Page 32 of Forget Me Not

“It’s habit.” Cal did not seem very sorry.

Ray glanced at him again, thinking about how fairies apparently sparkled more, for certain people. About how Ray had been “taken” long before he’d admitted it, according to his mother. “Habit?” he finally wondered aloud.

“First, to get your attention.” Cal lowered his voice. “Then just… something we do.”

Ray looked away. He gestured to the whiteboard, the note about the soda. “I think you already have my attention.”

Cal perked up. “So I do. But it’s still fun to get you riled. Maybe more fun, because now you know I mean it.” He studied Ray until Ray couldn’t pretend he wasn’t.

“What?”

“I think…” Cal hesitated, then tossed his head. “Lie back and close your eyes. Sleep like the doctors and Cassandra suggested.”

“What if—” Ray bit it off. He shifted around, falling deeper into the cushions like he might if he planned to sleep.

“Hmm.” Cal was far too thoughtful. “If I sit here long enough, you’ll probably fall asleep no matter what.”

Ray shot him a narrow-eyed look.

“Oh, what, like I wasn’t supposed to know that you’ll feel safe around me and your exhaustion will take over? Pfft.” Cal seemed to remember the food next to him and poured some chocolate-covered peanuts into his palm before tossing them back. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said as he crunched.

“You can be still like that?” Ray didn’t mean it to be offensive. But fairies were known for forgetting tasks or wandering off in the middle of them, losing interest in one thing only to become obsessed with something else in the span of a few minutes.

Cal didn’t seem offended. “Honestly? I can when I really try. Sometimes. But it helps to have a distraction, music or whatever. Busy work. I think it’s why so many fairies knit. It’s something that keeps our brains occupied so we can pay attention to other stuff. And I really am tired. I didn’t have nearly enough calories today.”

“Distraction?” Ray frowned at him curiously. “A sensory distraction?”

“Yeah?” Cal frowned back at him when Ray got up. But Ray went over to his desk, which was all neat lines and clear surfaces except for the row of toys on one shelf. He hadn’t seen knitting supplies anywhere. But he’d seen these.

He selected one and returned to the couch to hand it over to Cal, who accepted it with the tiniest flicker of a smile.

“Not the puzzle cube. You picked the clicky one?” he asked, then moved his thumb to toggle a button that was not unlike a light switch, although all it did was make a clicking sound.

“Does it normally bother me?” Ray sat back in his spot at the far end of the couch, watching Cal idly turn the toy over in his hand and click the button as it went.

“Weirdly no. I think you tune it out. Or just register it as, like,Callalily background noise. I thought it might bother you tonight, though. But… thank you.” Cal beamed at him and continued to spin and click his toy, his laptop ignored in front of him.

“Will that be enough?” Ray wasn’t sure he could sleep with the TV on. Not now.

“Sometimes you curl up on the rug and I rest my feet in your fur,” Cal offered, and likely noticed Ray’s soft flinch. “But I doubt you want to feel that exposed right now.”

The growl was low and involuntary.

“Ray, it’s okay.”

“No.” Ray glared out at the backyard. Not at Cal. “I don’t like not knowing you. I can’t protect you. I can’t figure out what you’ll want.”

“Oh. Oh, that is… um. All right. Ray. Lay down. Lie down? Lie down,” Cal finished, firmly. “This couch is big enough. Lie down and try to rest, and I will tell you something to soothe your wolfy nerves.”

Ray scanned the darkness of the yard one last time, gave a bossy half-fairy an annoyed glance, then arranged himself on his side on the couch, his knees bent so his head did not reach the curl of Cal’s legs underneath him.

Cal said, “Oh,” again, and then, “I thought you’d lie the other way.” Then, softly, leaning over to peer down at Ray, “I’m not giving up my happiness for some paltry magic. You are mine as long as you want me, Ray Ray.”

Ray turned to meet Cal’s bright, swirling stare. It was not paltry magic to do this. But they both knew that, so Ray left it unsaid. “I wouldn’t want you to beg again.”

Cal raised his eyebrows, but then acquiesced with a nod. “You didn’t the first time, either. You were more confused than I realized at the time. And I think… you thoughtyouwould be the one to beg. Although I don’t know if you would have thought that if you’d had another wolf for your mate.”

Ray shut his eyes tight but could not control his colors.