Page 127 of Falling in Love with A Tiny Bat

If I’m honest, I’ve played with souls before.

As a creature that steals, it’s all too simple to toy with the frail wills of humans unnoticed, so I have—now and again—unraveled a few, drained my fill of life’s heavier emotions from them, and put them back with renewed hope.

It is no surprise that Zahra’s soul puts everything else I haveever felt to shame.

It was so…beautiful. Even weighed down by life’s troubles and trials and the terrors she never should have had to bear, love saturated every inch.

I want it more desperately than I have ever wanted anything before. Not that such a thing wasn’t the case before I had a taste…

Now, however, I fear my obsession shall consume me.

Turning my head, I risk losing my heart as my eyes make out the dark shape of my soulmate.

She’s barely a dim outline beneath the covers on the other side of the bed. So, painfully, far away. Blissfully slumbering and oblivious to my plight.

It’s for the best.

I return my attention to the distant black chasm of the ceiling.

Were I able to see through the shadows like Pollux, how would I contain myself? And if a lock of Zahra’s hair were out of place, how would I stop myself from fixing it? And if my gloveless finger were to graze her skin unexpectedly…

Nope.

I wouldn’t survive.

A third breakdown when I’m this tired is not recommended. Zero out of five stars.

I am a strong, independent, about-to-be-one-year-old. I should only be havingonebreakdown a day. As Willow would say, that is the reasonable amount.

She has previously advised me to make the most of my singular allotted breakdown by letting it last hours. Truly a visionary.

I wonder if she’s awake.

Reaching blindly toward my nightstand, I tap my phone screen and squint into the brilliance of my black lock screen.Even with the brightness turned all the way down, it is painful.

It is also three in the morning.

I haven’t slept for a second.

Whenever I close my eyes, there are…picturesin my brain that refuse to abate.

They involve Zahra and situations I’m positive would be sensory nightmares. As a rule, I’m against touch. Yet anytime Zahra grazes me, it’s like a little blessing igniting my nerves. She fills a pit of bleak contradictions inside me.

Struggling with food and touch, after all, does in no way mean I don’t crave either.

A shaking inhale rises and falls, bringing tears to my eyes. Hand trembling, I spread my fingers against my stomach.

The protein shakes and liquid diet has helped so much, but having a real meal? Having multiple platefuls? Eating until I feltfull? Life will never be the same.

I’m not hungry.

For the first time in my existence, I am tempering the sensation of digestion over the pain of starvation while I try to sleep.

Does feeling food digest suck? Sure. But at least it doesn’t hurt. Keeping my mind on the way Zahra’s soul felt almost erases the sensations, too.

It was so pretty and tempting in my hands, slithering through my fingers like a pure ream of silk.

My soulmate really is an angel.

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