Page 42 of Harmony

“What’s wrong? You’re not acting normal.”

My heart clenches at the concern in his voice. I’m used to the venom. The hatred he normally harbors. For half a second, I consider that he might still care about me.

I shake my head. “Why do you care?”

“Status quo. If I broke you, then fine, but I’d need to find another target and I’m not quite done with you yet.”

My heart shatters. Of course, that’s what he means. I’m his toy to play with. Even as much as I hate the games he plays, the thought of him finding someone new to torment kills me.

“Of course. What was I thinking?” I barely hold back a sniffle from the emotion clogging my throat. “I’m fine, now move.”

I press on his chest, but he holds steady. I try to ignore the feel of the hard planes beneath his shirt, but it’s hard.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing. I’m tired from whoring myself out. College is expensive, you know,” I offer flippantly.

I hate playing this role.

His eyes harden. “If that’s the case, then I’ll pay for your college. All I ask for is lifetime blow jobs and anal. No way I want to touch that used-up pussy.”

My entire body stiffens as I feel the tears prick my eyes. I know he hates me. I know he wants to hurt me. I can know everything in the world, but it still doesn’t stop the hurt.

This man. The same man who caressed my hair while I slept. Who jumped into a pool and saved my ass.

I pull my bottom lip into my mouth, biting it briefly before releasing it.

“All right. What a great deal I’m getting. A lifetime of being used by a man I once respected. Let’s do it. Fuck it.” My sarcastic tone isn’t lost on him. I can tell by the way his eyes widen slightly.

I lean forward, not giving him a moment to reconsider, kissing him right on the lips. His whole body freezes. He doesn’t move as I pepper kisses on his face, my own tears finally spilling over.

“This is what you want, right?” I continue kissing his jaw. “You want me to be your little sex slave?” I start to kiss down his chest. “All right, master.”

I fall to my knees in front of him, hastily undoing his belt. He grabs my hands, stopping me. I try to slap his away, hiccupping as I try to take a deep breath.

He doesn’t let me. He leans down, picking me up from under my armpits, pushing me back against the wall.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Hails?”

I let my head fall forward on his chest, letting one single sob loose. Then I take a deep breath and count to ten. I do it two more times before I pull back and stare at Nate.

“Never think that you can buy a woman like that. Now move,” I demand as I shove him.

He steps back, his wall of hatred falling away, leaving only confusion.

“Hailee, wait. Tell me what’s wrong.”

I throw a look over my shoulder. “Everything.”

Then I leave him in that closet, rushing to the bathroom to cry in solitude.

I thought I could handle this, but as the days pass, I feel like I’m no closer to answers. I’m no closer to the light at the end of the tunnel. The further I go, the more I start to consider there isn’t one there. That I’m doomed to stay in this cycle until I graduate.

“Fuck,” I cry into my hands, letting the emotion flow.

I’m truly fucked.

Sixteen

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