than I was back in bed. He askedquestions on my pain level, un-bandaged my thigh and checked outhis work, when it came time to tell me how long I would have tostay at the hospital, Crusher walked in.

“Doc, how is she?” Crusher said and walked tothe opposite side of the bed the doctor was on.

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