Page 66 of The Hookup Situation

I’m struggling to sleep, or eat, or pay attention in class, and my final exams are going to suffer for it, I know. I’m studying as much as I can, but it’s difficult to focus. I’ve spent minimal time with Rory and Lucy, and when I am with them I know I’m not myself.

I get a text from Lucy, inviting me to the Christmas party she and her roommates are throwing right before break. I tell her I’ll be there because I need to get out again, and if I don’t show up I know she and Rory will come find me.

The invitation says to invite friends, so they must be expecting quite the crowd. I have a sinking feeling in my stomach that Preston will probably be there, and with how persistent he’s been about wanting to talk to me I don’t think there will be much avoiding him. Him showing up on my doorstep I did not expect. Hell, I honestly didn’t expect him to text or call as much as he did either, and I don’t understand why he hasn’t given up yet. I’m not worth all this.

I get a message from Rory, too, telling me that the art show is coming up and that he’d love for me to come see his work. Of course I’ll be there, no matter how I feel, because it’s Rory.

So when Thursday night rolls around I dress in black slacks, a black dress shirt and do my best job on my makeup. My eyes have dark circles under them and my hair won’t cooperate. I apply some makeup under my eyes to try and hide the circles as best I can.

I give up trying to make my hair look perfect because I don’t want to be late and I’m honestly too damn depressed to put more effort into it. So, with my earrings and rings in place and my coat and shoes on, I head out the door to meet up with Lucy and Parker.

It’s dark outside when I arrive, and I see a crowd gathered inside through the floor to ceiling windows, and more people on the sidewalk and in the parking lot heading that way. The snow is lit up by the streetlights that are lighting the pathway leading to the door, and I see Lucy step out of her car as I make my way inside. I meet her in the entryway and she gives me a hug and a kiss.

“You okay?” she asks, probably noticing my tired eyes and imperfect hair. Or the fact that I can’t seem to make myself smile lately. “You’ve been a little different, lately.”

“I’m okay,” I tell her. “Just tired, and lots of finals that wore me out.” I think I managed to get decent grades, but it was an exhausting couple of weeks, and I’m not at all looking forward to spending Christmas alone in my apartment. “Looking forward to the party tomorrow.” I manage a small grin.

Her eyebrows furrow but I speak again before she can. “You look good.” Her coat is open now and she’s dressed in a hunter green dress that falls to her knees and has a deep v in the front, showing off her cleavage tastefully. Her hair is down and she has snowflake earrings in her ears and a matching necklace.

“Thank you,” she tells me.

I’m saved from having to talk anymore when Parker shows up and grins as he makes his way towards us. Lucy hugs him and kisses his cheek, and when he looks at me he has the same concern on his face that she does. I don’t say anything, just stand with my hands in my pockets.

“You okay?” he asks, and god I’m getting really sick of that question. What do they want me to say?“No my life is shit right now,”right before Rory’s show? Even if I wanted to tell them, now isn’t the time or the place, so I nod.

My phone buzzes then and I take it out, only to see that it’s a message from Preston. God, I wish he’d stop trying to get me to answer him because I’m about to give in, and I can’t.

Ken doll: Please talk to me, I miss you so much

I swallow and my cheeks heat as I slide the phone back in my pocket without answering yet again, and we make our way through the crowded hallway, filled with different pieces of art; drawings, paintings, photographs and more. I am looking forward to seeing Rory’s piece, because I know what a talented artist he is and that it will be amazing, but I get distracted by my phone once more and let Lucy and Parker take the lead as I trail behind them, checking my messages again.

Ken doll: Tinkerbell?

Ken doll: If we’re done, at least say goodbye to me in person i deserve that much

I don’t realize how absorbed I am in my phone until I hear a hushed, “Jackson Bardot, if you’re looking for Grindr hookups right now I’m gonna cut off your balls.”

I blink and look up to see Lucy standing there, scowling at me.

“It's not Grindr,” I tell her. She scowls harder.

“What are you doing? Can’t whatever it is wait until later? This is Rory’s night.”

She’s right, and I’m being a complete dick. I silence my phone and put it away.

“I’m sorry,” I say, looking over at where Rory is standing with Parker.

“Don’t apologize to me. Go over there and congratulate Rory.”

I make my way over to Rory and manage a smile as I hug him. “I’m sorry I’m being an asshole,” I apologize.

“It’s okay.”

“No it’s not. Things are fucked up right now, but you’re my best friend and tonight is your night. I’m really proud of you, babe.”

Rory gives a small smile, but I can tell he and Lucy are worried about me. I admire the watercolor he did of Parker, lying on his stomach in bed, the sheet draped over him, covering his bottom half and exposing his top half to the sun pouring through the bedroom window. It’s stunning.

We leave after looking at a few more pieces, and when we say goodnight they both tell me they’ll see me tomorrow at the party at Lucy’s.

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