Page 27 of Ronan

“What else hurts?”

“Everything hurts.” My laugh is dry, but it dies in my throat as I catch the devastation on his face.

“I’m sorry I didn’t find you before that man laid his hands on you. If I would’ve known he was there…” His voice is low as he trails off, shame rolling from his words. “It was never my intention for you to get hurt, you must—”

“Hey, hey… I believe you,” I interrupt, grabbing his gloved hands with mine. “Ronan, look at me. I’m fine.”

“You arebleeding.” Eyes darting around my face, his lip pulls back in an angry sneer. “That is not fine. Nothing about this isfine.”

“No, but neither was that prison. And you got me out.” Despite the confusion I’m feeling about the entire situation, that much is undeniable. He risked everything for me—his safety, his freedom… his own fucking life. The other guards could’ve shot him, and likely would’ve, if he had been discovered helping me.

No one has ever taken a risk on me before.

A grateful smile spreads on my lips, and his head tilts as he stares at it, like there’s some deeper, hidden meaning he can’t decipher. “And you found my dog.” His lips twitch in a fleeting upturn, the start to a genuine smile that almost breaks through his mask, but it vanishes as he glances at my split lip again.

“Did you set those prisoners free? Was that part of the great escape?” Those dark eyes are shrouded by the dim, flickering light as they finally lift to find mine again.

“Ironically enough, no. My plan was to release some of the prisoners as a distraction, but it wasn’t supposed to happen for two more nights. Otherwise, I would have been better prepared. I had just located your dog a few hours prior, which is why I hadn’t visited today. One of the rebels broke through the rusty lock on their cell and killed a guard to steal the keys. Had I not rescued you tonight, our plans would’ve been ruined, and that was a risk I was unwilling to take.”

He stares at the floor for a stretch before he clears his throat. “Are you upset with me for killing that man?”

“Who, Bruce?” I ask in surprise, and he nods. “Fuck no, that bastard deserved it.” When he doesn’t answer, I wrap my fingers around his chin and lift his face to mine. “Ronan, he was an evil man who did a lot of terrible things, not just to me. The world is better off without him. If I’d been able to kill him myself, I would have… but I didn’t have to, did I?”

His gaze drops to my mouth before it lands on my eyes again, and he shakes his head. “No.”

“And why is that?”

The roll of his eyes is such a human gesture that it makes me huff a laugh, and a hesitant grin tries to pull on his lips. “Because I did it for you.”

“That’s right, because you took care of it for me.” I lift on my toes, pressing a kiss on his cheek that barely misses the corner of his mouth. His lips separate in a sharp breath as he stares at me. “Never apologize for saving me, okay?”

Ronan’s head tilts again as he searches for any signs of a lie, then he finally nods. He leans closer as I feel my inhibitions waving goodbye, unable to look away from his throat as it bobs in a swallow.

“I have to return to the base,” he says, and it’s a bucket of ice water over my head, sobering me as I take a stumbling step back.

He’s leaving.

Of course he’s leaving.

You’re not worth staying for.Panic coils its insistent hand around my neck, not squeezing yet, just letting me know it’s there, waiting and ready to steal my breath.

“There are things I have to handle, and I need to make sure Elas is okay.”He gestures towards the bag he placed on the ground as my pulse speeds up, that panic reaching down my throat and taking root in my stomach. “There is enough food and water for several days, a change of clothes that should be close to your size, a knife, and more matches. It isn’t much, but it’s what I could grab on short notice.”

He doesn’t pick up on my conflict as he continues. “It might be a few days before I can return, but I’ll gather more supplies and some things for the dog, too. Will you…” One side of his lips pulls between his teeth as he trails off, deflating. His enormous presence is diminished as he stares at his feet, uncertain in a way I wouldn’t expect from such a fierce man.

For a few precious moments, he feels human, and that’s more dangerous than any weapon he could wield.

“Will I…?” I nudge when he doesn’t continue, trying to keep my turbulent emotions contained. His eyes dart to mine, before returning to the floor. Despite my frustration, the way he kicks at the ground and shuffles between his feet is endearing. This six-foot-five lethal killing machine that snapped a man’s neck with his bare hand is nervous about talking to me.

That hand that’s capable of crushing a windpipe is nervously picking at the leather of his sleeve, and it almost makes me forget who—and what—he really is.

“Will you be here when I come back?” he finally asks.

His eyes land on mine as I hesitate, but I don’t want to lie to him.Will you even come back?I want to ask, but those aren’t the words that form on my tongue. “I don’t know,” I say instead.

Disappointment flashes over his face before he glances away with a brief nod. “That’s fair.”

“Is it?” He takes a deep breath before he meets my eyes again. “Fair,” I mutter with an abrupt laugh, fisting my hands to draw the tension from my shoulders. “Not much in my life has ever been fair, Ronan. I never expected this to be any different.”