Page 172 of Scoring the Player
“Listen to what you just admitted. You needed a coach and an advocate more than you needed a boyfriend.”
“You could have been all that.”
“There was also the power dynamic between us. What if I crossed the line, and we got into a fight after? How would that affect your game? It was too risky. I didn’t want anything to risk your chances of making it. Not even me and my feelings for you.”
“We should have talked about it. You ghosted me. Fuck. For years, that shit twisted me up. You could have been honest instead of cutting me off.”
Maybe then I would have been able to fully commit to the man I’m in love with without being scared shitless that he’ll wake up one day and reject me too.
“I really didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m sorry I disappeared. I just…” He sinks down to perch at the edge of the bed. “I didn’t trust myself to be around you and not give in to what I felt.”
“I thought I made it all up in my head.”
He stares at his hands. “You didn’t.”
Silence hangs between us.
I wish he’d told me. For so long, I felt like I’d done something wrong. That I was delusional.
I blow out a breath. “I’m man enough to admit that my pain back then wasn’t on you. And I’m not sure I would have made it to the league without your help.”
“You would have.”
Another thing we’ll have to disagree on.
He stands up. “You don’t owe me anything, and I’ll respect your need for space. I meant what I said out there. You’ve become a phenomenal player, and I am so proud of you for coming out.”
I feel years of tension seep from my shoulders. “Thank you.”
He nods.
“For real.” I step away from the door.
He meets my gaze. “You’re welcome.”
“Truce?” I offer.
He grins. “Yeah. You coming?”
I pull my phone out of my pocket. “I’ll meet you out there.”
I close the door and then try Salem again.
I get his voicemail. I wait a few minutes, then try him again with no luck.
Where are you?
The circle is brokenup when I return.
“We’re about to hit up that new spot along Highway 1. You rollin’?” Wes asks.
“Uh.” I turn to Sid. “You down?”
“Yeah. They’re hanging back.” He gestures to Ty and Ray across the patio.
“He’s good?” I ask.
“I don’t know,” Sid answers. “Seems East’s trade messed him up. Ty invited him after their game yesterday. He’ll help sort him out.”
