Page 56 of Ronan

Ronan clears his throat and collects the dishes from the table, talking to me over his shoulder as he fills the sink. “The water is hot if you want to shower while I clean.” The sharp, clipped tone of his voice makes my heart drop as I realize it’s the second time I’ve upset him today.

It takes a few seconds to chew, and I swallow only when I’m sure I won’t choke. “You’ve been doing all the work,” I argue. “Isn’t it my turn to take care of the cleanup?”

“I’ve got it, Cam.”

I heave a frustrated sigh as he finally meets my eyes again. “Let me dosomething.”

He stops scrubbing and gestures at the light above his head. “What you did is so far beyond washing dishes. Hot showers are possible because of you. The solar panels are working because ofyou. I couldn’t have accomplished that on my own.” He flashes me a sweet smile as I try not to swoon, then turns back to the sink. “Remember, though—I’m setting a curfew for the lights, and when the sun gets dark, so do they. We don’t need to be a beacon to raiders on the road.”

“That’s… uh, yeah, that’s fair.” I gather up my courage, licking my lips nervously as I study him, noticing how his clothes cling to his well-built physique. Black strands have escaped the loose knot on his head, falling around his face in a way that is effortlessly sexy. “We could, um, always conserve our water.”

Eyebrows pinched, he side-eyes me as he scrubs a plate. “Use as much as you want… the cold doesn’t bother me.”

“That’s not… that’s not what I’m saying. We could…conserve water.” I throw extra emphasis into the words like it’ll magically communicate what I refuse to say out loud.

Ronan puts his hands on his hips, turning to face me. “Are you having a stroke?”

Embarrassment courses through my veins as I purse my lips into a tight line, my cheeks flushing as those all-too-familiar fears surface. “Never mind,” I mutter, attempting to walk away when he catches my arm, and my defenses flare. “Let go of me.”

His irritation is palpable as he narrows his eyes at me, jaw clenched tight. “Not until you use your words. This is calledcommunicating, remember? It’s something adults do when they’re upset instead of storming off in a cloud of bottled-up teenage angst.”

“Oh, fuck you,” I snap, glaring as he watches me with the world’s most patient expression. “Don’t give me that holier than thou bullshit right now, acting like you’re Mister Perfect. It’s supposed to be a good night, and you just have to ruin it, don’t you?”

A visible crack fractures Ronan’s composure, webbing across his usual impenetrable surface. It’s a display of vulnerability I’ve never seen from him, and he reels, staggering away from me as though I’ve stabbed him. Regret almost brings me to my knees.

“Ronan,” I rasp, reaching for him, but he turns without a word, snatching the last dirty plate from the counter. His shoulders are tense as he scrubs, using anunnecessary amount of pressure as I stand here, not knowing what to do after being the world’s biggest jerk.

He does so much for me, never asking for anything in return, and my reaction is to be an asshole.

“Ronan.” My voice cracks and he pauses, but shakes his head without bothering to look at me.

“Go take your shower,” he says over his shoulder, each word tense. “By all means, don’t let me ruin your plans.”

My pride is a bitter taste in my mouth as I swallow hard, and walk over, placing a gentle hand on his elbow. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, but he keeps scrubbing the plate that I’m pretty sure was clean a minute ago.

“It’s fine.”Scrub, scrub, scrub.“Just go.”

Walk away,that little voice purrs in my ear.Leave him before he has the chance to leave you.

It would be so simple, wouldn’t it?

One foot in front of the other.

Ten steps, maybe less.

A terrified part of me wants to do it. It wants to take the easy way out, and escape into the hallway where I can disappear behind physical walls. Where I can put space between us.

Where I can hide.

That’s what a coward would do—allow him to push me away so I can blame him for it later. But it’s not that simple anymore, and I’m so tired of being afraid.

“Please stop assaulting that dish and look at me.”

His shoulders rise and fall in a few deep breaths before he sits the spotless plate in the drying rack. Arms crossed and face furious, he turns towards me. “Ronan, I’m sorry. When difficult topics come up, I either crack jokes orI sling insults because I don’t know how to handle being uncomfortable.”

“What could possibly be uncomfortable about you taking a fucking shower?” Anger lines his words, and I wince, but I can’t say I don’t deserve it. “Why does that make me the bad guy…again?”

“I was… trying to imply that you… take a shower, too.”

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