Page 58 of Take Hold of Me

Wills

We’re backin first class, Emilie busy at work on her Instagram fashion site. I close my eyes and replay our weekend. She’s so damn beautiful. But, her smiles are closed off when she’s working. Not the smile of someone who loves her job. Of course, as a model, she has to maintain a certain degree of separation so that the photographer will get the proper shot, but it’s more than that. Her heart really isn’t in it anymore. The starfish proved that to me.

I turn my head and sneak a peek at her. She’s practically radiating happiness as she assesses photos submitted by her followers. One-hundred thousand people have found her not because she put “Emilie Dubois” on the account, but because she’s damn good at showing her heart and giving advice. Her demeanor now versus when she’s at a shoot is night and day. I want to help her find a new outlet for her creativity. But what do I know about creativity? No, it’s really that I want to helpher.

Itching to touch her, I flex my fingers instead. She needs someone who can give her more than I ever could. My heart constricts at the thought of never kissing her again, never hearing her soft moans as she comes undone for me. But, I can’t be a selfish asshole, for once. I was selfish to choose personal training over the Marines, and Three is dead. I was selfish to let Roberto and Jared take the lead when we were watching over Cole and Rose in that house, and now they’re dead too. I have to put someone else’s needs in front of my own, even if that means cutting her loose.

“Wills, could I practice driving today in your Jeep? I have to go to the Agency and meet withMonsieurPrice.”

Say no. Don’t give in.

“I have my drivers’ testing coming up and I have missed so many days of practice.”

She turns her eyes—more khaki today—to mine. I could get lost in them for years. I can’t give her up. I’m going to be a selfish asshole after all. “Sure.”

“Afterwards, I will drive us to your favorite restaurant and you can introduce me to Zak, like you promised.” She bats her eyelashes at me.

I know I should, but I can’t refuse her. “I’ll check if he’s available while you’re in the meeting.”

She leans over and kisses my cheek. “Did he help you during rehab after you were shot?”

Her change in topic steals my breath. “He stopped by and helped me out with some of the exercises the doctors gave me.”

“That is good. I wanted to be there for you more often, but I visited as much as I could. It must have been really tough on your parents when you were shot. So soon after your sister….”

I suck in my breath. “Yeah, it was a bad time for all of us.” Not that they visited me all that often. If Three were still with us, they still would not have visited. But she would have fussed over me. That thought brings a smile to my face. Recalling the few visits by Emilie reinforces my smile. She fluttered around me, trying to make me more comfortable. Her floor show did everything but. It’s probably for the best that her work schedule took her away.

“I would like to help you heal your relationship with your parents. Family is important.”

And we’re back to this. I shake my head. “Not every family is like yours, Ems.” Her chin kicks up a notch. She’s not going to let this go, though. I can tell. Maybe she needs to see it in living color. Yup, selfish asshole. I sigh. “If you’re dead set on meeting them, why don’t you come with me to their anniversary party? It’s this Saturday.”

Her whole face lights up as if I told her the starfish family were going to be there. “I would love to!”

“Don’t get your hopes up, Ems. We’re not warm and fuzzy. I wouldn’t bother going, but for you.”

“I want to meet them. If for no other reason than to thank them for raising such a wonderful son.”

Maybe FPU will put her off, where I can’t. She’s so pure and innocent, she really believes she can fix my relationship with my parents. I hate to disappoint her, but somethings cannot be fixed. Maybe seeing the reality will make her run. Right back to Rinaldo.

While my head battles with my heart, a yawn stretches across her face. “I think you need a nap. After all, you’re going to be driving when we land.” I grab a packet that holds a blanket and open it.

As she takes the blanket from me, she says, “I cannot wait.”

While she sleeps, I mull over where we are. She means so much more to me now because I’ve seen her. And felt her. I want her to be happy, but how could that include me? The monster inside me pinned her down on the bed this morning, and I can’t hurt her.

Maybe FPU will do me a favor.

LAX is better equippedto handle celebrities and the paparazzi that follows them. Before we landed, I pulled the flight attendant aside and demanded a personal rep meet us at the gate to assist us through customs. The plan worked like a charm. Despite her fears, the name “Emilie Dubois” commands attention.

The limo waited for us at the curb and we made a quick getaway before the paparazzi spotted us. Only having carry-on luggage has its perks. Once, I was assigned to guard the reality star, Mimi Barker. She traveled with more luggage than some department stores sell. My Ems isn’t like that.

My Ems. Damn. I’m not going to give her up, no matter what bullshit I was feeding myself back on the plane. I didn’t even let her ask me to join her in the back of the limo—I just slid in right behind her.

“Are you happy to be back in LA?”

“I am excited to see my house again. It is still so new for me to own it. I loved decorating it.” She wiggles her eyebrows. “Maybe after my meeting and drinks with Zak, we can christen it.” She leans over and whispers in my ear. “I have never had a boy in my bedroom.”

“Have anyone in mind?”

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