Page 41 of Ronan

“Of course I’m shutting you out!” I bellow, trying to rip my arm away and only causing his skin to burn against mine as it twists, leaving me even more furious. “What else do you want me to do when you’re acting like you don’t want me?!” Raw emotion cracks my voice, the words causing a stalemate as I whip my head away. Humiliated, I stare into the oppressive darkness.

Ronan hesitates, his grip loosening on my arm. His tone is infinitely gentler as he says, “If I let you go, are you going to run away?”

“No,” I mumble, not meeting his eyes.

“Will you attack me?” The image makes me scoff, as if I could do anything to hurt this tank of a man.

“No, Ronan, I’m not going to attack you.”

He releases my wrist and kneels on the floor beside me, so I’m staring at his stupid broad chest. “You believe I do not want you?”

My eyes flick to his before dodging away again. “Why didn’t you tell me you’d brought clothes?”

In my peripheral vision, he shakes his head, confused. “What is this fixation on my clothes?”

“Because!” I say in exasperation. “It means you considered leaving with me… that at least part of you wants to stay. But instead oftellingme that, you acted like you brought a bunch of shit to send me off on my own… like you were tossing me out so you could get on with your life without me in it.”

His eyes are growing wider as I take a deep breath, heat rising in my cheeks. A potent mix of anger and embarrassment burns on my skin, but I can’t seem to stop the onslaught of words rushing from my mouth. “And it should befine, Ronan! It should be fine, because I’ve been alone for so long. For-fucking-ever! But then you came along, and I let myself think aboutnotbeing alone anymore. I wouldn’t be alone because I’d be with you, and I realized that maybe I’m tired of being alone. And even though you’re infuriating andirritating, and sometimes a giant idiot—”

“Is there a point to this, or are you just wanting to insult me more?” His tone is sharp, but his eyes are soft, paradoxical as always.

My glare is angry before a sigh escapes, deflating me, and I bury my face in my hands as I try to hide from my own confession. “No one’s ever stuck around, Ronan. Not since my home was ripped away from me, and I let myself believe that this might be… thatwemight be different.” My hands drop onto my lap as I stare at the flickering light of the lantern reflecting off the walls. “But that’s the problem, isn’t it? In order for us to be different, we have to besomethingfirst.”

“Wearesomething,” he insists, sliding his hand over mine. Instinctively, I flip mine so our palms meet, lacing our fingers together, but I still can’t bring myself to meet his eyes. “How could we feel like this and not be?”

“I’m not good at talking to people, and most don’t bother trying to get past my prickly exterior. And ithurts.” My breath catches as my eyes burn. “It’s fucking brutal, knowing that it’s my fault… that it’smethat drives them away. Everyone leaves… everyone, but I don’t know how to change. I don’t know how to bebetter.Most days, I wish I didn’t have to be me anymore.”

“Who would you be if not… Cameron?” His voice is as gentle as it is curious, and the sincerity makes my vision blur with tears.

“Someone who’s easy to be around… who doesn’t chase others away. Someone who doesn’t end up alone.”

“You aren’t alone,” he whispers, squeezing my hand. “You aren’t going tobealone. I’m right here.”

“Yeah,” I mutter, swallowing past the giant lump in my throat. “You’re here. You’re here, and you broughtclothes… which means at least part of you thinks I’m worth the risk. But I don’t know how big that part is, Ronan, because you won’t tell me.”

He’s quiet as he absorbs my words. “By not telling you I’d packed them, you thought I’d changed my mind and was going to leave you?”

“Something like that,” I mutter.

Ronan’s hands are gentle this time as he pulls on mine, forcing us face to face. Begrudgingly, I meet his eyes and take in the tender thoughtfulness on his face. “You are a stupid human,” he says, so gently that the words don’t immediately register.

They click in my brain, and I jerk back, ready to fight, but he holds my arms steady. “I don’t want you to be easy, Cameron. Fight me, scream at me… you’ve got all that fire inside you. Don’t extinguish that for anyone.” Tears push their way to the surface, and I glance up at the ceiling to compose myself. “Do you think I went to all that trouble, risking everything to get you out of that prison, only to abandon you? Did youreallybelieve I could ever let you walk away from me? Cameron, you’ve been stuck with me since the minute I first saw you.”

My chestaches, but I cover it by narrowing my eyes, trying not to focus on the way my insides have turned to mush. “You said I could walk away, and you’d respect my decision.”

He shrugs, a sheepish grin on his face. “I never promised I wouldn’t follow to make sure you were safe.” As his grip loosens on my wrists, his smile melts, replaced by quiet curiosity. “You are okay with this? It is… what you want?”

“I want you to want it, too. I won’t be your burden.” Emotion clogs my throat as I force a few swallows to work past it.

“You are many things, Cameron, but never a burden.”

“Then I’ll ask one last time. Are you coming with me?”

“Yes,” he says without hesitation, and the weight on my chest lifts by a notch. “Nothing would make me happier.” He leans closer, letting his eyes drag across my face. I’m not sure what he sees in my eyes, but he lifts my hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to each knuckle, then flips it and places a final one on the pulse of my wrist. “I know there’s a lot to process right now, but we need to get moving. If you can collect your supplies in the house, I’ll take care of things outside.” I nod as he stands, understanding thatthingsmeans corpses.

“And Cameron?”

“Yeah?” I glance up to find him standing in front of me, staring down.

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