Page 64 of Never Have I Ever
Grayson
I can’t believe she did drugs. What was she thinking?
When she asked me for them back at the lake, I didn’t think that if I denied her, she would find them from someone else. Who gave her edibles anyway? Is it some other guy that she's seeing? Ben Reed? He'd be the type. The thought repulses me. The idea of her going to somebody else to help her with something that I wouldn't makes me sick.
Jesus, the sight of her crying and bloodshot eyes almost killed me. I felt like I was back there, seeing him convulse on the ground while I watched it happen, feeling completely useless.
I wasn’t going to let this happen again. Last time I didn’t do anything, but this time it’s different. I’m going to do everything I can to help her. I’m going to get her through this, and I won’t let anything happen to her.
I pick up her small hand and grasp it in mine, feeling it shake as I drag her to the bathroom. The last time I was here, I left her in the shower and left her apartment. But not this time. This time, I’m staying with her for as long as she needs me to.
I turn on the faucet and fill the bath up. I sit her on the toilet lid and start to strip off her clothes. Her breathing seems to have calmed down a lot more, so maybe she’s feeling better now, knowing she was just hallucinating.
I can't help but think of her here alone with no one to help her while she was experiencing a bad high the first time that she tried drugs. When I called her, and it went straight to voicemail, I knew something was wrong. I just didn’t expect it to be this. Thank God that asshole concierge from last time wasn’t here.
The bath fills up, and I dip my hand, making sure the temperature is right.
I hold her hand, guiding her inside the bath. When she’s in and covered by the soapy water, I exhale. Letting out a breath from deep inside my lungs. She relaxes into the bath and closes her eyes, letting her head fall back.
We don’t talk. I let her sit there, making her body relax and trying to calm her down. She had a huge panic attack from the hallucination. I hate the fact that she was going through that alone.
When she’s done with the bath, I wrap her up in her towel, dry her off, and help her to her bed. I close all of the blinds, making the room as dark as possible, and get her underneath her sheets.
She drifts off to sleep almost instantly, probably not even aware of my presence. She seems fine. She doesn’t look like she’s panicking anymore, but I can’t leave her. I won’t leave her. Not again.
I sit on her bed, looking down at her face, feeling a knot the size of a rock stuck in my throat. It scared the fuck out of me to see her like that.
I don’t know how much time has passed, exactly. I know it’s been hours, but to me, it felt like minutes. I spent the whole time staring down at her with only the dim lamp to light up the room, making sure she was breathing and alive and that she was okay.
But when her eyes open and she stretches her arms over her head, with a cute little sound, I exhale so hard. She’s fine. She’s okay.
She turns and squints when she sees me lying next to her. “Good morning.”
My chest hurts. I smile at her, tucking her hair behind her ear. “It’s two am, angel.”
“Oh,” she says. “Good night, then.”
I choke out a laugh and lean in to kiss her forehead. “Good night.” I pull back and scan her face, worry settling in. “How are you feeling?” I ask.
She lets out a breath. “Good.” Her face falls, a frown replacing her smile from before. “It was so scary,” she tells me, making my chest tense. “I felt like I was going crazy.”
I cradle her against me, hugging her tight to me. “It was just a hallucination. You’re okay, Rosie.”
She nods against my chest, and I pull her chin up to look at me. “Promise me, you won’t ever do that again,” I tell her. “Please, Rosie. I can’t take it.”
She nods again, her eyes shining in the dim room. “I promise.”
I let out a breath of relief and kiss her forehead again and again. She lifts her head and places her soft lips against mine. Fuck, it feels so good. Just kissing her feels amazing. Having her lips on mine, feeling her breath mix with mine as she wraps her hand around my neck and pulls me closer to her.
I slide my tongue in her mouth, tasting her, licking her up like she’s dessert. Her hips bump up and scrape against my dick. That brings me back to reality, and I hum into her mouth as I pull back.
I’m already shaking my head. “No, Rosie. We can’t.”
“Why not?”
I’m asking myself the same question as I run a hand down my face. “You’ve just been through something traumatic. You need to take it easy.”
She closes her eyes and tips her head back into the pillow as she sighs. “I’m getting sick of being rejected,” she says. With that, she opens her eyes and turns to face me. “I’m fine, Grayson, you helped me, and I’m so grateful for that. But now, I want you.”
