Page 7 of The Tape Job
“Fuck!” I let out a breath, trying to clear my thoughts. I’m feeling fidgety and anxious because all I want to do is talk to Vicky and figure out how we can fix things. My mind is working overdrive, set on considering what I can do next. Then a whole wave of fresh anger courses through me. “This is all your fault.”
I round on him, but he puts his hand out, which I grab, but he spins around and grapples me. We’re standing in the tunnels fighting like kids, but I don’t care how childish it looks. I’m pissed.
More footsteps sound, but I don’t recognise them. It’s only when Jen’s voice floats through the air that we stop dead.
“Oh my god, what are you doing? Where’s Vicky?” She says, coming to a stop next to us.
Ryan steps back and fixes his eyes on mine.
“She ran off,” we say together.
“Give us a moment please, babe,” he says, his tone as soft as shit. “Could you try to find Vicky?”
She hesitates for a moment before nodding and walking away.
Ryan moves in close. “Don’t you dare put this on me. You fucked up. You promised Johnny. I did you a fucking favour.”
“What about that favour I did you, huh?” I say. Our faces are inches apart now, and if he wasn’t that little bit stronger than me, I’d take him out.
My words hit though because his shoulders sink, and he steps back just a small amount. It’s something that hasn’t been brought up for a long ass time but now twice in two days.
“Figure out what you’re going to do, but you have to tell Vicky if you decide you’re coming here next season.”
“I’ll be here,” I shrug, but as soon as I’ve said it, I know it’s going to be a terrible decision.
His face relaxes, and I figure now’s as good a time as any to break the news.
“It’ll be my last season, bro. With you and Johnny—for old times’ sake—then I’m done.”
“You’re kidding?” he scoffs, half-grinning.
“Nope.”
Ryan’s face drops into a frown. “You’re retiring? Why?”
“I’m just exhausted with it all.” I look down at my runners.
“Because of Vicky?” he asks.
I nod. He knows. Everything in the goddamn eco-system of hockey is just a reminder of Vicky. Everything. The smell,the noise, the feel of my hands on my stick, the stick she would have taped before.
Every time my skates hit the ice—Vicky. Every time I pull my sweater on—Vicky. Every time I look up at the jumbotron—Vicky. God only knows why, but she’s there. I can’t even look at Johnny sometimes, if I’m honest.
But I’ll play out my last season here. Mainly because of Johnny, but I know Vicky needs a friend. She doesn’t know it yet, but she does.
“Fuck. This isn’t what I was expecting. Have you told Dad?”
“I haven’t told anyone, except you. Yeah, this season with the Marlies’ has been fine, and I got the call-up, you know, but I think I need to set myself free. We always said we’d play a season together if we could and this is our chance. Besides, something tells me you’re not going back.”
Ryan raises his eyebrows and opens his mouth to reply, but Jen comes into view again and stops next to him. “Did you see which way she went, Liam?”
I shake my head.
“Should I call Johnny?” she asks, looking between us.
“I’ll call Johnny,” I say, pulling my phone out, but he’s already beat me to it; there’s a text waiting for me.
Johnny
