Page 99 of From West, With Regret

“I love you,” I say, my voice hoarse. I’m no longer sobbing, but my tears are still fresh, welling in my eyes. I can’t stopcrying. It’s an overwhelming mix of emotions. Ones I haven’t yet taken control of.

I unbutton his shirt, then slip it down his arms. I press my hand to his hardened muscle, just over his heart, and look in his eyes. “I love you,” I repeat, this time a little stronger than the last.

Shifting to our knees, we kneel in front of each other. I run my hands over West’s face. My fingers trace his eyes, then the stubble lining his jaw. My chest sparks, recognizing the curve of that jaw. It’s more prominent than it was at fifteen, the last time I’d seen him. I’ve looked at it many times over the past few months, but I’m seeing it differently now.

“Our past is ugly.” I tremble, admiring his face. My nail grates against his stubble, then I flick my gaze to his. “But looking at you now, with my memories of you then and what we had…” I swallow. “It’s something I didn’t have before, and it’s beautiful.”

A tear slips from his eye, and he inhales a sharp breath before claiming my mouth with his. He slips the rest of my dress over my hips. We both move to a stand, still locked in a kiss, and I kick off my heels. I’m standing in front of him in nothing but my thong. He’s already working to remove it when I start unbuckling his belt. When we’re both free of our remaining clothes, he wraps his hands around the back of my thighs and lifts me.

I curl my arms and legs around him. I think he’s going to carry us to the bathroom, but he surprises me when he walks over to the plush, leather chair set in the middle of his living room. I fall against it, with my back against one arm, my legs over the other.

The chair smells exactly like West, and I’m overcome with love for him.

The apartment is dark. Apparently, it’s still nighttime. Theroom is covered in shadows, and when West looks down at me, all I see is the hint of light in his blue eyes.

Wrapping both hands around my ankles, he pulls me until my ass lifts onto the arm. The warm air of his place breezes across my nipples. I hold my breath.

West is healing me, doing exactly as I asked him to.

He’s loving me.

Holding onto the back of my knee, he drives himself inside me. I tilt my head back, overwhelmed with the feeling of being wrapped around him.

When he pulls back, I look up at the ceiling.

“Look at me, Dimples.”

He wraps a hand around my face, pulling my gaze to his beautiful face above me.

A tear streams from the corner of my eye, and my chest expands before it finally explodes with love for West and all he’s given me. I think about the years he spent searching for me, and the two times when he did, I’d treated him like a stranger. Like a ghost.

Clasping my legs around West tighter, I hold him against me as he drives himself in deeper. We move in sync effortlessly. His hand falls to my hip, and as I stare into his eyes, I come undone, gasping for air. Then he’s bending, stealing my mouth, breathing air back into me.

He’s bringing me back to life one breath at a time, and when he stills, with his cum spilling into me, he falls forward and rests his head on my chest.

He lifts his shaky hand and traces an invisible heart over the swell of my breast, complete with a large ‘W’. “I’ve always been in here, Dimples. I’ve always been yours.”

I holdme knees close to my chest, staring at the opaque water in West’s bathtub.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” West says, running his fingers through my hair. He’s rinsing the rest of the shampoo out, taking his time, and I let him. I think at this point, we’re both caught in a daze.

I lift my hands out of the water and turn them over. The dirt that accumulated under them has dissolved, so I dip them back under.

“A lot of things.” I frown, biting the inside of my cheek to keep me from falling apart again. I don’t want to cry anymore. I’m so tired of crying.

West smirks behind me in the reflection of the floor-length mirror in front of the tub. “I figured.”

“For years, I thought if I was able to put all the puzzle pieces together, I’d get a good idea of the entire picture of my life, but it’s massive and messy. Somehow, the puzzle is even more confusing now that it’s pieced together.”

“It’ll take time, Dimples.”

I sniff and nod before looking down at the water again. I run my hands over my knees. “I only want to ask you this one time, and once I have my answer, I never want to talk about it again.”

West shifts behind me, straightening his back against the tub. I lift my eyes and find his in the mirror.

“What happened to him?” I whisper. “After I left…”

Pressing his lips together, he averts his gaze to the side, then he’s back to me. “You remember what we said that night, when he was still lying there?”

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