Page 107 of Follow Your Instincts

“I hope you figure out how to stop being such a miserable asshole all the time,” I said and left. If I ever had to see Jess again, it would be too soon.

Our next stop was my old apartment where Kira was already waiting to help us box everything up.

“Please, just don’t make fun of how poor I am,” I said as Lucas drove us back into the city from Brookwood.

“Not your fault they pay officers like shit,” Soren said from the backseat.

“And you’re not poor now, sugar,” Lucas said, squeezing my hand. “What’s ours is yours.”

I huffed a laugh. “Pack life is so weird,” I said, looking out the window. We were passing over the bridge back into the city, and the skyline looked beautiful against a clear, late autumn sky. Soon it would be gray and cold, but the sun was shining. It felt like the perfect day for a new beginning.

I begged to stop for coffee on our way, so Kira would be a little bit nicer while being forced to do manual labor.

“It’s your turn to go in,” Lucas said to Soren, meeting his grumpy gaze in the rearview mirror. He was not happy at all about being stuck in the backseat.

Soren sighed and muttered under his breath, but he did get out of the car to go grab the coffee order, glowering.

I laughed at his expression and Soren’s face clearedimmediately. Contentment flowed down our bond.

“Be right back,” he said.

I squeezed Lucas’s hand where it rested on my thigh, our fingers intertwined. I hadn’t planned on having this conversation with Lucas yet, but one-on-one time was proving to be a little hard to come by with Pack Murray.

“So… can we talk about what happened?” I asked and peeked at him.

Lucas paused. “Yeah, we probably should.”

Neither of us said anything for a moment.

“This shouldn’t be this awkward,” I mumbled. “I had your dick in my mouth like 24 hours ago.”

“It’s not awkward, sugar,” Lucas protested, then paused. “Okay, maybe a little awkward.”

“I just want to make sure you aren’t uncomfortable about anything that happened,” I said, turning in my seat to face him fully.

Lucas laughed, startled. “You’re asking ifIwas uncomfortable?”

“Well, yeah, that whole situation was probably as opposite to asexual as humanly possible,” I said and felt a blush creeping up my cheeks.

Lucas released my hand and gently stroked my flushed skin. “I did not have a good handle on my instincts during your heat,” he said sadly. “I think it’s because I’ve never really felt them like I feel them with you. I was barely in control. I thought I’d scared you.”

My mind flashed back to Lucas during my heat, his pupils blown wide, a predator. My perfume started, and I mentally clamped down on my inner Omega. Now wasnotthe time. “You definitely did not scare me. I like out-of-control Lucas just as much as this more rational version. And I’m not like… expecting anything different now. I like this, too,” I said, leaning my face into his hand.

Lucas looked deeply into my eyes, flicking between them as if to catch a lie somewhere. Then he leaned down and pressedone of his sweet kisses to my lips. I wished more than anything in that moment that we had bonded already so I could feel what he was feeling. Because I was fully head-over-heels for him.

“Sugar, whatever you want or need, I am here for you,” Lucas said when he broke the kiss. “We've got all the time in the world to figure things out. Just… know that I have you. Always.”

I smiled up at me, then felt a slight tug on the bond as Soren made his way out of the coffee shop with a drink carrier and a bulging paper bag.

“What the hell did you order?” he said when he got back to the car.

“You’ve clearly never dealt with Kira when she’s doing something she doesn’t want to do,” I said. “These are bribery muffins.”

Of course, we couldn’t find parking outside my building, so I told the guys I’d head up first while they circled the block. Lucas wanted to come with me, but I convinced him not to. I didn’t remember leaving my apartment very clean, and the last thing I wanted them to see was a pile of moldy dishes or something else disgusting.

My building looked so dingy now in comparison to the pack house, but I refused to be ashamed. I was proud of being independent before I’d met the pack, and I was going to remember that even while being confronted with my sad little studio apartment.

I made my way up the stairs, balancing the drink carrier in one hand to fish out my keys. I wrinkled my nose. The staircase smelled worse than usual. Independent or no, it would be very nice to not have to haul my ass up these stairs ever again.

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