Page 56 of Bang Buddies With Benefits
Hello, I was doing my best to be nice, so why was he taunting me to stand up and punch him in the face? Did hewanta black eye in his wedding pictures?
My phone chimed, and I whipped it out, like it might be her.
Then I got a look at the alert and fought the urge to throw it to the ground. Yay me for being responsible and setting a reminder about her work party. I’d even thought I could show it to Julia as proof if I needed to cut this rehearsal short, so thanks again, karma.
I shoved my phone in my pocket, and when both Noah and Julia continued to stare, I let out a sigh. “Look, I’m here, and I’m not creating drama. What more do you want from me?”
“To learn the dance steps,” Julia said.
“For you to stop moping like you can’t do anything about it and go tell Catalina how you feel,” Noah said at the same time, his longer statement echoing through the room and reverberating through my hollow chest.
“How I feel is that we were fuck buddies, and that was great. Now we’re not, and that sucks. But as Julia’s heard so many times that I’m sure she’s sick to death of it, I’m not the type of guy who settles down.”
She sighed this time, even louder than I’d done, and I gestured to her.
“See? Happy now, Noah? Now I hurt her feelings, and this time, you can point a finger at yourself for starting the drama.”
“That’s not why I’m sighing.” Julia sat in the chair next to me and let her head fall back, looking to the ceiling of the dance studio to save her, but all that was there was some shriveled balloon that some kid probably cried over losing. I wasn’t sure whether that was incredibly sad, or if I should commend it for not giving up the fight. After all, kids cried and were a pain, and who needed or wanted that. “I can’t believe you’re going to make me say it.”
“I’m an asshole, I get it.” I wiggled the ends of my fingers, egging her on. At this point, it’d be oddly comforting to hear about how I couldn’t pull off love if I tried. “Go ahead and tell me all about it. If you want to get your sisters to join in…”
“Did I hear right?” Joy and June showed up out of nowhere, eagerness shining through their features. “We’ve got the green light to roast Zac?”
“No.” Not a surprise coming from Jeremy, but the fact that Julia said it at the same time had me doing a double take.
Joy’s shoulders sagged. “Fine. At this point, it’d just feel like kicking someone who’s down, anyway. I’d rather save my big swing for when he gets up and is least expecting it.”
“Remember how we discussed this in the waiting room at the hospital, and we’ve decided that watching him go into anaphylactic shock was scary, and we all want him to be okay?” Julia asked, and Jeremy nodded. Clearly, they were the ring leaders and June and Joy were yet to get onboard. At any other time, I’d consider it a win, but nothing felt like a win right now.
Julia shooed away her unhelpful siblings and then pivoted to face me. “What I mean is… I spent our entire relationship waiting for you to look at me the way you looked at Catalina.”
I opened my mouth to deny it. To tell my ex that it was only based on our sexual connection and not what she was making it out to mean. But then I’d be insulting her and Catalina at the same time and, despite everything, I couldn’t bring myself to do that to either of them.
“Admittedly, I was beginning to see the allure of settling down, but in the end, I understand all too well how you feel. Because that’s not what Catalina wanted. Not with me.”
“That doesn’t make any sense. Her affection was on display for not just us to see, but the entire waiting room at the hospital to see. You don’t freak out like that if you’re not afraid of losing someone.”
Everyone in the room agreed.
Damn my lungs for deflating and just hanging there, useless in my chest. “That wasn’t about me. She was engaged before, to this guy she grew up with. A drunk driver struck him while they were in the crosswalk together, and he didn’t make it. The memories of him were what was causing her to panic, not me and my stupid shellfish allergy.”
Julia, Noah, and Jeremy all exchanged bewildered glances. At this point, I needed the boost to my ego, but since I’d lost the one woman who’d turned my life upside down and made me rethink everything, it didn’t do anything but deflate it more.
“What did she say after you told her you were in love with her?” Julia asked, eyes narrowing on me. “What were her exact words?”
I did my best impression of a fish out of water, my mouth opening and closing over and over. Not because Julia somehow knew I hadn’t completely copped up to my feelings—Catalina left before I got to that point—but this was too surreal. “Why are you being nice to me right now? Shouldn’t you be high-fiving karma?
“Um, hello. The wedding. Ensuring everything’s perfect. I already had to change the entire menu because of you—”
I lifted my finger, planning on mentioning I wasn’t exactly to blame in that situation, but her glare had me zipping my lip.
“But the waltz is a Carrington tradition, and as I live and breathe, it’s going to be perfect. Not everything’s about you, you know.”
I did but didn’t dare say so. “What I meant to say was thank you for not rubbing it in my face and ensuring I don’t keel over at the wedding.”
“That’s more like it. Now, spill the details. You’ve got two twitterpated gay guys and my female perspective to help. Surely we can help even someone like you get to the bottom of this so we can move on.”
Even more shocking than her willingness to help, was the laugh that almost came out over the way she’d worded it. As if she were going to make me pay the entire time she helped me, and I didn’t even care because I could use all the help I could get.
