Page 15 of Mic Drop

Tears well. I can’t lose her too. I’ve had too much loss. First my grandmother, then Darren. Ma can’t be next. Shaking my head, I race out of the office and find Ma waiting for me by the external door. She places her hand on the doorknob. “Take me home, Jenna. We’ll talk there.”

Because I can’t force a word out of my mouth, I do as I’m told. Once we’re settled in her house again, she begins. “Sweet Pea, none of this is new to me. In my book, quality over quantity rules. Let’s make this time special.”

“Ma, I don’t want you to give up.”

“Don’t you see? I’m not giving up anything. I have you and Kara, plus her husband and kids. I’m alert and alive and able to still laugh at your antics. We can enjoy whatever time I have left as normal as possible. Sound good?”

“How does Kara feel?”

“She’s on board now. She was taking me all over for this and that opinion, and everyone came back with the same diagnosis. Doctors aren’t gods.”

“But I want you with me.” A tear streaks down my cheek. Forsomeone who hasn’t cried in decades, I seem to be making up for it now.

“I always will be. Right here.” She pats her heart, which I mimic.

My sniffling turns into full-blown sobbing as she wraps me in her embrace. How will I ever survive without her love and support?

“I’ve been blessed. I have two wonderful girls and have lived a fantastic life. You both are well on your way to making your own marks in this world. What more could I ask for?”

“Kara’s making her mark. So’s her husband.”

“As are you, in case you’ve forgotten about the two physical therapy clinics you’ve opened.”

Into her shoulder, I mumble, “Working on three.”

She chuckles. “I stand corrected.”

We remain in an embrace until my crying slows and finally stops. I lean back. “We’re going to have the best time ever.”

She smiles, and it reaches her gray eyes this time. “There’s my girl.” She yawns. “I’m going to take a nap. Will you be all right?”

“I will.” She kisses my cheek and makes her way into the bedroom.

Opening my messenger app, I text Kara and fill her in on today’s adventure with Ma. No need to bother her about Michelle. The gnat can do whatever it is she wants, Ma’s more important.

I sit in the living room, unable to concentrate on anything despite trying to go through my emails. Deciding a hit of social media is all I can tolerate, I open an app and flip through stupid videos.

Until one from “The Biggest UC Fan Ever” catches my attention. I don’t mean to watch the clip from the concert. How Bennett seems larger than life onstage, in his black leather pants singing his heart out with his brothers, all the while denying their friend status. I refuse to be drawn into his green eyes, which somehow appear more expressive than ever—radiating cocky lead singer, sexy man, and pain. I bet no one else sees the pain simmering below the surface. I do.

I guess that makes us even. I’m dealing with more than my own pain.

Closing out of social media, I open my text app once again and click on my nickname for Bennett, Rock Star. The name makes me smile a bit, remembering happier times. Were we going through Graceland only a week ago?

I still love him. Guilt over how I left things between us bubbles to the surface, and the need to tell him what’s going on overwhelms. I pull up his contact, Rock Star, and start typing:

I’m so sorry I ran out on you. I had just gotten the news from Kara that Ma’s sick. Really sick. As in the doctors don’t have any treatment plan available for her.

Tears stream down my cheeks again. As I swipe them away, I reconsider contacting Bennett. What can he do? He can’t fix Ma. What else matters?

On an inhaled sob, I delete the text. Bennett can’t help this situation. No one can.

Chapter 5

Bennett

Somehow, I manage to get through tonight’s performance. I’m not sure how, but Coop picked up on how I was faking it. Luke was well aware, given my session with the roadies’ punching bag.

Coop didn’t know anything about that, though. All he and the rest of the guys knew was Luke and I skipped dinner. At least he didn’t press me for more than I was willing to give, which wasn’t much.

---