Page 7 of Love's a Glitch
I bit at my thumbnail,debating how much to share. Did I let him know that I was a hot commodity? Would that stoke or stifle his interest? If there was, in fact, interest.
Me:That update from hell upended several of my exes. Some got upset and reminded me why things didn’t work out, but a few claimed to want another chance, and I’m considering giving them one.
To preventmyself from gnawing my nails, I picked up a pen and performed a mini drum solo on my knee.
Luke:Sounds like an interesting turn of events. Let me know how that goes.
Disappointment surged forward,tugging the corners of my mouth from a smile to a frown.
Me:For all I know, it’s going to be a huge disaster. But I survived last night’s shitshow and figured I’d ride it out. You’re not the only one diving headfirst into an adventure without thinking.
Luke:Oh, I always think it through beforehand. Safety first.
Me:Says the guy with his leg dangling over the edge of a cliff.
Oops.I’d inadvertently admitted to studying his photo, and I couldn’t tell if that hinted at my interest or showed too much, andgah,I needed to put together a game plan involving the newsletter I’d subscribed to. Time to sign off so I didn’t make things worse.
Me:Gotta go. Have a good Sunday, not-Dillon.
Luke:Hey, now. You know my name.
Thanks to his voice memo,I imagined him saying the words in the same deep timbre that’d caused goose bumps. My skin prickled again, and while he clearly had an ego, he also hadn’t been wrong about his charming voice. I’d heard it now, and I wanted more.
Not following the advice of the dating experts had gotten me jack and shit thus far, so I forced myself to follow the tips I’d read in the newsletter. If I was going to try this re-dating thing, I might as well rethink my methods too. As my history teacher father loved to say, “Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”
I was so sick and tired of spinning circles when it came to dating, as though my love life were a twisted version ofGroundhog Day, only with different, less-funny Bill Murrays. Honestly, I didn’t find the original version that funny, but that might be my disklike of that movie bleeding through. I despised wastes of time and anything that resulted in losing my work, and lived for the high that accompanied a big accomplishment. Give me progress or give me death.
Me:Goodbye, Luke. Text you later.
I addedthree extra emojis in the name of remaining mysterious, and because I couldn’t help myself, then went to pick out an outfit for my coffee date with Andrew, the guy who’d responded to last night’s debacle of texting with the ever ominous: “Can we talk?”
4
Ellie
Me:Date was a BUST.
Luke:Uh-oh. What happened?
Me:It’s too embarrassing.
Luke:Come on. You can tell me. We don’t know any of the same people, so you know your secret’s safe with me. You wouldn’t have texted if you didn’t need to tell somebody.
He had me there.Icouldtell my friends; it’d just be mortifying and awkward, and piss off Cat in so, so many ways. Right now, finding a salvageable man from my discard pile seemed like the most likely way to come up with an eventual full house. Between my older brother, my two stepsisters, and my little brother, our house growing up had been chaotic and fun, and I’d loved it. Add in the five kids between them, and family events were full of laughter, disorder, and love. I wanted that in my future.
I’d swum in the online dating pool for years—hitting it especially hard this past one—and the waters, they were choppy, and I was exhausted, and I just wanted to cling to my life preserver of hope.
Me:I thought safety first in a coffee shop involved checking the lid to avoid the spilling of hot liquids. Are you familiar with Oedipus?
Luke:That motherfucker? LOL. Yeah, I’ve heard of him.
I snorted a laugh,nearly choking on my gulp of soda. Okay, so Luke was familiar with the tragic Greek story of the dude who ended up marrying his own mother. My dating life wasn’t quite that level of tragic, but I felt like it could totally be found among the unsettling stories of Greek yore.
Me:I considered using the hot coffee to “gouge” my eyes out after Andrew told me that he was in love with one of my best friends. As he put it, he could tell Cat would be a freak in the sheets and more accepting of his kink—and no, I didn’t ask—and then requested I help hook them up.
Luke:Noooooo
Me:I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried. Adventures in Redating is off to a rocky start. ??
