Page 88 of Red Flag, Green Light

I snort.

Okay. Yeah. Never mind. I can do whatever I want. This’ll makesomemoney at least, and it probably won’t be so off-brand that it breaks anything permanently. Who knows? Maybe it will actually unlock access to the starved minority desperate to see tall girls and modestly-shouldered men in literature.

I’ll check in with Liam, the CEO of Whirlwind Branding, just to make sure before I push any buttons, but I truly cannot fathom that the girlies are gonna be less on board for this than they are for Flag Day.

My MMC is a man doing pushups in order to attain his love’s impossible body standards. That’s gotta mean something to the girlies.

I’ve been at it about a month myself, and I’ve basically lost all feeling in my upper body. The girlies love a man who suffers.

Speaking of suffering…I’ve only done thirty today when I need seventy-two, min. If I don’t get more done, I may not physically be able to space them out in the remaining day, so…

I drop. And give myself twenty.

Chapter Twenty-five

Skies and sharks.

Ceres

“You’re practically twins,” Mars says, so I stop puffing out my cheeks and staring intently at his hamster. Tonight, apparently, isdate nightfor his brother, so I have once again been invited into the Rogue household, this time—I can only assume—to meet Gingerbread, and be regaled by shark facts.

It is, of course, all worth it considering…

I sniff. “Don’t be so mean to me while I’m mourning Jove’s availability.”

Mars’s shoulders droop. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were still keeping that gag running. Since it’s been. You know. An hour.”

An hour of joy. An hour of bliss. An hour of twitching eyes. And shark facts. So many shark facts. It’s honestly a skill I’ve managed to squeeze any Jove lamentation into the cracks betweendid you know that the hammerhead shark has 360 degree vision?andthey also are known for giving birth to live pups, not laying eggs.

The evening has proceeded roughly as follows:

He says,Did you know that some sharks lay eggs?

And I reply,Did you know that I’m very saddened by the ratio of shoulders in this household at present?

Super fun.

Having a great time.

“Jove’s date night…” I sigh, deeply, and pet Gingerbread’shead while she searches my hand for more treats to stuff in her cheeks. “Withnot me. Woe. Sorrow. The only ideal male specimen in my vicinity has been taken off the market. What will I do now? Go to Indiana and beg on Brian’s doorstep?”

Mars rolls his eyes and puts the plastic sharks he’s been playing with back in the massive glass enclosure, also known as his hamster’s home. The sprawling five-billion gallon tank takes up a significant chunk of his modest living room. Glancing my way, he mutters, “Particularly intent on chipping down my confidence, aren’t you?”

“What can I say? I like my men broken.”

He tugs on my necklace, eliciting a smile when the chain pinches. Melting, he says, “Mischievous princess.” He kisses the lock before freeing me and scooping Gingerbread from my hands. “Back into your shark tank, little one.”

The second her paws meet the fluffy ground of her tank, she jets toward a hovel she’s built down into the terrain and begins unloading her cheeks in a nest visible against the glass. “She’s storing her booty,” I say. “Like a little pirate.”

“No. No pirates.”

“You don’t like pirates?”

“Pirates hunted and ate sharks.”

My brows rise. “Did they really?”

“According to the sources I’ve found, many did. But, even barring that, pirates in our current age should be shot. Or tortured.” Mars narrows his eyes on Gingerbread’s nest. “Both.”

---