Page 64 of Anatomy of a Player

“Please,” he said, curling his hand around my shoulder. “I’m trying to not screw this up here.”

I nodded. “Yeah. Of course.”

He let out a relieved sigh. “Thank you.”

We scrambled to find our clothes, he gave me one more kiss, and then he was gone.

I stared at the closed door, still in shock from going from about to have sex to standing alone in my apartment.

I was starting to see the tiniest bit what athletes meant when they talked about how much of their lives they devoted to the game.

Did they deserve extra perks?

Well, I wasn’t sure they didn’tnotdeserve it. Which made it feel like I suddenly didn’t know anything anymore.

Chapter Thirty-Six

Whitney

Just as I was about to stop staring at the door, the knob turned and the door cracked open. My heart leaped in my chest.Hudson must’ve decided to forget practice, consequences be damned.

Instead, Lyla walked through, and I realized that had Hudson and I continued taking things where they were going, my roommate would’ve witnessed way more of me and Hudson than any of us wanted.

“So, judging from Hudson’s crumpled appearance, my hypothesis is that he was making out with a certain roommate of mine before rushing off to practice.” Lyla dropped her backpack on the floor and unwound the scarf around her neck. “Not that I’m judging. I’m just wondering if I should ask for details, or remind you of your objective. Basically I want to know how to best be your friend right now.”

“Well, I’m about to explode with details, but I also have a really important question I need to ask, so maybe you could listen first and then we can go from there?”

Bless her, she didn’t hesitate, just moved over to me and gave me her full attention.

“Would Beck leave for a practice when there was an imminent possibility of sex?” I bit my thumbnail, hoping the answer wouldn’t hurt me.

“He would leave for practice even if there was a tornado headed straight for the arena.”

“Oh good.” I put my hand over my heart. “I was a bit paranoid that I wasn’t…exciting enough.” Hudson had told me I was beautiful—that I was perfect. I’d believed him in the moment, so I wasn’t sure why doubt had to rise up and make me question everything.

Probably because I always got wrapped up in a guy’s nice words and then my judgment became more and more cloudy until I was somehow surprised when the storm came.

“So? Details?” Lyla asked.

“Oh yes. Wait, we’re going to need ice cream for this.” I rushed to the freezer, grabbed the nearest carton—rocky road—and two spoons, and carried it back to the couch. Whether we were miserable or celebrating, Lyla and I dealt the same way. Ice cream.

I popped open the lid, dug out a spoonful, and between bites I told Lyla about running into Hudson on campus, the hour he’d spent explaining the ins and outs of hockey, making out on the couch, and then the stupid alarm. “But he promised he’d make up for it tomorrow. Said he’d take me out and everything.”

Lyla pressed her lips together and tapped her spoon against them.

“What?” I asked, even though I was sure I didn’t want to know.

“That sounds like more than sex.”

“Remember, there was no sex,” I said. It was pretty muchallI could remember right now.

She tilted her head and gave me that intense Lyla look. “You know what I mean. It sounds more like hang outs that lead to relationships. It sounds like being upset when he doesn’t call.”

“You don’t think he’ll call?” Whoa. That came out way more high-pitched than I’d meant it to, but honestly, it matched the panicky sensation echoing through my chest.

Lyla leaned forward, placing a hand on my shoulder. “No, I think he will. I’m not saying he won’t, even after. I’m saying there are strings being attached all over the place.”

“Okay, so maybe there are a few. But because of my job, it’s not like we could officially date right now anyway.”

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