Page 21 of Nerd Jock Hockey
I crank a brow for his benefit. Because adventure? Him?
“I could. Iwould,” he insists. “I want to go places. Someday.”
“Alright, I guess that kind of list is fine.”
“Deciding my next hobby?”
He almost gets a smile from me. “Is that something you do?”
“I like lists, Ari. I make a lot of lists.”
That heavy sensation sinks into my gut, stirring up the bile. Cody likes lists. He squeezes my hand.
“I’ll never make a list about you again,” he promises. “Never.”
We slip into the silence for a bit, nothing but the truck engine knocking and clunking. Might need a new fan belt by the sounds of it.
“Do you want to know what was on the list?”
So, so much. And. Not at all. “Okay.”
“I think you’re handsome, and before you tell me that’s superficial, I don’t find many people handsome, so that kind of stuff stands out for me.”
Keeping my eyes on the road, I bring his knuckles to my lips and press a kiss to them.
“And just who else are you calling handsome but me?” I tease.
“No one,” he lies. “Okay, fine. Kevin Bieksa.”
“Kevin Bieksa’s hot as sin. Guess I can let that one go.” Kevin Bieksa’s one of the finest professional hockey players ever to grace the ice. “Is he handsomer than me?”
“Never.” Cody smiles. “But wait, there’s more than just handsome.”
He goes on to tell me things, like, how warm and safe he feels with me. The way I make his heart speed up and slow down. How his body tingles like fizz when I touch him.
“And I suppose I can’t say that I know a lot about you, yet, but I know you’re a good man, one I’d like to get to know. I know that you …” His voice falters. “Doug.”
“Doug,” I repeat.
“You stuck up for me. I liked you before that, but then you stuck up for me. Nobody’s ever done that for me before, well, except my parents, but they don’t count.”
I pull into the driveway of his parents’ house and kill the engine. I turn to face him, trying to read the rainbow flash of expressions coloring his eyes.
“What’s your con?” I don’t say cons. There only needs to be one.
“Mostly your friends. They’re assholes, Ari. Or, well, Doug is. I can’t say I know the rest of them, but they let Doug be an asshole. I didn’t know if I’d be able to handle that in the long run.”
“I quit the team. Tonight. Because of Doug.”
“What? Ari, you shouldn’t have done that for?—”
“I did it because it was the right thing to do.” And because, one of these days, I wasn’t going to stop at a couple of punches. It was better that I remove myself.
“Then there is no con. Not about you.”
Maybe that con has been removed, but a new one could show up. He could decide that I’m not enough to handle in the long run.
Fuck, why did I start this thing with Cody? I might not be a relationship expert, but I know that’s how relationships work. You can only try. Things might not work. Hence why I’ve avoided a real relationship like the plague.
